Brian66

Thanks for all the support. It feels good to have a place to go with questions and concerns. I think that has been one of the hardest parts about making this decision is not having my wife here to discuss it with. Of course, I have a lot of nervousness and fear, but I think that is natural and I really do believe in my heart that this is the right decision for me. I don't have a date yet as I am in the process of getting all my pre-surgical testing done. I will definitely keep you all posted. Brian

I've been reading these boards for awhile now and decided that it is time to introduce myself. I am a 43 year old male and a single dad to my three children. The last five years or so have been really difficult. My beautiful wife was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive abdominal cancer in November 2004. After two years of intense treatments (including two stem cell transplants), she lost her battle to the disease and died in February 2007 at the age of 41. My kids were 12, 7 and 6 at the time. I've spent the last three years helping the kids cope with the loss and making sure they have what they need. They are doing pretty well, I think, but I feel like I've just been existing. I've always had a weight problem and have probably gained about 35 pounds over the last three years. As a result, my health problems have become worse -- high blood pressure, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, back pain -- you know the drill. Worst of all, at 44 years old, I feel like a 90 year old man. I am about 5'11" and weight 300 which gives me a BMI of about 41. I initially consulted my surgeon about RNY, but he introduced the idea of the VSG, which sounds amazing to me. I was never very comfortable with the whole concept of the intestinal bypass and, as a single parent, I am eager to reduce the risk of surgical complications. Anyway, I'd appreciate any words of advice or encouragement you might have for a newbie like myself. I am basically at peace with my decision to have the surgery, but, of course, I worry about complications and the possibility (however remote) that my kids could be left without a dad after losing their mom. The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that if I don't get rid of this weight, I might not be around for them either. Anyway, thanks for the valuable information so far and I look forward to making this journey with you. Brian