Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

How to deal



Recommended Posts

I wish now that I had just told my DH since he really is the one that supports me in anything I do to better my life, new job, go to school, every diet I've done in the past, ect. So I decided not to talk to those non supporters about it anymore. I even told a few of them I changed my mind just to get them off my back. DH backs my lies too, isn't he the best? One of my off the scale goals is to feel comfy enough to get some sexy undies to reward him.:biggrin:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish now that I had just told my DH since he really is the one that supports me in anything I do to better my life, new job, go to school, every diet I've done in the past, ect. So I decided not to talk to those non supporters about it anymore. I even told a few of them I changed my mind just to get them off my back. DH backs my lies too, isn't he the best? One of my off the scale goals is to feel comfy enough to get some sexy undies to reward him.:thumbup:

Good for you (and sounds like its good for him too!:biggrin2:)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I stated this in another thread, but for some reason, the idea of us losing weight seems to intimidate those around us, even the skinny. Seems to me that no one really wants me to succeed.

Some are afraid you wont want to hang out with them if you're thin, some don't want you thinner than them, some like having their fat jolly friend. It's a sad thing, but oftentimes people aren't truly happy when someone else has good news.

What part of VA are you from? I live in Spotsylvania and work in DC.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Boo Boo Kitty, I never noticed that "before" shot in your pics. You look AMAZING! Congrats.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I live in Caroline County in Lake Land'or (exit 110 off I95) and I work at MCB Quanitco. I used to live in Spotsy. DH graduated HS from Spotsy High.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Boo Boo Kitty, I never noticed that "before" shot in your pics. You look AMAZING! Congrats.

Thanks Suzanne.

I agree with you , some people just want to stay the skinny ones, and don't want to share the spotlight. :thumbup:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told people thank you when they said I didn't need surgery. I guess the next would be, "you have so much confidence in me. I appreciate the support". However.....when my husband started giving me a hard time before my first fill, which is Monday, I said when he had lost all his extra weight and left off candy, colas, and beer, he could say those things. I guess I have a little shorter fuse when he gives me that LOOK.:Dancing_shocked: Oh well. He hasn't said anything else today at least.:thumbup:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with all the comments here but none sticks out more than 'noone else wants you to succeed'. Is it because we would be a threat to woman kind being skinny? Is that their problem?! :thumbup:

I sincerely believe that not too many people know why this surgery is available. I believe that people don't know anything about it plus what it is like to be obese, slimmer, more obese, slim again etc. you get the idea. It's such hard work, even thinking about losing 30kg is hard work enough for me! When I was infertile, noone was able to understand what I was going through, they couldn't relate, they couldn't understand or sympathise with our plight unless they were going through it too(I have gone on to have three children thanks to fertility treatment). I believe it is the same thing. People can't sympathise/relate because they can't imagine what life is like being like us (as a group I mean). There's nothing like free pychological help like these bulleting boards - they are a fantastic support because we can all relate.

Once you make your decision, keep it to yourself unless you necessarily have to. I did, and I love the fact that I have a secret that only my hubby and one girlfriend knows. I see the scales drop, my clothes getting bigger, and I can walk around with my head held high knowing that I am succeeding and people will look up to me no matter how I got there. When I get to goal, I will probably tell people how I did it as I will be so much more informed, and able to answer any questions and more importantly be confident enough to ignore the knockers of the surgery and say things like, "hey it worked for me then it must be good"

Good luck anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Christal, Just like you-I have lost the weight and gained it back and this time it will not happen-I am getting banded next Tuesday in Mexicoand am quite proud to say I have lost close to a third of what I need to lose since Jan. 8th. This time I will not gain it back, I will lose all the extra weight and I don't give a good goddamn what anyone else thinks about it-I am self-pay, so obviously I have thought this out and I don't know of anything better to spend money on than your own health! Good luck to you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks Suzanne.

I agree with you , some people just want to stay the skinny ones, and don't want to share the spotlight. :wink2:

Agreed! I have someone in my office that I got to know pretty good and quickly. Thought we had grown a frienship, which was nice. Well, just before my surgery and up until now, she can't even form two words to me anymore - even "Good Morning". I'm beginning to suspect the green demon has taken her place, especially when she looks me up and down and can't acknowledge anything.

Anyway, they will just have to deal with us divas! Beautiful on the inside, and now on the out!! :wink2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×