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Should I be a witch, or no?



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I'm having a hard time fighting my nasty side right now and need grown up advice!

I had a roommate for several months and it was BAD, BAD, BAD....It ended when she left her bathroom with black mold growing in every drain, up the walls, in the sink. Gunk had clogged up the drains - it was disgusting. Even after asking her to clean it, she left it for me to do.

She bounced checks, and I tried to work with her and at the end it the money situation was okay. But it took a while to get to "OK".

I am moving soon, and on 4/1/08 I gave her 2 months notice (until 6/1/08) to leave. She asked if she could pay the last month's rent out of the deposit, and I agreed - however there was a difference in the deposit/rent and she still owed $80 and agreed to pay that on 5/15/08 - - which she said was her last day.

On 5/15 she paid $60 and asked if she could leave a desk in my garage. I said yes she could - only until the first of June and I reminded her she still owed $20 - which she said she'd have in a "couple of days" and that was over a month ago.

Fast forward through a lot of my cleaning her mess that I should have taken out of the deposit if I hadn't been stupid w/the last month's rent vs deposit deal, more hassle from her about her stuff and getting it out, and more angry words from me - to today when she emailed me today and said she's coming by on Friday to get her desk.

The evil B-I-T-C-H in me wants to say NOPE.

I know I should just let her come and go - though she said she doesn't have the money to give me and didn't even acknowledge that she's 2 weeks past due on when I said her stuff had to be out completely.

I'm just so frustrated with her, and can't believe she's used me the way she has - of course, it's me that let her use me.

I feel that people should always do the right thing, let things go..but I am the one that ends up used, out of money and frustrated because I let things go. I'm always letting things go and people get away with things that I think are wrong.

I guess in the end, she'll get the fricken desk back - after all, what's garage space to me, when I have my crap in there, too?

Has anyone ever been in this situation and actually said something like: No. You're time was up on June 1?

I feel like I've done so many favors for her and been nice over and over, even though I wanted to strangle her.

I think I know the answer, but: Am I complete whiny brat that should just let her come over and get it?

(Although, that makes me grumpy, too, damn it! I have to spend MY time dealing with this crap, when it was poor planning on her part to not move it out when she had movers there and a key? Now I have to stay home to get this POS out????)

ARRRGGG - can you tell I'm just really grumpy here over the whole thing? I think I'll end up just letting her come get it, but the big f'ing baby in me wants to say "NO!" And then go suck my thumb.

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I would take the humble side, give her the desk, and be done with it. Once the desk is gone, you never have to deal with her again. You can then get on with your life and start letting it all go. That would be the easiest way.

I do understand the angry side. Been there myself, but it is much easier in the long run to just let it go. Concentrate on the fact that you have your space back and that it is now clean! :biggrin:

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ha ha ha, I love the thought about sucking your thumb. :biggrin: I'm SOOO SORRY! :) You're not being a baby... but for your piece of mind, just have her come get it and be done with it. Tell her if she doesn't show on that day, it's going to the curb with a "free or trash" sign!

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Yeah, I would just let it go. You don't want to end up on Judge Judy, and she is definately not worth all of the angry energy:). Believe me, it will just eat at you and drag some more drama into your life.

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Hi, yes, let her pick up the desk and be done with the whole ordeal. I know it seems like she is getting over on you, but what goes around will come around. God don't like ugly either.

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I like that idea...I could do that. I could limit it to a certain time frame, too! I don't have all day to wait around. I have off on Friday, and she knows that, but I was actually planning to do things. Another thorn in my side....

I will be accommodating, I know it already. I just don't wanna.

You know when you have tons of stress going on, serious things in your life that make you crazy, you're holding on by a thread and some jackbutt jumps in your way? And you just let loose everything at that one person?

She's there now, and I just want to take it all out on her, and partly it's deserved, but I know part of it isn't...

<Sigh> I'll hand over the desk...

But I'm so NOT chatting about the weather.

...stamps foot and inserts thumb....

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Yeah, I would just let it go. You don't want to end up on Judge Judy, and she is definately not worth all of the angry energy:). Believe me, it will just eat at you and drag some more drama into your life.

Oooh...wait-a-minute! I love Judge Judy...Except, I'd embarrass myself. I can hear it now:

JJ: Is it her desk?

Me: Yes.

JJ: Then give it back, YOU BIG BABY!

Me: But, but....I don't want to. I don't like her. Don't make me.

JJ: GIVE IT BACK, CASE CLOSED.

Hmm...Okay, nevermind. Avoidance of JJ would be a good thing.

:biggrin:

Thanks everyone. I realize I'm being unreasonable. High road always wins, right?

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Judge Judy would get her too,

JJ: Weren't you supposed to pick it up on the first?

Other person: Yeah, but I had some things going on.

JJ: Does she look like a storage company?

OP: No, like I said I was intending (JJ cuts her off)

JJ: Next time pick up your stuff or you just might see it at Goodwill!

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I like Judge Joe Brown, he actually will laugh at them! This woman last week (I just happened to off and couldn't keep from watching) said she had an heirloom microwave. He laughed so hard he started to cry! So funny.

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Was she really young? I hate it when young folks (I'm 33) say things like, "My teacher is so old..she's like 29 or something."

Heirloom microwave...wow. That's how Great-Granny got Thanksgiving dinner on the table!

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See, I am just not that nice. I spent too many years letting people take advantage of me, and I don't play that game anymore. I probably would have taken out a storage unit in her name, moved the desk there and sent her the address. Then it would have been out of my hair, she would have to pay the storage fee and hopefully learn a lesson about taking advantage of people.

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I agree give it back to her, WARN her if she doesn't show your gonna curb it/goodwill it etc.

And when she does show I would tell her NOT to bother asking for favors in the future if she can't be bothered with following up more reasonably.

I'm like susan4794 I have been way to nice for to long to allot of people. If I could get all the $$$ back from so called *friends* I have helped out, I could pay for my surgery flat out!! Or buy a new car.

No more of that. Now if someone comes begging I will try to help them out, not by giving them $$ or a place to stay but help them work it out on their own or guide them to possible agencies/programs etc. that can help.

I'm lucky as in our apartment complex I am not allowed to have *visitors* for more then 2 weeks. They don't know this though so I usually say 1 week. Or not at all. lol Mean I know but I have been burned sooooooooo many times I'm not willing to do it again.

Now the only person I will help out in that kind of way is my son, he's been out on his own for 3 years now. And ocassionally needs a bit of help. But at least he pays me back!!

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I woulda put it out on the curb for her to pick up and left LOL I'm mean...if someone else takes it they take it LOL :sad: oh well :frown:

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Hm. I'm still going back and forth. I want to be nice, but I want to be mean.

I think I'll be both. I think I'll haul it out and say, sure - come get it whenever, it's by curb.

The furniture we bought yesterday arrives on Friday at the new house, so I won't be home anyway. I'll have to haul it out in order for her to come get it. I get to avoid her and get rid of her crap all at the same time.

Susan - can you get a storage unit in someone else's name, without paying up front?

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