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Help!!! I need help, please



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I have been banded since sept.2006 and as of this month i have lost 80 pounds. But i have been at 80 pounds for a while even with tighting my band and everything. I don't know what to do and i am getting very discouraged. I feel like such a failure when i read everyone elses stories and how they have lost more in less time then i have. I recently (3-18-08) have my ovaries removed and now i feel really bad even though i know that i am bloated and swollen due to surgery but it just feels hopeless. Can anyone help me with suggestions and what you eat and stuff like that? I can use anything that i can get. I have to go back to the doctor tomorrow but then i think i will go and make an appointment with Dr. Britt (my band doc) and see what we need to do. But if ANYONE has any help for me i will GLADLY accept it. I have just recently found this site and have been more of a observer than a particapater. Thanks for all your time..

Down and Almost out in alabama:frown:

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Please don't be down. You are one of many success stories that we all read on these boards each day. Being stuck is not failure. Having the band and disregarding its use and helpfulness is failing. You are not one of those. I got stuck and went back on my preop diet for three days. It helped my ease back into my healthier choices of food and drink. Change up your exercise. Talk to your doc. Don't give in and don't give up. Good luck!

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Thanks for the encouragement , but i guess sometimes it just feels wrong when you stop and do don't think you should. I want to tahnk you for your kind words and i will try to be positive.

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I know how you feel. I was banded in Sep of 2005. I lost just over 80 pounds and have/had around 20 more to lose. But my weight loss has completely stalled for about a year now. I even had PS last fall thinking that would help kick-start my push to lose the last 20 pounds but instead I've gained 10.

I realize there is really no one to blame but myself. I haven't been drinking enough Water, eating enough solid Proteins or exercising. So I'm not complaining about the weight not coming off as much as I am about my inability to get my blankety blank head back in the game and start doing what I need to, to get these pounds coming off again.

I just keep hoping that something is going to click and I'll be back "in the mood" to work on losing the weight and until then relying on the band to keep me from gaining back what I've lost.

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To lose 80 pounds and keep it off is a HUGE accomplishment. I think we all need to consider if our goal weight is reasonable, given our obvious love of food. The entire population is not meant to be a size 6 or 8. We are all different and we have to ask ourselves if we are really willing to put in the effort and exercise that's needed to get to those low goal weights. Ask yourself, will your life be that much better at twenty pounds less than you are now?

Weighing 150 or wearing a size ten seems something to Celebrate, not beat yourself up about. I'll bet a year before you were banded and someone said that you'd weigh 150 or wear a size 10, you'd have told them they were crazy, but here you are today at exactly that place. And that's a great place to be. Celebrate it!

Re-evalulate your goal and if you really think it's realistic, we're not in high school anymore :thumbup: then go for it, but understand that it will go slow, even 1/2 pound every two weeks would be a victory.

You are much farther along and have more success than I, but I wanted to offer another opinion.

Remember you weigh 80 pounds less than you did before, so it takes fewer calories to maintain that new weight and even fewer to lose more.

You have both done a fantastic job. I hope to be as successful.

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I agree. 80 lbs is fabulous. I get stuck on very long plateaus and get afraid that I can't lose anymore. Then all of a sudden, I will drop a few more. I wish I was as consistent as others are, losing something every month, but that doesn't seem to be the way my body works.

If you're doing everything you're supposed to be doing, like exercising, I would think that you will lose again.

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Shortgal - I agree 80 pounds is great and the size 10's I'm in now are already smaller than the size 14's I originally hoped for. My biggest problem lies in the fact I'm still sitting at a 10 pound weight gain nearly 6 months after plastic surgery. There is just NO WAY that is all from swelling this far out and even though I shouldnt be focusing on a number on a scale I just can't seem to see my way to being happy with myself unless I can take off those 10 pounds plus at least another 5 pounds to account for some of the 10+ pounds of skin they removed.

It also doesn't help much that one day my DH will see me trying to watch my food and comment that he really doesn't want me losing any more then the next day he will see something I'm eating and ask when my next fill is as if he thinks I'm pigging out.

I don't really feel there is anything wrong with my current weight being my goal. And I've met plenty of women even heavier that I consider at goal. The problem lies in my recent weight gain and whether or not it is a sign of my falling down an all to familiar slippery slope. I'm just afraid if I allow myself to be too comfortable with this weight it will only lead to my continuing to rationalize even more and more weight gain until I'm back to square one.

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Ghost: Well I think you've hit the nail on the head for ALL of us! My biggest fear is not getting to goal ( I know that will be hard enough) but staying at goal. I was actually hoping for a "bumper" of five pounds lower than goal in case I "rebound" a bit.

I think it's all our biggest fear. We've failed so many times before, why would it be easy for us to believe this will work, permanently!

Solutions:?? Getting back to basics? Solid Protein, low carbs, eating slow. Getting rid of any junk in the house and not bringing carbs in for a while.

I recently found everyday, I was so looking forward to and waiting for the moment in each day, that I could add in an Atkins Protein Bar. I mean, I was clock watching for that 3pm snack! That was it. I knew it was a food I better limit in the house for awhile or until I at least get a better fill! It was an ok food choice Protein wise, but I was just spending too much time thinking of when I could fit one in to my calories.

In the beginning of being banded, we are so geared up for the journey and then we start to get back into our social lives and old habits creep back in. How do we learn to control the appetizers, the wine, the meal and dessert that's being served? So much to learn and work at.

I know I will have to learn all these new skills. How do naturally thin people do this? Isn't this the same as learning to ride a bike, anybody can do it?

Let us know how you decide to work at this, maybe you can help someone else, like me!

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Ditto for what ShortGal said. I was sitting thinking, wow! If I could lose 80 pounds, what an accomplishment. Not sure if it is PCOS or what but in 6 months on WW, diligently watching everything, I lost a whopping 7 pounds. Did you get that?? 7 POUNDS. So, give yourself time, talk with your doc (is he the one that had lap band himself?) and see what you can do differently.

Ghost...I have a problem with putting words in DH's mouth that he never intended. Are you sure you're not projecting on him? Bless their hearts, most of the time they're just trying to say/do what they think it is we want them to, unfortunately, they can't keep up with the mood swings! :thumbup: I'm just saying, if he's like my DH, he sees my struggles with weight loss and he wants to be supportive -- He just can't keep up with what day I am on!

No matter what, you ladies are ALL very inspirational and I hope I will be on here a year from now depressed about losing that last 10 or 20 pounds! :thumbup: Keep up the good work -- You'll DO IT!!

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Thank you all for the support. It is great to see it from someone elses point of view. i guess your right i am at a good place, but that temptation to just lose those last 20 pounds is just so much........But i am going to talk to my doctor soon and see what i should do. Also if anyone has any ideas on more Protein reciepes, i would greatly apperciate it. Thanks.

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Have you looked through the "food and recipe" section. The online book stores have some books for receipes " for eating after WLS". I'm sure they must have a lot of high Protein receipes. Or any low carb eating type cookbook, like South beach and Atkins.< /p>

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Do you have a copy of your bandster guidelines? I'm at work, but I think they are something like this:

1. Eat 3-4 oz of solid Protein twice a day, plus 1/2 to 1 cup of produce after the Protein

3. Avoid Pasta, potatoes, rice, bread and other high-glycemic index foods.

4. Drink at least 64 oz of non-caloric fluids daily (except for up to 16 oz of milk, which is fine)

5. Do not drink anything for at least 1 hr after eating.

6. Avoid any mushy foods that slide through the band too easily - yogurt, cream Soups, etc.

7. Take a multi-Vitamin daily

8. Get 30 min of exercise at least 3 days a week

9. Stay away from junk food and alcohol

Are you having any trouble with any of those? Even if you are following them really well, most people say those last few pounds are the toughest. So hang in there.

Oh - fitday.com is free if you want to try logging all your food for a couple weeks and see what your daily intake is. Might be too high or too low.

Congrats on the 80 lbs you lost -- that's fantastic! I can't wait til I'm out of plus sizes. :thumbup:

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Thanks for posting the guidelines again. I have let my Protein kinda slide so now i am looking for lots of high protein reciepes. Other than that i am feeling much better about things and have even decided to try a new workout to change up my routine. Thanks for everyones support and i hope everyone well with their journeys. If i can be of help to anyone , please always feel free to contact me.

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