Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Did your new way of life affect your family's eating habits?



Recommended Posts

I will be banded 3 weeks from today, 11/8. I have always prepared healthy meals, but my 18 y/o daughter has gained a lot of weight in the past year from eating junk that she gets at school, stopping at McD's and DQ for ice cream and eating Snacks that are really a meal. It started happening when her dad and I separated. She has asked me for help and I have shown her how to weigh, measure, keep a food diary, etc. It's getting her to continue that is difficult. She's angry with me because, in her words, now she'll be the only fat one in the house. Has anyone had the experience that others in the family are more motivated to lose weight after someone in the household has been banded? She has refused counseling to talk about her anger, which I know plays a huge part in her weight gain. I am so afraid that she'll end up as large and unhappy as I have been.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My DH's metabolism is slowing down and his rock hard abs are full fledged squishy now. I have been trying to hint to him, that he needs to eat healthier now too.. AND the fact that it's so obvious to me when I'm eating my little meals now. Sometimes he cares, especially in the beginning.. but I dunno.

We use to drink coke all day long, now he only has 1 bottle at work so it's not around to tempt me.

I won't eat fast food anymore unless in a real crunch (It's so hard to find something I can eat, AND that doesn't go over my allowed calories), so he eats fast food a lot less as well. I'm glad about that. If I'm adding years to my life, I don't want him to kill himself with all the fat either!

But really, unless they want to eat better, just because you are it won't affect them. They can eat your healthy meal, then have a lot of Snacks, a milkshake, etc. My DH seems to eat the left over of my healthy food whatever I'm having at the time.. along with his grease ball.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know you've said she has a lot of issues with food, so i won't even pretend to know how to be a parent in this situation.

But, Her situation is the same as yours, if you needed the band to lose weight and get healthier, maybe she does too. Although her head should be clear and she should maybe solve those issues before starting on that journey, have you thought about that?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hmmm, I'd have to say no, not really.

We always ate "healthy" as a family. I provide good meals for them, I dont let my kids eat crap Cereal, we never ever ever have cordial or softdrinks or even orange juice in the house, they've grown up drinking skim milk and Water, we dont eat McDonalds or takeaways like pizza apart from VERY rare occasions, and they get plenty of fruit, vegetables and good quality meat. We spend a lot more than other families on food becuase we buy good food and often organic.

But they still do get the chips, the packages snack foods etc that their peers have becuase they're kids. Two of them are normal weight, my oldest son (12) is getting quite overweight, but I'm really not sure that he isnt jsut about to have a huge pubescent growth spurt, he's going to be enormous, his feet are bigger than mine (and mine are size 10), his hands are bigger than mine and I'm not small for a woman!

But he's very inactive and he overeats quantity wise although his diet is good. I mean he plays basketball and gets lots of sport at school but in between by nature he's sedentary and can always be found inside doing something quiet. Whereas Ewan disappears after Breakfast and shows up around dinner time.

My husband overeats too - just huge quantities of food. He's obese, only just, but obese nonetheless.

So yeah, we eat good food, same food that we always did but I just eat less of it and I no longer sneak in all the crap around the sides - the cakes, muffins and coffees at the shops, the McDonalds for lunch etc

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah my husband has packed on about 30 lbs since my banding.

He must have his own meal. So instead of sharing a meal with me, I have to order my own. And he eats my leftovers, which is basically two meals.

When I told my mom I was getting the band, one of her comments was, "I wil be so jealous if you lose a bunch of weight." Yeah, she's jealous. Really jealous. Happy for me, but jealous. It definitely shows. The other day she said something to the effect of, "I am happy to take the title of fattest one in the family from you." And I believe it. I think she is happy (she always blamed herself for my weight), and I think it crushes her at the same time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes it is hard to be a Mom and human!!!!

It is such a hard place to be when someone you love and want only the best for gets it, and you get left behind. You really, truly are happy for them....but envious just the same.

Love your DD and be open to how she wants to approach this is about all I could say.

Good Luck!

Kat

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've saved so much money and my kids, a little plump, are sliming down, too.

We were big on dining out...that's cut down from 7x or more to just now 1x a week. And my meals are free as I've learned to just eat what they leave, or just 2 bites of each of theirs.

They are now taking flintsones, as I am.

No soda in the house, chips, doritos, etc.

It's been a postive experience...for the entire family.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wheetsin, that's interesting about your mother.

I really feel for my baby sister at the moment. she and I are very similar in looks and build, but she never got very fat, she always managed to keep it in control. Interesting she's now hitting the stage of life at which I got really fat as opposed to just not thin, 2 kids, bored stiff at home, no job, nothing much to do but shop, eat, have coffee, meet friends to eat and have coffee, etc etc. She's piled on probably 30 or 40lb over the last couple of years and is really starting to look hefty.

And she's not said anything to me but she has to mum about how she finds my weight loss so confronting. You get so down on yourself when you start to gain weight and get older, you feel so ugly and horrid and I know what it is to attend the family functions and feel like I'm the fat ugly one out of my two sisters and I. Now its her feeling it and my heart bleeds for her. I dont want to talk about my weight or bask in the success in front of her but everyone else brings it up, its like its STILL the main topic of conversation.

And we've got Dad's 70th on Saturday night, a formal affair and I've bought this utterly gorgeous dress and I know she's going to be in tears trying to find something to wear that actually fits (and our middle sis is truly model material, stunning), and I almost dont want to go!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×