Brian66

It's a very personal decsion. I told almost no one prior to my surgery - just my mother, my children and my brother and sister. For me that was the right decision. When I needed to take off from work, I simply said, "I am having minor surgery. Nothing serious, just something that needs to be taken care of." No one had the nerve to ask. Gradually, as people in the office began to notice, I simply told them that I have been working closely with a doctor and a nutritionist - not untrue. Gradually, I have told my friends and extended family and everyone has been very supportive. I think the fact that people can see the dramatic results when I tell them makes it easier for people to accept. A previous post in this chain makes me wonder if people are talking about me behind my back, but if they are, that's their problem, not mine. I am confident that I made the right decision for me for all the right reasons and I am the only person who has to live with my decision. Good luck to you. Follow your head and heart and you'll do fine. Best to you, Brian

I told very few people before the surgery - my children, my mother and a few close relatives. I simply told work that I needed a few days off for some minor surgery - "nothing serious - just something that needs to be taken care of" was how I phrased it. It worked fine and no one had the nerve to ask me what I was having done. When people at work started to notice my weight loss, I responded that I have been working closely with a doctor and a nutritionist which is not untrue. As time has progressed, I have started to tell my extended family and close friends. Of course there may be some people who do not agree with the choice I made, but, if there are, they have kept their opinions to themselves which is the way it should be. I always tell people -- it was not an easy decision to make, but it was the right one for me and I have no regrets. I know that people have strong opinions about whom to tell and when, but, so far, my approach has worked really well for me. Good luck to you. Brian

This Thanksgiving was my first since having my surgery on July 13th. I've really done very well and have lost just about 100lbs in the 4.5 months since surgery (including 15 lbs before surgery). Anyway, my kids and I travelled out of state to spend the holiday with relatives and we had a very nice holiday. One thing did scare me though -- I was able to eat a whole lot more than I would have expected. I snacked a lot in the hours before dinner (a couple of chips here and a couple of pretzels there) and then at dinner, I was able to eat a small plate of most of the dishes. Granted, I ate a whole lot less than I would have in the good/bad old days, but it did make me keenly aware that I will need to be more diligent about not sliding back into bad eating habits. As we all have been told, this surgery is a tool and it can be misused and mistreated. I know for myself, I will need to watch that. Brian

I have Aetna and I found that the approval process went very smoothly. I lost about 15lbs during the 3 month period. I had my initial consult in late April and I had my surgery on July 13th. Generally speaking, I feel like I had more trouble staying on top of my doctor's office to make sure they were moving things along than I did with Aetna. Good luck to you!

Maddie: Thanks for your post. I too have just hit the 100 lb mark and find it hard to believe. I guess it will take a while for the head to catch up with the body. I found one part of your post particularly meaningful -- it hasn't been all sunshine and rainbows. That is certainly true. It hasn't been easy for me, but at least I have found a tool that works and I honestly feel that I will be able to keep this weight off in a way that I never have before. Thanks again for sharing your words of wisdom and keep up the good work. Brian

Congratulations!! You are off to a great start!

I stepped on the scale this morning (as I do each morning) and was thrilled to see a number that I haven't seen in a long, long time -- 198.8 lbs. The truth is, I can't remember the last time I weighed less than 200 lbs, but I have to think is was more than 20 years ago! Needless to say, I am delilghted with this latest number and can hardly believe that I am here only 4 months after surgery. I am still working on being better about taking my Vitamins and exercising, but overall things are going very well. I am amazed at the changes in my body and I am constantly surprised to find bones sticking out where I had forgetten they existed! People have been very positive about the change in my appearance, although I am still selective about who I tell the full story to. Most importantly, I feel great! To anyone out there considering the VSG - know that it is not the easy way out, but that it does work and will provide you with a tool that is very, very effective. Good luck to anyone out there considering this procedure. I have no regrets and would do it again in a heartbeat! Best, Brian

This is a very personal decision. When I had my surgery in July, I told only my mother, my three children, my brother and my wife's sister (who is like a sister to me) (my wife is deceased). I took the train and subway to the hospital myself on the day of surgery and checked myself in. I had the surgery at about 7:00 pm and I was able to call my family at about 11:00 pm to tell them that I was fine. Like you, I didn't want to hear everyone's thoughts and opinions on the surgery. I researched my options very carefully and I felt very comfortable with my decision. I didn't want anyone second guessing me. I also think a part of me was afraid that the surgery wouldn't work and that the fewer people that knew about it, the better. Now that I am three months out and have lost 85lbs, I have started to tell close friends and family. For aquaintances and most people at work, I simply tell them that I have been "working with a doctor and a nutritionist." This is not untrue and I think it is all some people need to know. The good news is that for the friends and family I have told, people have been incredibly positive and supportive and that has helped a great deal. I think that it also helps them accept my decision (not that I really need their approval/acceptance) when they see all the weight I have lost. I personally think it would be a mistake not to tell your boyfriend, but only you can make that decision. If this guy is a keeper and you are in the relationship for the long haul, I think you should discuss it with him before hand. I know I would be hurt and upset if my girlfriend didn't share a decision like that with me. Good luck to you! Brian

Congratulations! I too did some underwear shopping this weekend and bought XL shirts (down from XXL) and large shorts (down from XL). It is a bit of a private victory, but one that needs to be celebrated nonetheless! Thank God for this site -- where else could we post our underwear victories! Keep up the good work! Brian

Hi Guys, I am just wondering what your experience has been drinking soda post-surgery? I was a huge Diet Pepsi addict before my surgery and have been off it cold turkey since July 12th, the day before my surgery. I went into the surgery thinking I could never have it again, but now I am wondering if that is true. I really haven't found a good substitute and it really is the only thing I miss from my pre-surgery world of eating and drinking and I wonder if I could tolerate a little in moderation (although I alsp wonder if I could keep it to a "moderate level"). I still have to give it some thought and maybe it is a slippery slope that I don't want to start down, but I am wondering how many of you out there drink soda and how you tolerate it. Does your doctor have an opinion about it? Is it true that the carbonation in soda can stretch out our new stomachs? I'd be interested in any information you can share. Thanks, Brian

I got dressed for work today and realized that my belt, even on the tightest hole, was still too big. I went to the shoemaker during lunch hour and had him put two more holes into the belt, so it should last me a little while longer. The lady who owns the shop was really cute -- she didn't charge me and told me that if I gained weight, then she would charge me. What a great feeling! Of course, I could have gone out and bought a new belt, but I think I enjoyed adding the holes to this one even more. Especially, since it wasn't that long ago that the belt was just barely fitting me on the loosest hole and I was just about ready to move up to the next size. I truly do believe I've been given a second chance at making my life work for me. All the best to all of you out there. Brian

Hi Molly and welcome! Good luck to you as you start this journey. Molly is my 16 year old daughter's name, so I felt compelled to write to you to wish you well. I was sleeved on July 13th and, to date, I have lost about 83 lbs in total since starting the pre-approval process in late spring. Things have gone very smoothly for me and I have no regrets. I am a 44 year old single dad of three, having lost my wife to cancer almost 4 years ago. It was really important for me to have this surgery so that I will be healthy enough to be here for my kids as long as they need me. The biggest adjustment for me has been dealing with the psychological aspects of eating so much less than I used to. Although I was prepared for it on an intellectual level, I don't think I was quite ready for the emotional side of that issue. Anyway, as I said, no complications and no regrets. I am very grateful that I have been given the opportunity to use this tool. All the best to you, Brian

Christie, You and your husband look amazing! The progression in the photos is striking. Keep up the great work -- you are an inspiration to many people on this board. Brian

I had my surgery on July 13th and I am down about 75lbs since my first visit to the surgeon in late April (15 lbs pre-op and about 60 lbs since surgery). I definitely feel that I am battling depression at this point which seems crazy to me since I have done so well with weight loss. What I have come to believe is that since the surgery and all the eating changes that it requires, I have lost the number one tool that I had for coping with pressure, sadness, lonlieness etc -- food. When my wife died almost 4 years ago at the age of 41, I was really overwhelmed at the prospect of raising my three children on my own. Whenever I felt sad, lonley or angry, I think I numbed my pain and hurt with food. I gained about 30 lbs following my wife's death and I suppose I should count my blessings that it wasn't more. Anyway, now that I don't have the comfort of food, I find myself facing these feelings almost as if I am dealing with them for the first time and it really sucks. I've decided that I need to talk to a counselor about these issues and I am going to make an appointment to see someone tomorrow. I want to feel as good on the inside as I am starting to feel on the outside and I want to move on with my life. Brian

Good luck Mary! We are rooting for you!

Anna, Congratulations!!! This is the first post of yours that I have read and I can identify with so many of the things you've talked about. I even had a soda dream on one of my first nights aftet surgery! I can really identify with what you've written about how scary it can be to be dealing with emotions and feelings without the comfort that food has always provided. Good luck to you as you continue your journey! Brian

Roboniko, My wife died of cancer almost 4 years ago when she was just 41. I made the decision to have the surgery because I felt that it was critical for me to re-claim my health so that I could be there for my three children. I am the only parent they have left. It has been scary making the decision and going through with the surgery without having my wife to rely on for love and support. One of the things I've thought about since having the surgery is how my wife would have felt about it. She battled her weight her whole life and I think there is a chance that she would have felt some of the same things that your wife is feeling. I don't have any real answers for you, but I would suggest buying her a big bunch of flowers, giving her a hug and a kiss and telling her that you are doing this for her (and the kids if you have any) as much as you are doing it for you. After that, let the chips fall where they may and concentrate on doing what you have to do for yourself and your family. She will come around in time. Good luck to you. Keep us posted! Brian

Good luck to you, JamieLynn! I have found this site to be a great source of information and support. I was sleeved on July 13th and as of this morning, I am down almost 75 lbs from my first pre-op visit to the surgeon. I lost 15 lbs pre-op and have lost almost 60 since the surgery. I have no regrets and this has been the best decision I've made in a long time. I am a single parent too, having lost my wife to cancer in 2007. Although I was concerned about what would happen to my kids if I should experience any complications from the surgery, I ultimately came to the conclusion that my weight was putting my health at much greater risk that the surgery would. I would encourage you to read as many posts as possible and don't hesitate to ask questions. Again, good luck! Brian:thumbup:

OK - I am sure this will sound strange, but in 1982 I visited Ireland with my parents when I was just 16 years old. I bought a beautiful cardigan Irish fisherman's knit sweater -- you know the type - cream with the elaborate stitching pattern. It was expensive even back then, probably $125.00, but it really was a nice sweater. I probably wore it for 6 years or so before I "outgrew" it, but I always took good care of it and it is still in great perfect condition. Anyway, I haven't been able to wear it for years, but I could never part with it - it brought back a lot of memories. Well, you guessed it, I dug the sweater out the other night and it fits! It will look even better when I lose a few more pounds, but it is definitely wearable and it is such a great, concrete sign of the progress I've made. It's a great feeling, but also a little bittersweet, I keep thinking of my late wife and wonder what she would say if she could see me now as I am starting to look more and more like the guy she fell in love with. Brian

Good luck to you. I too am a single parent with three kids, having been widowed three years ago. I was very concerned about the risk of complications and the fact that if anything went wrong, my children could be left without any parents. Fortunately, I did not have any complications and here I am just two months later and down just about 70 lbs. Keep researching all your options and I am sure you'll find the right procedure for you. Brian

Leo: Congratulations. That is awesome. Keep up the good work!

Carrie, I am so sorry to read all that you have been going through. You have been very kind and encouraging to me and I had no idea what you were going through. Since the surgery is irreversible, I would encourage you to see a therapist as soon as possible. You have been through an awful lot and are dealing with some pretty complex issues. It would probably make sense to sort them through with a professional. In the end, hopefully you will be able to come to terms with all that has happened and become happy with the results of the surgery. All the best, Brian

Dave - Thanks for the words of support. Good luck to you as you prepare for the journey. Please feel free to pm me if you have any questions or need any support for yourself. It hasn't been a complete walk in the park, but I have no regrets. Carrie - Where were you with that suggestion before my trip. I did end up doing something like that for the trip home and it helped. Thank God for Greek yogurt! Brian

Congratulations, Christie! You look awesome! I can so identify with your thoughts about guilt. My brother is 4 years older than I am and needs this surgery more than I do. He was looking into it at the same time I was, but his insurance will not pay for the VSG. Needless to say, I feel pretty guilty about being able to have the surgery and having a relatively easy time of obtaining insurance company approval. Unfortunately, we don't have the greatest relationship to being with, so this is not going to help things. Thanks so much for your kind words about my earlier posting. Hope you continue to do so well and that your husband is doing great also. Brian

I can hardly believe it, but here I am about 7 1/2 weeks from my surgery on July 13th and I am just about half way to my goal of losing 125 lbs. Overall, it has been a relatively smooth journey, although there have been some difficult moments along the way. Last week, I took my kids on vacation and it was a real challenge to figure out what I could eat and timing it correctly. The trip involved driving about 2000 miles round trip, so eating on the road proved to be a bit of a challenge also. I think the biggest challenge for me has been dealing with the emotional aspects of not eating all the things I want to when I want to. Although I understand intellectually that this is how I ended up here in the first place (duh?), I don't think I had realized how much of a "friend" food had become in my life and how much I would miss it. This has probably been even more true since my wife died and I've had to cope with all of those emotional issues. So, in some ways, giving up my old eating habits has been another loss with which I have had to deal and that has been a little harder to cope with than I expected. The good news is that everyday someone new notices that I've lost weight and tells me that I look great and I feel terrific about that. I need to be better about monitoring my Protein intake and taking my Vitamins, but I am working on that too. If there is someone out there reading this, looking for guidance as to whether or not to have the VSG, I would unequivocally say "Go for it!" Peace, Brian