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Hi all! This forum was recommended to me. I’m a few appointments into the process for a possible RNY. My highest weight was probably 370 and my starting weight was 340 and current weight is 323. My goal to hit to get approved is 322.6. It’s only taken a month to get close to the goal... Great, right?

However, I’m nervous about my ability to stick to a diet long-term. I’ve been super successful losing the required weight, but only because I’ve given myself cheat meals and then gotten back on track. I know that with the surgery, it will be a long while before I can tolerate cheat foods... and that makes me nervous. I’m also nervous that a month isn’t really a long enough time to address a lifetime of bad eating habits and that if I proceed too quickly, I won’t have fixed what got me here in the first place... anyone else have similar concerns or suggestions on how to work through this?

Thanks!

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Hi,

I worry about sticking to the diet long term as well. I started cheating on the diet too. The most important thing is honesty with your team. I asked for help. The nutritionist and I sat down and figured out what situations cause me to want to cheat. Family get togethers are one factor. The other is emotions/stress. Im going to try bringing foods I can eat to family get togethers. I am seeking counselling for the emotional eating.

I know it is hard. I believe in you.

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I am right at the beginning of the process too. I am due my first appointment to the weight clinic any day now. I’m trying to get as much information as possible. There’s a lot of people that make youtube videos talking about their experiences but I’ve never seen many that soley discuss the food parts. I have a habit of eating when I’m feeling emotional in order to block everything out and I’m terrified I’ll end up desperately seeking another vice or just going back to my old ways. I’m also quite a picky eater which I hate so I’m worried about what kind of diet I will end up having.

I plan on writing down every single one of my triggers and then working out a way to deal with them other than turning to food.

Another thing you could do that I did is to make a note of all the negative things your weight has caused. Personally speaking I put a lot of the nitty gritty, ugly details down, things I’m way too ashamed to tell anyone about. But I think it could be a good way to remind myself why I’d never want to fall back into my old habits.

I know there’s only 2 suggestions there, I really wish I could give more advice! But what I do know is that I’m in the same boat with you on this worry.


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Welcome to the forum. Whenever someone on this board asks, "Anyone else experience this?" The answer is YES! We've all had doubts, we've all cheated a little here or there, & we've all dusted ourselves off & gotten back on program. And you know what? You will too! You are not alone.

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Thanks, all! You’ve all helped to ease some of my anxiety... as someone who suffers from anxiety.. a permanent change to my body has it through the roof!

I just keep telling myself it’s a bit of hardship to improve the rest of my life.


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I'm still in the pre-cert process, finished my 3 month waiting period. But for a revision for a RNY done 25 years ago. I've tried and failed even with the surgery so for me really needed to do something more than just going it on my own. I did my psych eval with a licensed therapist who was in network for my insurance provider who specializes in eating disorders-- the gamut, not just for folks who are overweight. I decided to continue therapy with her-- to address eating disorder issues and what I believe to be some mild depression (most likely tied to the weight, maybe). I've never gone to counseling or therapy before besides the stuff you might get with weight loss programs. We've been meeting weekly thus far. No magic bullets, still feel like we're in the getting to know you phase. She eventually suggested meeting with a bariatrician in the health system who prescribes weight loss medications, she felt like they would be a useful adjunct to my effort to try to lose weight (and keep it off if I get there) whether my surgery is approved or not. I did that and just started those this week. The bariatrician had a list of meds and we talked through the mechanism of action and which might be the best for my eating triggers/issues, she also provided a list of dietary changes, exercise plan, etc. I'll continue to meet with her for tracking. She said average/best loss with meds is 10% so doesn't get me close to where I want, but could help. She has a lot of patients who had WLS who she follows and use meds-- some til they get to goal weigh and some who have stayed on them longer term. ALL of that say I encourage you to continue exploring those other avenues and perhaps consider what other formal supports you might be able to identify (licensed counseling, support groups for accountability, etc.) that you haven't yet tried to help you be as successful as you can.

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Hey just wanted to say this is my second time in the program and I have cheated a bit too but it's ok your not going to change overnight small little baby steps that you can implement over time that stick is the best way to go. I meet with the nutritionist in like 3 1/2 weeks and I'm nervous too because this week I've gone back on old habits a bit but there's always time to improve ok just keep pushing alright we got this pm me if you want a buddy I'm always up to talk and listen ok

Sent from my SM-T380 using BariatricPal mobile app

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When you cheat you only screw over yourself, stop jumping off the wagon, use some of the commitment you had when you resolved to start on your journey. You're not hurting the surgeon, you're not hurting the surgical team, you're not even hurting the bariatric facility, just YOU. And since you're in this to help yourself to a better, healthier and thinner life, isn't cheating counter productive? Just a few home truths from your Bariatric Grandma -ME. And I'll use the age card if I have to, after all I went to High School with Mother Nature. And our guidance person was Father Time.

Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app

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I don't know about everyone else but the whole not being hungry thing is a massive incentive.

I still crave pizza and fizzy drinks like anything but I know one slice of pizza would fill me and a fizzy drink would bloat me so what's the point?

I've had a tiny sliver of cake at work and today I tries a few crisps that my brother was raving about but those tiny bits were enough.

They will be for you as well, you got to just stick with yourself.

Sent from my HTC 10 using BariatricPal mobile app

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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