Fears beginning to set in...

[tai68 0]

Not sure if this is the right place to post this message...I've been doing a lot of random reading throughout the entire board and have lately been focusing on the various messages about how much some hate their band, or the constant gas/bloating, etc, unable to keep any food down, or can't wait to have the band removed...or those who have decided that a different procedure would have been better than the band.

I realize all of us here are different. My experience is going to be completely different from those that I have read. But as my date approaches, 6/30 - I am beginning to feel anxious. I believe that I have made the best decision for myself and have not jumped into this hastily. I so want to be one of those "success" stories where everything goes according to plan - but there is no way to ensure that. It's at this point that I begin to overthink all of it!!!

Right now my life is running so smooth...I had no insurance hold ups with surgery approval, am covered 90%, have the love and support from friends and family, ...work is good, I just got accepted into a Masters program, I'm turning 40 in mid August and will be going on a fantastic vaction to Europe w/ my husband at the end of summer. Seriously, it feels like everything I've ever wanted is coming to fruition...

So why do I have this unnerving fear of doom? I'm not normally a pessimistic person, but I feel like with everything going so well, when will the bottom drop?? I then begin to rationalize that the bottom will be an unsuccessful surgery...

Not really looking for answers or anything...just feel the need to get these thoughts out there...and for the most part have found so much comfort here on this board, just lately have been sidetracked on some of the not so positive stories and aspects of the band.

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.

[Iluvharleys 15]

Every thing you are going through right now is normal. If you didn't go through all kinds of emotions then I would think something was wrong!

Just keep in mind that while you read lots of bad stuff on here, this is a support board and most people come here to find answers. There are a whole lot more people that never have problems and therefore don't need the help of a support board. You will meet people on here and after a while they disappear as they don't need this support anymore.

Just keep reading lots of threads, you will gain some valuable information from these threads even if you never need it, but who knows some day you might have a problem and you will know what to do or what to expect.

Good Luck with your surgery, and don't forget to let us know how everything went!

[wsw27 0]

Hello, I'm having many of the same feelings you are...but I think it is natural to have some fears.

If you are like me, and have struggled with weight and food issues for many years (most of my adult life) then this is a very big step. I'm scheduled for surgery July 1st. In many respects I am letting go of something that is very familiar -- both my weight and my ability to use food as a source of comfort. For me, weight has always been both a shield and a sword. Something to protect myself and "blame" when things were not always so easy for me or did not go my way.

For me the lap band represents a huge change and, in many respects, I feel like I am getting ready to experience a huge loss in my life. I am letting go of something very familiar, comforting. My weight has been part of my "self-definition" for so long, I am worried about not having it as a point of reference. I am so ready to make this change, however, and I think because I'm ready, the feelings are intense. I too have read posts about people being unhappy with the band, but then I'll read another post about how wonderful it has been for someone else and how the band has changed that person's life for the better. There is no right or wrong answer here. You have to do what is best for you. Does your surgeon or local hospital run a support group? Sometimes being able to talk to others who have gone through similar experiences is helpful. Takes the edge off and you know you'll get through the difficult part because others have been through it already.

As for me, I take it one day at a time. I'm awaiting insurance approval and I'm not sure I will get approved because my BMI is 40 and I do not have co-morbidities. At this point, I'm more concerned about not getting insurance approval and what that might mean for me.

I don't know if this has helped you, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in your fears. Good luck to you.

[MerryHearted 20]

Like Betty said, if you are going into this with your eyes open then you almost certainly will have these fears as your surgery date approaches. Completely normal. You'll probably also feel a sense of "what the heck have I done to myself?!" a few days after surgery when you are feeling your worst. That too will pass.

Hang in there!! Don't let the fears get the best of you. The band is a fantastic tool for most of us who get it. It'll almost certainly work for you too. :incazzato:

Best wishes on your surgery!!

[anavrin 0]

I had no fears, just great anticipation, I just figured if I died, I wouldn't be any worse off than living like this, so miserable. I was banded on May 20th, '08, and my only gripe now is having to wait until June 23rd to get the first fill. I can hardly wait! As for pain, 3 C sections, and my gall bladder removed the old way was far worse than this, I went back to work 7 days later, my boss went back after 4 days!

[Kiki220 0]

i totally agree, I was scared to not be fat anymore...what was I thinking, thank goodness I was able to see through this distorted thinking, come out and change my life. I get my nand on the 25!

[wanda-sc 0]

I had my band last Thursday (6-5-08). I am getting over the soreness and I have been a little hungry a few times but the Protein Shakes keep me pretty satisfied. This is a big committment, but as I thought of all my failed diets, I needed this tool to help me, otherwise, I would ruin my body. You have to think about this and hopefully you will feel good about your decision. Good luck.

[Bigjedda 0]

Im getting my band in 7 days and im starting to get scared too!!

[JoelleW 0]

Hi: I am new to the whole LapBand and have joined this website to get info to find out if this is the right option for me. I see you are waiting for insurance approval. Can you please let me know what the requirements are to be approved. Thanks, Joelle

[wsw27 0]

Joelle,

Each insurance company has different requirements. You have to call the customer service number on the back of your card and make sure that this type of surgery is covered under your plan. (Some employers exclude it and it is not a covered procedure). If it is covered, ask the ins. co. to explain the requirements for approval. Some require a BMI of 40 or higher or a BMI of 35 to 39 with co-morbidities (high blood pressure, sleep apena, etc.) On this site, you can go to the Insurance section. You can read posts about people's experience with different companies. But you must call to find out what your plan covers. Good Luck.

[juliegeraci 7]

I love my band and I am a success story. I have lost 70% of my excess weight in 2 years and am 15 lbs from goal. I am down 105 lbs and went from a size 24 to a size 16. You have to be patient with the band when it comes to restriction though. It does take several fills to feel it. Good luck with your surgery.

[IndioGirl55 32]

Tai

I to love my band - I have lost 99 lbs in 11 months (hope to have that last pound off by 6/19) then I can say i have lost 100 lbs in 11 months.

100% of my excess weight.

As it stands now I am 9 lbs below my original goal (I never would have beleived that i could for once in my life attain a goal weight)

I love my size 6 pants was 18/20 - Med tops - was 22/24

I now have Portion Control eat healthy 98% of the time - I now exercise 4 times a week (2 weight 2 cardio) I feel 10 yrs younger - and have 200% more energy.

I have been forturnate and haven't had any complications with my band - I follow the rules - and ya have pb'd a few times - no biggie - I can't eat a submarine sandwich - no biggie

Yes it's good to read about the complications -but not everyone has them - you can be driving to work and get hit by a truck - is that going to stop you from driving...

Yes it's normal to be scared - this is major surgery and not just another fad diet.

The band was the tool that I needed to get my life back...

[weighdown 0]

Hello, I'm having many of the same feelings you are...but I think it is natural to have some fears.

If you are like me, and have struggled with weight and food issues for many years (most of my adult life) then this is a very big step. I'm scheduled for surgery July 1st. In many respects I am letting go of something that is very familiar -- both my weight and my ability to use food as a source of comfort. For me, weight has always been both a shield and a sword. Something to protect myself and "blame" when things were not always so easy for me or did not go my way.

For me the lap band represents a huge change and, in many respects, I feel like I am getting ready to experience a huge loss in my life. I am letting go of something very familiar, comforting. My weight has been part of my "self-definition" for so long, I am worried about not having it as a point of reference. I am so ready to make this change, however, and I think because I'm ready, the feelings are intense. I too have read posts about people being unhappy with the band, but then I'll read another post about how wonderful it has been for someone else and how the band has changed that person's life for the better. There is no right or wrong answer here. You have to do what is best for you. Does your surgeon or local hospital run a support group? Sometimes being able to talk to others who have gone through similar experiences is helpful. Takes the edge off and you know you'll get through the difficult part because others have been through it already.

As for me, I take it one day at a time. I'm awaiting insurance approval and I'm not sure I will get approved because my BMI is 40 and I do not have co-morbidities. At this point, I'm more concerned about not getting insurance approval and what that might mean for me.

I don't know if this has helped you, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in your fears. Good luck to you.

"If you are like me, and have struggled with weight and food issues for many years (most of my adult life) then this is a very big step. I'm scheduled for surgery July 1st. In many respects I am letting go of something that is very familiar -- both my weight and my ability to use food as a source of comfort. For me, weight has always been both a shield and a sword. Something to protect myself and "blame" when things were not always so easy for me or did not go my way.

For me the lap band represents a huge change and, in many respects, I feel like I am getting ready to experience a huge loss in my life. I am letting go of something very familiar, comforting. My weight has been part of my "self-definition" for so long, I am worried about not having it as a point of reference. I am so ready to make this change, however, and I think because I'm ready, the feelings are intense."

How did you read my mind? I have started to cry in the last few days .... and I am not a cry-ing kind of girl. I am scheduled for 6/30 ... if my pre-op fast works, my liver shrinks, my weight goes down, and my cardio is ok....

It has opened up pandora's box ... which had a pretty good lock on it; and now that I don't have food as a comfort option, I will use the "food eating energy" to do the things around the house that I have let go; and get my fat butt on the treadmill to burn the energy.

I completely understand what you feel; positive self-talk is essential; being confident in making this good decision is the best thing for your new change.

It's probably one of the first times that many of us have done something for ourselves, first .... and not been concerned about being a people pleaser or caretaker to others; therefore the emotions and stress are coming forward.

We've stood still in obesity ... now it's time to move out of that shell and reveal ourselves - pound by pound to the world. It's frightening for that reveal to become reality.

It's almost like the show "Clean House"... if you've seen the confused state of how these people are living ... and say..."how in the world could they live that way???" .... once the "stuff" starts to shift out of the house, the people want to "hold on" to what's been comfortable and cause for the confusion; they often break down on something they we as "watchers" think is soooo insignificant ... a Teddy Bear, or a pair of shoes ..... but it's real to them as a symbol of what was or what use to be....

we have to bear that same emotion as we shift out/reduce our weight... and get ready for a new kind of life.

we've taken the major step to "clean our physical house" but we must tend to the "mental house" also.

[weighdown 0]

Not sure if this is the right place to post this message...I've been doing a lot of random reading throughout the entire board and have lately been focusing on the various messages about how much some hate their band, or the constant gas/bloating, etc, unable to keep any food down, or can't wait to have the band removed...or those who have decided that a different procedure would have been better than the band.

I realize all of us here are different. My experience is going to be completely different from those that I have read. But as my date approaches, 6/30 - I am beginning to feel anxious. I believe that I have made the best decision for myself and have not jumped into this hastily. I so want to be one of those "success" stories where everything goes according to plan - but there is no way to ensure that. It's at this point that I begin to overthink all of it!!!

Right now my life is running so smooth...I had no insurance hold ups with surgery approval, am covered 90%, have the love and support from friends and family, ...work is good, I just got accepted into a Masters program, I'm turning 40 in mid August and will be going on a fantastic vaction to Europe w/ my husband at the end of summer. Seriously, it feels like everything I've ever wanted is coming to fruition...

So why do I have this unnerving fear of doom? I'm not normally a pessimistic person, but I feel like with everything going so well, when will the bottom drop?? I then begin to rationalize that the bottom will be an unsuccessful surgery...

Not really looking for answers or anything...just feel the need to get these thoughts out there...and for the most part have found so much comfort here on this board, just lately have been sidetracked on some of the not so positive stories and aspects of the band.

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.

Tai...

I just finished my master's April 2007; and then started this lap band process a few months later in the summer.

I didn't think the stress of finishing school and lap banding would go together well for me.

Self-doubt, emotions are going to be coming up in your life.

Don't put too much on your plate - figuratively and literally!!!!

Take it slow, be aware and find an outlet that doesn't involve food because that's been an intrical part of how we've arrived at this weight crises.

You are not alone in what you are feeling; but find a safe haven to express yourself and find validation.

Unfortunately, many friends/family aren't able to provide you with that safe haven because they have no prior knowledge with which to speak on it or in fact may not be able to cope with their own personal struggles.

I've only told two friends; just recently told one of my sister's who also struggles with morbid obesity; (my other sister is normal weight, and I am not yet willing to share with her; and nor have I told my longest friend can't relate either)

so my safe harbor is small; I don't want/feel like coping with other people's emotions about what I am doing to save my life... not yet atleast.

Have fun in Europe;