Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Surgery on the same day as your spouse??



Recommended Posts

For those of you who have done this-

Would you do it this way again - now that you know what you were in for?

What pros & cons did you experience as a result of having surgery together?

Do you have young children - if so how did you manage with them? We have a 9yo DD.

Hubby and I are trying to decide if we should have the surgery on the same day. Our surgeon said he would do this if we wanted.

TIA for your input.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi

I didn't have surgery with my spouse...he is a skinny boy and doesn't need it. But, there is a couple in our local support group that both had surgery with our surgeon earlier this year; he had lap-band and she had RNY. They had them like 2 months apart because our surgeon thinks it is better to have only one patient recovering in the house...in other words, he wants your "support person" to actually be able to support you, both emotionally and physically. I appreciated my hubby being there to take care of me the week after surgery. So, I would recommend you do the surgeries at least 3-4 weeks apart unless there is some deadline you are trying to beat like a change in insurance. Even then, at least give the first person a week to recover before the 2nd one has surgery. Just my 2 cents.

Stacey

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For those of you who have done this-

Would you do it this way again - now that you know what you were in for?

What pros & cons did you experience as a result of having surgery together?

Do you have young children - if so how did you manage with them? We have a 9yo DD.

Hubby and I are trying to decide if we should have the surgery on the same day. Our surgeon said he would do this if we wanted.

TIA for your input.

i did have surgery the same days as my husband, in fact his was an hr right after mine.

my husband's company provides a car service for him to/from airport, so we just contracted them out to drop us off - wait for us; take us home. our's was same day surgery.

kinda crazy taking a limo for a lapband, but we & our surgeon still laugh about it. since we kept this private from family & friends at first; we didn't want to solicit anyones help. odd i know - but that was DH's request.

i am SOOOOOO glad we did this together, not that a few wks apart wouldn't have been a bad idea - but we have no children...so one didn't have to be a caretaker for anyone other than themself. if i did have a kid, i would ask for help / babysitting assistance.....

the first 2 days we looked at each like "what did we just do to ourselves" - but over time; i couldn't imagine going through this w/out him!

word of advice - get your pain meds filled in advance. cause hubby was a bit of a baby the first wk, the morning after surgery i had to drive up and get our prescriptions filled. not a fun experience.

all the best!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would think that the main consideration is transport to and from the hospital. So long as you have that sorted you should be OK. Plus with children you may need someone to help drive them around for the first couple of days.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it depends largely on your dynamic! If you are a good team, generally supportive of each other, etc, then it can work well (although having a little time in between seems smart because of your daughter. You don't want to both be recovering and her need you for example)

I did it, DH doesn't need it, but since we're childless and aren't usually each other's health police or food police we could've done it together. For some, support means "monitor" and that could be problematic.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My hubby & I have just had LBS one week apart.

Our initial reason was because we had to travel to have the surgery, and we have decided not to tell many people - especially immediate family. So doing it this way meant we could go one at a time and the other could stay home with the kids and no outside babysitting help was required. We haven't told our kids 10 & 6 either. When it was time for us to travel, we just told our kids we had work/business stuff to tend to in the city. This isn't unusual so they didn't question it.

Now that we have had the surgery - I am 3 days post op, I am so glad we did it with some time in between! I never expected to be this sore! I am just starting to get around without too much trouble on day 3. I flew home the day after surgery and that was tuff - just having to walk around and get myself where I had to be - OUCH! But my hubby says he wasn't as sore as me - maybe I'm just a wuss! He says he felt like he'd been kicked in the guts and I said I flet like I'd been run over by a truck!!

So, I think it's great to be able to do it with your spouse for the support and encouragement, but for physical reasons, especially with kids, I do not recommend it on the same day! The hard part will be flippin the coin to see who goes first! :thumbdown:

Cheers,

DDiva.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am glad that my hubby doesn't need the lap band and therefore was able to take care of me. Even if he did need the surgery, I would not want him to have it the same day as me.....looking back on the fact that my surgery was more complicated and I had to stay in the hospital an extra 2 days! When I got home, I was still in a lot of pain for another week or more and would have been unable to take care of myself! He did a wonderful job as nurse, housekeeper, laundry guy, and general all around assistant!!

Having surgery on the same day would be great in perfect conditions.......but things sometimes cause unexpected hurdles to spring up......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all for your valuable input! Sounds like most of you would do it separately. I hope to hear from a few bandsters who have done it together and get their story.

-Dawn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×