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My first Christmas party since WLS ...any advice ?



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Well - it's here. This will be my first Christmas since I had my gastric sleeve. That means " food fest 2023" . 😬 Our whole family gathers together and brings tons of food. Our whole family is mostly overweight,too. I know I'm going to get the "you look skinnier since the last time I saw you " and "oh you have to try this- it's a new recipe " and "is that all you're having ?" I don't have a problem controlling what I eat - it's handling people who are trying to control what I eat ! I'd love any advice or tell me how you navigate a food based party. Thank you so much :)

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Ahhhh yes the food pushers!! Honestly what I do is, take a little bit on my plate and just baby sit it all night. and if someone asks did you try "XX" I say its on my plate Im just not there yet. Honestly my entire family is overweight to and as long as I have a plate and at the table no one even notices what I am and am not eating. I baby sit my mocktail and just chat and enjoy the night.

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7 hours ago, AmberFL said:

Ahhhh yes the food pushers!! Honestly what I do is, take a little bit on my plate and just baby sit it all night. and if someone asks did you try "XX" I say its on my plate Im just not there yet. Honestly my entire family is overweight to and as long as I have a plate and at the table no one even notices what I am and am not eating. I baby sit my mocktail and just chat and enjoy the night.

I do this too! I've found that if I just have some food in front of me, it doesn't matter and no one really notices. Also, I second babysitting a mocktail and chatting most of the time. If I get tired of the adults, I go hang out with the kids or teens for a bit and check in on their lives, too (because they're not as mean or pushy as the grown-ups! lol).

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I've had 2 holiday seasons with family (who don't know I had surgery) and just coming up to my third! I've handled them all differently. The first was really tough because it would have been less than 6 weeks after my op so I just didn't go. Last year I made sure my partner was sitting next to me and then put most of my food (we get a huge loaded plate each) onto his, in small increments. I also ate 'in reverse order' - carbs first, then veg, then a tiny bit of meat (which halts everything for me, LOL). This year I will be able to eat like half a normal dinner (so a quarter of the massive dinner we seem to get served). I'll push the rest about on my plate and feed some to the dog. Like lots of the *always thin* people have done for years.

At various times over the last 2 years I have disposed of food - into bins and occasionally wrapped in serviettes into my handbag, LOL - and hidden food (eg ordered a chicken salad where I eat the salad and then hide all the chicken under the last few leaves). Just to deflect attention.

People who can be open about the fact they have had surgery just quote the surgery. If you're telling folks you're on a strict weight loss diet for your health that works too.

I do (really do) understand the special pressures of a family Christmas and I hope you get through it well. It gets better, I promise.

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I’ve been fortunate in that my family has been quietly supportive. No one really says anything & in some cases will offer alternatives. Whenever others are hosting, I don’t make a fuss about what I can or can’t eat just make the best choices I can from the options. I’ve become adept of putting a little taste of a variety of food on my plate & saying thank you but I’m fine or this is plenty for now, maybe later. I happily sit there with my half empty plate while others’ are overflowing. I do allow myself a little more flexibility at Christmas: it is only one day a year. What’s funny is that I make most of the Christmas Desserts yet I very rarely eat sweets any more. This is really the only day I do & choose a little bite or two of the things I enjoy most.

So many equate socialising with eating & drinking but really socialising is about being with people you love (or tolerate in regards to certain family members 😉). Instead of eating, talk with those you’re with.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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