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I feel like everyone else can get the surgery but there is no way it will happen for me. I will be the last fat person in my family and i'll die unhealthy, pathetic and hiding from the world. I lost 150 pounds before then got married to a food addict and gained almost all of it back. I can not do it anymore. If i can not get it i do not want to be alive anymore. I have no quality of life and now i have gout. I need some good news. I go in september 11th to see what the surgeon says. Anyone else feel this way?

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Don't stop trying! If the surgeon for some stupid reason doesn't approve your surgery then get a second opinion! Don't take no for an answer! I understand feeling like the odd one out in your family, but don't give up like that! I was 389 pounds and 150 pounds heavier than the next heaviest in my family. I had zero self-esteem and have battled with on and off depression my entire life. Now I've lost almost half my body weight and am incredibly proud of myself and I'm only 7 months out! Plus, I lost 64 pounds on my own before I even HAD my surgery! You just have to trust that it'll happen for you! You might end up having to be that pushy patient that just doesn't give up until someone says yes, but trust it'll happen! Try not to get down and try and pump yourself up. BELIEVE it'll happen!

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Hi Chrissylynn80

Its been many years since I have posted on here, but your post has just hit out at me. I'm sitting up, in the middle of the night in Scotland UK. You have a massive family here at Bariatricpal - and I'm pretty sure that each one of us can relate to how you are feeling at this moment!

You simply can not give up - and as the other lady said, you must get a second, even a third opinion if you come up against a door that first appointment you have. DO NOT GIVE UP!

I thought that it would never happen to me - they put me on new diets - meal packets - that they were using as a trial, I truly felt like a guinea pig - but I did it. It took me a full 6 years to get the sleeve done, from going to my doctor in the first instance, to going through those theatre doors. 6 years is a long time when you are struggling with weight issues and 3 young kids, to me it did feel like a lifetime, but sticking with it was what had to be done - and I got there in the end.

Thinking of you - and virtually throwing all my available willpower your way. Please don't be giving up - you owe this to yourself x

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Thank you both. That helps a lot. I feel the odds are against me and yet it was so easy for everyone i know. I hear all these horror stories on here and i think that will be me. I waited too long. I gained my weight back 8 years ago and i should of done it then. I kept trying to do it myself and it was hard to admit i could not. I am ready to do what i have to. It has been a rough lonely day and i am so glad i found this place. I can finally get some sleep. Thank you guys again.

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You just keep thinking postively. Don't stop until you get where you want to be.

sleep well :) x

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8 hours ago, Chrissylynn80 said:

Thank you both. That helps a lot. I feel the odds are against me and yet it was so easy for everyone i know. I hear all these horror stories on here and i think that will be me. I waited too long. I gained my weight back 8 years ago and i should of done it then. I kept trying to do it myself and it was hard to admit i could not. I am ready to do what i have to. It has been a rough lonely day and i am so glad i found this place. I can finally get some sleep. Thank you guys again.

horror stories are rare - most of us sailed through just fine.

I don't know how old you are, but there are a lot of us who had surgery in our 50s or 60s. We even see an occasional person in their 70s...

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On 8/27/2020 at 9:20 PM, Chrissylynn80 said:

I feel like everyone else can get the surgery but there is no way it will happen for me. I will be the last fat person in my family and i'll die unhealthy, pathetic and hiding from the world. I lost 150 pounds before then got married to a food addict and gained almost all of it back. I can not do it anymore. If i can not get it i do not want to be alive anymore. I have no quality of life and now i have gout. I need some good news. I go in september 11th to see what the surgeon says. Anyone else feel this way?

Dont give up !!! It took me 2 years to finally have the surgery. I had to switch back to my old Dr. that was in a different town that I had moved from because my new Dr. would NOT sign the papers for me to even go see the surgeon unless I did his requirements first !!! SERIOUSLY !!! I stayed with him until I realized he had control issues and was never going to help me. I went in and seen my old Dr. who signed the papers that day and I have stayed with her ever since. I just drive 20 min when I go see her.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

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      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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