My Life as Liz

What he said. The longer you go without, the less you'll crave it. It gets easier.

Next month will be my one year surgiversary. So I'm wondering what you guys have done or plan to do for yours. My current plan is to go to the boardwalk, ride all the rides I couldn't fit on before all while wearing my new bikini. Unless it's too cold or I can't afford to.

Thank you, Lissa. This is exactly what I needed to hear.

Google is no help, so maybe someone here will know something about this. I tried rowing for the first time today with 7 other first timers (from the support group I go to). The guy in front of me kept telling me what to do in a mean tone and at least 4 times reached back and grabbed my paddle and repositioned it of his own volition. This made me feel like complete garbage. So if anyone out there has experience with rowing, was that ok behavior on his part? I have had an absolutely horrible week, so please, if I'm overreacting, I want to know. Or if I have every right to be upset, I really want to know. The head coxswain guy said I was doing a good job, but I don't feel like I did. Which makes me wonder if he noticed what the guy in front of me was doing and was trying to make up for it b/c I'm sure my facial expressions gave me away at least a little while it was happening. Of course I put on my happy face and said I was doing fine or that my arms were tired when they weren't that bad so I could stop rowing and take a second to not feel like such a failure. It's not just what happened today, but everything building up to it, I just want to cry. And I feel like I can't. I'm to the point where I just can't put on my happy face anymore.

I had such an awesome birthday this year! Friday: It started with a 1.89 hill training walk (after doing 5.21 miles the day before). Then I got a pedicure. I hadn't had one since my sister got married in 2008. Then the rest of the day was a blur from the lovely April 20th holiday. Saturday: I finally got to a support group. It was good. I hadn't been to one all month b/c of work, and I felt really re-motivated to get back on track. We did this exercise where you write on a index card "Today I will" and whatever you want to do. Whether it's exercise, or take your vitamins, or stick to your meal plan, or not eat cake. After this specific group we have a clothing swap. I found this super cute dress that was too big, and I'm saving it for the sewing class I'm going to take next semester. The fabric was too cute to pass up. After that I went to the mall for 3 hours. That is nothing in Liz time. That's like 1 store. And I was able to hit 4 or 5. MAC, Sephora, TBS, Victoria's Secret, and Nordstrom. I renewed my card at MAC. At Sephora one of the girls there applied some blush and lip products on me. Another employee even took a picture of us and texted it to me. That was way awesome. I bought some stuff from the Sephora Pantone collection. At first I was unsure of my purchase, but now I don't regret it one bit, I love it! Then I went to The Body Shop b/c I had $25 in store credit to use ($10 for my birthday and $15 for reaching 4 points aka spending way too much money there. Seriously, I have enough body stuff to last me AT LEAST a year if not longer!). I got this set that has chocolate scented stuff and a loofa, which brought me up to my 8th point giving me a $25 credit I think, and renewing my membership for another year. After the mall I came home, got dinner for Jess and then dinner for me and packed for the hair show and stay at my brothers house. Sunday: I got up super early, went to the hair show and spent way too much money. Monday: I did the same thing minus the spending. I only bought a couple of things. I pretty much didn't eat anything until dinner. I had brought a protein bar with me but it was DISGUSTING!!! So I just went without eating anything b/c everything they had at the show was either super expensive or things that I can't eat. On the way back I stopped at Starbucks and got a grande decaf soy iced white mocha. It was yummy. And I got an extra one which I gave to my sister in law b/c they didn't make it decaf the first time. When I got back my brother, sister in law and nephew took me out to dinner for my birthday. Today (my actual birthday): I got up early, went to Denny's and got my free grand slam. Went to work, got my hair cut/fixed by my manager/friend (another coworker who doesn't like me didn't do such a great job on it). Then I went to Ulta for my free birthday brow wax and the girl did my makeup too. I felt bad for not tipping her more, but I'm so totally broke right now. I really hope she doesn't think I'm a total cheapo. Then I got my free birthday car wash. Then I came home, changed clothes and we went out to a hibachi grill for dinner. After dinner I dropped the bf off at home and went to Ross. There I found this pair of capri/petal pusher pants that I had been lusting over but every time I saw them they only had super tiny sizes like 3 and 5 or the shorts version (I can't wear shorts b/c of my legs). I did a happy dance in the dressing room. It's conceivable that I could fit the next size down (which they didn't have), but entirely possible that I couldn't b/c of my legs, either way, I'm used to wearing belts, so I'm ecstatic that I found them! I also found a super cute dress (I just need to find tights or something to wear under it). Finding the capri pants was the cherry on top of my fantastic birthday. I am so content! And and and I almost forgot. I tried on a pair of size 6 pants (just for the heck of it) and they fit! But they weren't cute enough to justify the price. I think birthday sex may be next and I am so looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow (if I can get to bed at a decent hour).

I'm interested in 8s and 10s.

Are there going to be any future meet ups?

I'm surprised you're allowed beans at 2 weeks out. My program didn't allow it till 3 months. Oikos greek yogurt is amazing! Blueberry is my favorite. Chobani tastes like vomit. I'm not even exaggerating. It tastes like that acidy flavor you get in your mouth after you vomit. I have only tried the honey flavor. But I know a lot of people like it. The only problem with the Oikos is that it has too much sugar for my plan. But it doesn't affect me negatively and I only eat it a couple times a month anyway. There's another brand that has plain greek yogurt that tastes good but idk what it is.

It makes me sad that people have to do liquid diets. I don't see how it prepares you for life after surgery.

What a good idea. Pureed chicken with gravy was one of my favorites during that stage.

Thanks for all the responses. I'm cheap and broke, so that's why I want to get the kids rate if I can. My mom and I usually apply for a scholarships so we can go because we can't afford full price.

I hope this is the right place for this question. Does the hipaa law apply to members of the church? I'm in CA if that makes any difference. I'm wondering because there is this retreat my mom's church does every year that I enjoy going to. BUT I want to pay the kids price since I eat so little now. What you get for the cost of the retreat is the same no matter what age you are, I've gone a bunch of times pre-op. I'm wondering this because I don't trust the clergy members to not let slip that I've had surgery. Especially with how gossipy this specific church is. I'm pretty private about the fact that I've had surgery, and I have family issues, so it would be very bad if certain members of my family found out that I had surgery. That is my main concern. On top of that I don't want to be the subject of gossip. Thanks, ~Liz

My plan says no alcohol ever. You wouldn't want to end up in the ER because because you vomit blood from taking one sip. True story according to the nurse who runs the support group I go to. Either way, I'd wait till at least a year out before even trying any kind of alcohol. You're still healing. Even at 3 months we're still healing. I wouldn't risk anything that could potentially upset your stomach. Especially not in public. Plus you need to be careful about transfer addictions. A lot of bariactric patients become alcoholics. I can attest to the transfer addiction. For me it's shopping.

Do your have a program to follow as far as your diet goes?

The beginning stages are hard. Hang in there. Things do get better. They WILL get better. You NEED to put yourself first. You just had a major operation. The last thing anyone wants is for you to not take care of yourself and for you to have complications. Plus you need to put yourself first so that you can be successful with your weight loss. I am not a doctor. But it may be easier for you to focus on portion sizes and not on grams of protein. For my plan I only eat 2 oz of protein 3x a day. No snacking, no shakes, no calorie counting, no protein gram counting. Like I said, I'm not a doctor, but trying a different way of eating may make your life easier. Every plan is different. I do believe you have to find what works for you and is within healthy guidelines for this surgery. The beginning stages of eating really just plain suck. Once you're on soft solids and then regular solids things get so much easier. You have to go through all the crappy stages to allow your sleeve to heal and get used to eating again. It's almost like relearning to eat. The doctors don't make us do this to torture us.