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Excited and Frustrated



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We are going to our first visit with the doctor today for my husbands surgery.

We have an 18mo waiting period for weight loss on our insurance. So, we decided that he needs to have it done first. Me? I have to wait another 18 mos since I was just added to his insurance.

I am so excited for him, but so frustrated that I have to wait so long.

I have always been a big girl. But on top of that I have horrible cholesterol levels. We have three beautiful kids and I want to live longer for them. Not much worried about getting fit and skinny. Although that is a plus, but I just want my heart and body to allow me to be here to help and see them grow. And of course, like all others, I have tried it all.

My husband is the only one working and he is 38. I am so worried about him. My father had his first heart attack at 42.

I just pray and wish that I could come across a bag of money so I could go for the lap band tomorrow. UUUgggghhh.

I dislike having to wait.

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Hugs! I understand where you are coming from. My situation is a little bit different. I don't have to wait because of a 'waiting period', but Aetna requires the last two years BMI to be 35+ (I have comorbidities), but I happened to lose below 35 BMI in the past two years because I was on Weight Watchers. I am still gonna submit (showing a high enough BMI up to 8 years back) and hope they will approve, but I'm getting ready emotionally for the fact that they probably won't approve it. I will appeal, but no guarantees. I just tell myself that if I have to stay this BMI for another 2 years, its not that big of a deal. Its not healthy, but at least there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I saw my mom go her whole life struggling w/obesity, high BP, high cholesterol, and type 2 diabetes and taking insulin for it. And, she just got the surgery one year ago and lost 95 pounds. Soooooo, in the whole scheme of things, if I have to wait two years longer, I can handle that. I figure if it comes to that I will just concentrate on other things during that time other than my weight. Its a relief in a way. But, yes, I would rather get the surgery now and start getting heathier earlier rather than later. Kind of ironic that I could end up penalized for making such a good last ditch effort w/WW. In my final attempt, I did it for 2.5 years and lost 45 pounds, then gained 60 pounds last year. Ugh!

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Sorry for the delay on responding. I was down with the flu.

I hope you trip to the end if the tunel is a short one.

I found out, after being told to gain 10 lbs that I HAVE to wait 18mos and there is no way around the wait period.

So now that I have extended my "wrap around porch" :eek:that I have working here...now I have 10 extra pounds to lose.

Ugh.

I am going to try the Alli and Water pills, and see if I can chain myself to the treadmill.

So, wish me luck.

I do wish you the best and thanks for listening to me.

Hugs! I understand where you are coming from. My situation is a little bit different. I don't have to wait because of a 'waiting period', but Aetna requires the last two years BMI to be 35+ (I have comorbidities), but I happened to lose below 35 BMI in the past two years because I was on Weight Watchers. I am still gonna submit (showing a high enough BMI up to 8 years back) and hope they will approve, but I'm getting ready emotionally for the fact that they probably won't approve it. I will appeal, but no guarantees. I just tell myself that if I have to stay this BMI for another 2 years, its not that big of a deal. Its not healthy, but at least there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I saw my mom go her whole life struggling w/obesity, high BP, high cholesterol, and type 2 diabetes and taking insulin for it. And, she just got the surgery one year ago and lost 95 pounds. Soooooo, in the whole scheme of things, if I have to wait two years longer, I can handle that. I figure if it comes to that I will just concentrate on other things during that time other than my weight. Its a relief in a way. But, yes, I would rather get the surgery now and start getting heathier earlier rather than later. Kind of ironic that I could end up penalized for making such a good last ditch effort w/WW. In my final attempt, I did it for 2.5 years and lost 45 pounds, then gained 60 pounds last year. Ugh!

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your eating habits will change as your husband eats less-- the band is not easy -- I miss the food-- but I love eating so much less -- exercise with your husband and keep thinking maybe you will lose and not have to have the band

I am glad I got it but wish I could have done more on my own

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Thanks for the support.

I know once I do it, I will miss the food too.

I love food. don't we all? I would like to do it on my

own too. But I know that I would love it with the band also. So, if in the next year, I do not do it on my own. I am sooooo getting the band.

I am looking forward to losing with him.

We need our eating habits to change anyways. I love veggies and such. He will not eat them. But I know that with him eating less and better the good habits will rub off on to our kids.

That is what all of this is for. Our kids.

I do not want them to turn out the same way. High cholesterol and high bp.

I have always been a big girl. I carry it well, thank the Good Lord for that. But I would love to be sexy. For myself and for him.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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