Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Jeff Foxworthy's Wisconsin



Recommended Posts

Jeff Foxworthy on Wisconsin

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too pricey," you might live in Wisconsin .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin .

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin .

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Head cheese, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have either a pet or a child named "Brett," you might live inWisconsin .

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Waukesha , Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live inWisconsin.

If every time you see moonlight on a lake, you think of a dancing bear,and you sing gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters,"....you might live in Wisconsin .

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on thehighway.

2. "Vacation" means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend.

3. You measure distance in hours.

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.

6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday.

7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals ).

9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave bothunlocked.

10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them.

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farmat any given time.

13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled withsnow.

15. You refer to the Packers as "we."

16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau.

19. You consider Minneapolis exotic.

20. You know how to polka.

21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

23. Down South to you means Illinois .

24. A brat is something you eat.

25. Your neighbor throws a party to Celebrate his new pole shed.

26. You go out to fish fry every Friday

27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

29. You find minus twenty degrees "a little chilly."

30. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Wisconsin friends.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Mr.Kantos

      Just signed up. Feeling optimistic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Frugal

      Welcome to Frugal Testing, where we are committed to revolutionizing the software testing landscape with our efficient and affordable solutions. As a pioneering company in this field, we understand the challenges faced by startups, small to medium-sized businesses and any organization working without budget constraints. Our mission is to deliver top-notch testing services that ensure the highest quality of software, all while keeping your costs in check.
      Frugal Testing offers a comprehensive suite of testing services tailored to meet diverse needs. Specializing in different types of testing including functional testing, automation testing, metaverse testing and D365 testing, we cover all bases to guarantee thorough software quality assurance. Our approach is not just about identifying bugs; it's about ensuring a seamless and superior user experience.
      Innovation is at the heart of what we do. By integrating the latest tools and technologies, many of which are cutting-edge open source solutions, we stay ahead in delivering efficient and effective testing services. This approach allows us to provide exceptional quality testing without the high costs typically associated with advanced testing methodologies.
      Understanding each client's unique needs is fundamental to our service delivery. At Frugal Testing, the focus is on creating customized testing strategies that align with specific business goals and budget requirements. This client-centric approach ensures that every testing solution is not only effective but also fully aligned with the client's objectives.
      Our team is our greatest asset. Composed of skilled professionals who are experts in the latest testing techniques and technologies, they bring dedication, expertise and a commitment to excellence in every project. This expertise ensures that our client’s software not only meets but often exceeds the highest standards of quality and performance.
      Frugal Testing is more than just a service provider; we are a partner in your success. With a blend of quality, innovation and cost-effectiveness, we are here to help you navigate the complexities of software testing, ensuring your product stands out in today's competitive market. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×