Can I get pregnant after eating chicken strips three days out from surgery while listening to Michael Jackson music? Inquiring minds want to know.

Man, you guys are good! Can I be like you all when I grow up? I can never get the good zingers in! I think of stuff hours later once the conversation has moved on...

Slim,

Haven't you heard?: Fat people are jolly. Think Santa Claus!!

TPG

Also:

Bored woman + wine + variety of topics + a serious love for stooopid stuff =

Great one-liners and other worthless crap

Slim,

Haven't you heard?: Fat people are jolly. Think Santa Claus!!

TPG

I think I skipped that chapter in my "fat girl" manual.

Also:

Bored woman + wine + variety of topics + a serious love for stooopid stuff =

Great one-liners and other worthless crap :smile2:

:wub:

Speaking of which, my aunt's cousin's BFF's first teacher said that "head hunger" can be controlled by having a 2nd band installed around the neck. Is this true? Can I get it done locally? Will my insurance pay? Do I have to have a low IQ to qualify?

I'd say if your insurance won't pay for it, either wear a REALLY tight choker necklace or simply wear a necktie set on strangle.

What the hell is all this talk about head hunger? I don't WANT any heads! Eyes and cheeks and tongues -- NO HEADS!

By the way, if my band is too tight, can I get constipated? I'm not pooing very well. And when I do, it's got this strange "ring" shape to it...

They will only pay if you are pretty and have big boobs. Oh yea, you have to be blonde too.

Crap, I'M seriously screwed...

Man, you guys are good! Can I be like you all when I grow up?

No. No, you can't. We're full up.

By the way, if my band is too tight, can I get constipated? I'm not pooing very well. And when I do, it's got this strange "ring" shape to it...

:smile2:

Crap, I'M seriously screwed...

You and me both...:smile2:

No. No, you can't. We're full up.

:tt2::smile2:

Hey I've been banded for nearly a year. I can eat a whole gallon of ice cream, a pack of oreos and a plate of chicken strips in sitting. Do you think I need a fill?

Dearest Jennifer,

The problem you are having is caused by the Oreos. Apparently you are NOT eating the super-size, double-filled kind. Please refer to your surgeon's instructions before you have nerve enough to post again.

TPG

Un-bandeded, never bandeded, but still an expert on these matters.

Hey I've been banded for nearly a year. I can eat a whole gallon of ice cream, a pack of oreos and a plate of chicken strips in sitting. Do you think I need a fill?

SURE you can! However, you MUST take note to eat these things in the proper order. Ice cream FIRST, since it melts and essentially becomes liquid. Then Cookies next because, let's face it, they're EXCELLENT sliders. THEN the chicken.

Follow those rules and you're good to go.

I don't get it have you all worked to much today?

Uh, 'nuff said.

(Didn't notice the rant/rave part, huh?) Eeeek. I'm also thinking she didn't read the whole thread from the beginning. Hmmmm. Let's send her a Possum-Gram to welcome her aboard.

TPG