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I am so sick of being single!



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I guess I am just venting... but I am so sick of being single. I still feel like the type of guys that I like, won't like me b/c of my weight. I have tried plenty of fish but just keep meeting guys who are old or big babies that throw tantrums and expect a woman to be a servant. I feel like I am going to be alone forever. Should i just settle on someone whom I don't like so much? I just still feel like the big girl that everyone is friends with. :crying::blink:

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I hear ya sista

I too am on plenty of fish, and only seem to be meeting duds! I am starting to believe that there are no decent men left!

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Don't be in such a rush to marry. I'm a big girl. Been married and even had a wealthy, handsome boyfriend for 12 years. I never thought I would ever want anyone else. But I have changed. I haven't even had surgery yet. It's a head change. He and I are not compatable. It was comfortable. Work on you. Love you. Once you have lost all the weight you want to loose; are comfortable being without someone; then you will find the right one. If you settle; you will miss Mr. right. That is how it always works. You deserve the best. Don't settle for less.

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Should i just settle on someone whom I don't like so much?

NEVER!

You'll get there when you get there. Never settle. =) In the mean time, just change pods or fishing gear. :) Have fun!

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your only 28, don't worry you'll meet the right one when it's time. I didn't meet the right guy until I was 40 and I have been blessed. I hope it doesn't take you until your 40. I'm sure not trying to bring you down I'm just saying it will happen. lots of luck and happy hunting!!!

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I dont expect everyone to be Mr Right, but I wouldnt mind having some fun with a few Mr Not So Bads in the meantime.

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I probably watch entirely too much Sex and the City, but I figure the right one will come along eventually and in the mean time, bootycalls are a wonderful thing. I spent years so determined to find "the one" that I missed out on all kinds of fun in the interim and drove myself crazy.

So I'm praising the bootycall and enjoying (what's left of!) my 20s as a single girl and I'm learning to not obsess over finding Mr. Right.

(One thing I've found with POF in particular, I have better luck clicking with people when I go to the meets than going on one on one dates. Maybe it's something to do with being in a large group of people, I have no idea, but I find I'm way more successful that way.) :biggrin2:

Edited by Tristessa

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Ahaha i am not even gonna try to get guys right now, not worth it LOL

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I guess I am just venting... but I am so sick of being single. I still feel like the type of guys that I like, won't like me b/c of my weight. I have tried plenty of fish but just keep meeting guys who are old or big babies that throw tantrums and expect a woman to be a servant. I feel like I am going to be alone forever. Should i just settle on someone whom I don't like so much? I just still feel like the big girl that everyone is friends with. :lol::)

I am on plenty of fish, too. I didn't have much luck on that site, either! Though I feel the same was as you, trust me when I say that there are a lof of men who like big women! Try tangowire.com. they have a lot of specialty sites, including those for bbw lovers.

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I met my husband in a AOL chat room . I'm happy and I know how hard it is to a find a good man. A friend of mine had good luck on match.com.

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FBs can be good, great, but the whole emotion thing gets in the way. I decided a while ago that I didn't have time for emotion. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and we wouldn't be FB if weren't friends, but the whole lovey-dovey, where will this go, yada yada yada needs to be left behind.

I was happily divorced two years ago after being with the same person half my life... and I was only 31 at the time. Since then, I have focused on school, work, and now my health. I have learned more about me in past couple of years than my entire life combined, and I love that! FBs help fill in the blanks without the emotional hassle.

Hmmm, I derailed a bit, but I guess my point is to enjoy what you have right now, focus on you, and the rest will get there when you need it to.

Happy 4th!!

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See, I don't know if it's where I'm located or WHAT, but there is nothing going on in Wisconsin. It's like a desert wasteland out here!

Even though I am smaller now, I still like bigger guys and my biggest push to get this LapBanding done was to be able to date and feel good about myself. Well, great, now I feel great about myself, and it's been 2 years... and there aren't any guys around who see that. I'm young (23), 6'3 and now I'm a size 16 and confident about my looks. It's funny becuase my friends (who are all smaller) get angry when someone whistles at them on the street, but I got my first "whistle at" a couple of weeks ago and it felt great to be accepted into society as someone attractive. But now, I guess I'm angry becuase guys didn't like me fat and that was my biggest excuse as to why they didn't like me back then, and now I'm thin and it is tough to think my personality would ever turn someone off. It's one thing to change the way you look, but to be rejected for being yourself is a depressing thought :D

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OK... I'm not single, but I have had a lot of experience being single.

I met my wife, Lisa, in 1997. I was 37 and she was about 41 then. Neither of us had been married. We hit it off as friends right away, and were good friends.

In the summer of 2001 (July 26, 2001, to be exact), after those 4 1/2 years of friendship, and 2 1/2 years of being e-mail friends living 900 miles apart, we told each other, for the first time, that we loved each other. A month later, I asked her to marry me.

I moved back from Florida to Texas to be with her, but being later in life, we had situtions that caused us to have to wait on marriage.

On July 26, 2006, 9 years after we became friends, 5 years to the day after I told her I loved her, when I was 46 and she was 49, we got married (many people still ask why we got married on a Wednesday morning... now you know "the rest of the story."

It is easy to get tired of being single... but when you least experct it, the right person will come along, and it will be wonderful (and definitely worth the wait).

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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