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On 10/12/2022 at 9:31 AM, ShoppGirl said:

Maybe once you get your surgery and you are recovered and all that you can send that other team an email. Not a rude one (even though he does deserve that a little) but constructive criticism. Thankfully this experience did not discourage you from surgery alltogether but for someone on the fence it could have. So if this doctor actually hears what you say and makes some changes it could help him to help more people. His bedside manner is definitely not your responsibility and you shouldn’t spend one more second thinking about this if you don’t want to but learning his actions cost him a patient may actually open his eyes. For now, focus on your surgery though. That’s the best way to ensure that this guy doesn’t get away with how he treated you.

That is very true, and a great suggestion! Thank you!

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On 10/12/2022 at 9:08 AM, SpartanMaker said:

Don't know if that's quite a universal truth, but there is an important point here: bedside manner be damned, I want the best. I'd much rather have an a-hole that's really good at what they do, than a super nice person that's just an average surgeon.

Hopefully the OP won't have to make that choice. There are actually decent human beings that are really good surgeons as well. I hope you can find one

I actually agree with you 100%…idk, maybe I was just in my feels because the whole thing is a lot. I am glad I finally made the decision to work towards bettering my health, and I may need to get thicker skin. Hopefully this process will help with that. Thank you for your response!

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I'm lucky that my surgeon is really good AND had a great beside manner, but I can tell you as a nurse who's been around a lot of surgeons, some of them are great at what they do, but not at dealing with people. As long as they weren't egregiously rude, I wouldn't necessarily rule one out for not having the best bedside manner, but I would definitely get another opinion if someone made me uncomfortable. There are plenty of excellent surgeons who also have excellent besides banners out there.
Good luck to you!

Sent from my Pixel 5a using BariatricPal mobile app

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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