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So Much Anxiety



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So very soon I start getting all my preop doc appt's done and I have everyone of them scheduled within a a week of one another. I will be done my psych eval, which is my last before getting a date on 3/11. I think that i've been researching and so excited about getting the surgery that now that I know I have a week and 2days before it's set and just a matter of paperwork, I've been thinking about it non stop. I have so many emotions It literally causing me insomnia. I'm excited beyond belief, and scared of so many things, the surgery, the change in life, the possibility of failure. I feel like if i'm like this now, when i actually get a date I might end up having a heart attack from all the anxiety and the pressure i'm putting on myself. Not just to succeed in weight loss but my life changes too.

I thought about it tonight and had a conversation with my best friend and I really think my biggest problem in general is I constantly feel like I'm dissapointing myself, and my parents. Not that they are ever disapointed in me but I don't want them to ever be, I want to be the daughter there proud of not that causes issues , because sometimes I still make stupid childish mistakes nothing big, but enough to usually cost me money I can't afford to pay, or whatever so my unhappiness about feeling like I'm not perfect, manifest itself in my weight. Is anyone else like this? did anyone feel so much anxiety even before they got ther surgery date?. don't misunderstand I want this surgery! maybe my anxiety is about the unknown of being thin for good. I do think alot about buying clothes and going to the beach and feeling good about myself walking around in public. i just wish my thought didn't keep me up at night.:rolleyes2:

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I personally didn't have the anxiety you are talking about, because I did all my band research when I had no insurance and no money... My mom and I were talking about a co-worker who had the bypass and was eating a decent amount more than she should have been and I mentioned the band. She said "Wow, that sounds interesting, you should do that, I'll pay for it". I was in the OR a month after that with Dr. Rumbaut. So that didn't leave much time. The night before surgery though, I did burst into tears and I couldn't stop crying for like an hour. I think I HAD anxiety, but I was just too excited to actually notice and my body said "YOU ARE DEALING WITH THIS NOW". heh

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I can relate and I understand exactly how you feel. You are scared of failure and are probably hard on yourself for mistakes you have made in the past. Whenever I start to feel like you I have to stop and remember that there really is no option (for me anyways). I have an eating disorder that I often can not control. I then try to re-focus my energy on how to SOLVE the addiction/disorder in a way that will be successful.

The Lapband surgery's long term effectivness is statistically superior to non surgical weight loss programs. Even if you "fail" at the Lapband at least you made a rational attempt to fix your problem.

I'm not banded yet either and my emotions have been all over the place. I can sort of understand how you might be worried about getthing thin...but to be honest it's more about how others will react to you once you are thin. I wouldn't worry about this because there is nothing you can really do that will change how people react to the "new you".

Anyway, I hope your anxiety will fade away. If you are like me, the anxiety will come and go a few more times. I hope it all works out for you (and me). :rolleyes2:

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I am starting to have the anxiety. I have been telling myself and my family how I am tired of failing at losing weight and I NEED to have this surgery so I can be healthy and happy. But what if I still fail? I know that is a possibility and it scares me to death!! To deal with it and all those other troublesome thoughts that hound me throughout the day now, I journal. I have a journal I am keeping solely for the surgery and tracking all my thoughts and feelings about everything to do with it. So even if I don't have anyone to talk to about it all sometimes, I am still getting it out. One day, I will be thin and healthy and read all that I am writing now and think to myself, "What was my problem???"

Good luck to you!!!

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...for us. no anxiety YET. but i do have the same fear of failure. putting all this money into my body and having yet another procedure fail (i had Lipo when i was 18. i know i wasn't mentally prepared). this time around i see things differently and i am trying my best to think & imagine the best outcome with my band. for me its not about image, i love my body as is, but my health is slowly taking a toll. i need this surgery and i know only i have the power to succeed; as do you. i too have started to write about all of this in my journal...it helps so much. i wish you all the best, keep your heads up, and remember your lbt friends are a source of motivation & support!!:biggrin:

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Hello.. I'm two weeks away from my surgery date. I'm on my liquid diet, and my children find a way to say jokes about my liquid diet! They think its silly that I've chosen to do this diet. I have not yet shared with them I'm having the surgery because I'm afraid they will make fun of my decision!

Sad and confused!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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