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Activities with Partner after surgery



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So I’m a newbie and my surgery is scheduled for next week on 9/27 and I’m wondering what the veterans recommend for activities to do with your partner after surgery.

Date nights for us would usually be dinners, movies, or bar trivia. Movies I see how that can be adjusted by not eating bad stuff. But what kinds of things have you guys found to replace old habits/hobbies that revolved around food and/or alcohol?

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I think it's really just about spending time together. You don't actually have to "do" anything other than focus on your partner for a while. For example, if you can do that just sitting and talking, that's a good place to start.

For other suggestions, my #1 would be walking. Bonus points if it's somewhere beautiful. Others would be travel, exercise classes & yoga, gardening, riding bikes, sports like golf or tennis, shared hobbies, museums, concerts, etc.

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The hardest part of going out to eat for me was the not drinking any liquids while eating part. And the movies was good, I just brought some Snacks and got a Water.

It's definitely not the same, but if your partner knows you needed this, they adjust to make it work as much as you do.

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2 minutes ago, SuziDavis said:

The hardest part of going out to eat for me was the not drinking any liquids while eating part. And the movies was good, I just brought some Snacks and got a Water.

It's definitely not the same, but if your partner knows you needed this, they adjust to make it work as much as you do.

The first time I went out to eat when the waitress asked what I wanted to drink, I said "no thanks" and she looked at me weird and said "You don't want a drink". I said "no thanks" and she just said ok. Then I felt really weird and now always just order a Water and don't drink it. haha

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11 minutes ago, kcuster83 said:

The first time I went out to eat when the waitress asked what I wanted to drink, I said "no thanks" and she looked at me weird and said "You don't want a drink". I said "no thanks" and she just said ok. Then I felt really weird and now always just order a Water and don't drink it. haha

Yes, same!

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No lie... my mind went to a different type of "activities";)

I was amazed by how much of our time together revolved around food so that was different in the very beginning, but you can always find something at restaurants and whatnot. If your partner is willing and able though, you can all kinds of activities that were hard before like hiking, go carts, amusement parks, travel in general....

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1 hour ago, njlimmer said:

No lie... my mind went to a different type of "activities";)

Lol, me too!

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i hope to discover new activities after surgery to do… maybe going on walks or hikes etc instead of focusing on just going out to eat. My husband and I take day trips just to go to further away restaurants… going to modify them into doing something else too since I will be physically able to actually move without as much pain (already can move so much better)… Going to focus more on the social aspect of going “out.” Talking and sharing and ordering only a small, reasonable something to enjoy. Even now I will sometimes pre portion my meal for the part I am going to eat now and the part that I will eat at another meal (i love leftovers lol either as is or repurposed! fajita omelets are a favorite ;) )

it’s an amazing opportunity to seize a new, more full life with more saying yes to things than we have been able to at higher weights!

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      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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