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Mind Games (in my own mind)



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This whole process really screws with your mind. I'm 10 weeks out. This is what goes on in my head constantly. I lost 50 pounds before surgery and "only" 25 since. Woot! I lost 75 pounds total. I'm "only" losing two pounds a week. OMG I'm losing TWO pounds a week!! I don't feel like I look like I lost 70 pounds. Oh wow! My belt went from one notch to 5!! I feel the restriction. I don't feel the restriction. Maybe I'm eating too much and stretched out my pouch. I gained a half pound in one day...must be Water. I gained a half pound in one day...I'm going to have to go back to my old clothes! I gained a half pound? I probably look exactly as I did day 1. What if this doesn't work? I ruined my life. I'm so glad I had this surgery. I'd never be able to continue losing weight and keep it off.......and repeat.

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a two-lb a week loss is pretty common after the first month or so. So you're doing fine!

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It is normal to be thinking like you are. I think most of us do the same thing. It looks like you lost most of the easy weight before surgery. Many of us lose a bunch in the preop diet and the rest of the easy stuff in the first month post op then it slows down considerably. After my 3 week stall which lasted 2.5 weeks I am back to losing about 4 or 5 pounds a week. I anticipate that slowing down considerably as I pass 2 months post op. I obsess over weight from day to day and I know I shouldn't be looking at it every day but I do anyway. I find if I UNDER EAT then my body holds on to the weight a little more, like I am going into starvation preservation internally. I upped my calorie intake from 750-800 to 850-900 and it seems like the weight is coming off again. I tinker with things when I slow down to see if I can get it going again. The nutritionist is good about giving ideas on what to try.

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I'm 4 weeks PO and have the exact same internal argument all day every day. Weeks 1 & 2 I lost 6lbs each, week 3 was barely 2lbs and I pitched a fit. Its been really helpful to read the stories and experiences of other folks though, it helps me remember that everyone is different, everyone goes at their own pace, and all of the WTF moments are completely normal. I'm really focusing on my mental health as well, working on my relationship with food and my body, etc. Because it is such a mind game, regardless of what the scale says, I want to be HEALTHY, including internally. Just know, you're absolutely not alone!

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I agree with what’s been said so far. One tip: you shouldn’t weigh every day, especially when those .5-2 lb gains take you on an emotional roller coaster ride. I know they did for me……in the old pre-VSG diet days (Jenny Craig, LA Weight Loss, Atkins, Keto, etc etc), I would weigh myself daily, sometimes even more often. I weigh now once weekly on the day of my surgery (Thursday), and it’s a relief not to be shackled to the scale!

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I've never felt so seen. Seriously. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, I find myself convinced I'm going to, I don't know, eat an extra 200 calories and suddenly be back in the Big and Fat Men's store. I am trying to find someone to help me navigate this.

Add to this that even though I am thrilled by the weight loss, it does come with its own annoyances. [CENSORED], I wanted to wear this particular outfit and it looks like a tent on me! Ugh, will this skin resolve on its own? For fox sake, will I ever be able to shop anywhere but the Goodwill and Ross Dress For Less? (I'm cheap—I don't want to buy clothes I'll only wear for a month or two unless they're seconds.)

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I know logically 2 pounds a week is great! And I know that a few “extra” calories a day isn’t going to make me gain back 70 pounds overnight. But some days I’m just not feeling logical. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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I feel the same, same argument in my head.

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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