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Am I the only one who gets annoyed by the question Why?



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On ‎2017‎-‎09‎-‎22 at 1:27 PM, SlieveMishAmy said:

I am going to be very open in the hope that it helps others. My surgeon had operated on THREE people I knew with great results. And if I hadn't observed them I might never have researched it. I hate when people say "you didn't need to do that" and I tell them that once you have gone over a certain BMI you only have a 1 or 2 % chance of losing the weight and keeping it off. It's very new science and I'm delighted to talk about it.

This is me too... I'm not shy about telling people about going for bariatric surgery (I'm still pre-op). I've seen people succeed and I've seen people struggle with the surgery, but what finally sold me on it is the fact that it puts type 2 diabetes into remission for more than 85% of surgical patients, and that's what I share when anyone asks me 'why?'. Diabetes isn't a joke, and I have 2 beautiful reasons (aged 5 and 7) to want to stick around for a good long while. I love food, but I love my family more.

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On 9/21/2017 at 9:19 AM, StephersSweet said:

Seriously though, any time you venture into the subject of WLS surgery and someone asks you why? I just get annoyed by it at this point. So I tell them I'm morbidly obese which leads to the "why don't you go to the gym, why don't you try this new diet, why would you want to do something so crazy when there are better ways to lose weight it just takes hard work?" Then I tell them about all the fad diet programs I've tried, that I go to the gym 4 times a week 1.5 hour each time alternation on strength training and cardio, which leads to more Why questions. Honestly I'm really tired of the why question, I'm all for educating the people around me but 9/10 times there questioning not because they care or want to know but because they think I'm taking the "easy way out", and that really irritates me.

So is anyone else out there sick and tired of explaining themselves?

I would let them ask and then reply "Why.... don't you mind your own business"

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I basically told everyone. First my parents and husband and best friends, and then my social media. I am not making a secret out of it, I have a blog that I share too, the writing down helps me to process what is happening and what is going on in my life now and later.

But I had the one or other strange experience. Like a friend who heard surgery and got worried but when she heard what kind she was like "oh, okay" and told me that if I had done more before I wouldn't need the 'easy road' now. Since she is someone I care about I gave her a link to learn about the surgery and told her to repeat that to me after reading this, she never did.

If it's people I don't know or don't care much about I just let them talk. As a fat girl for over 30 years I have learned at some point to let haters hate. Pick your battles and all that. Of course, sometimes it still gets to me, I'm not a machine, but it has gotten easier. My body, my choice. Easy peasy.

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7 hours ago, Chandni said:

As a fat girl for over 30 years I have learned at some point to let haters hate. Pick your battles and all that. Of course, sometimes it still gets to me, I'm not a machine, but it has gotten easier. My body, my choice. Easy peasy.

I may do things differently to you for different reasons ... but your attitude is clearly to be admired.

Thanks for sharing.

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Why lie to people if they ask?

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4 hours ago, summerset said:

Why lie to people if they ask?

I have not lied to the one person who did ask directly (just six days ago) but I did ask her not to publicise it as there are a couple of known acquaintances who are so negative about WLS that I don't want to hear their brand of grief or 5h1t over my choice.

She said that she understood. She added that she thought I had chosen wisely (to have WLS) given my history. She is a morbidly obese woman who has had to give up full-time work (i.e. take early retirement) as of ten days ago because of obesity complications and severe arthritis and joint pain.

With regard to pretty much everyone else, they see my 3+ hour days of exercise and my steady weight loss and are pleased to think I am burning it off. (Which is somewhat the case anyway!)

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I tell the type of person the OP was describing that "I'm over 50 I didn't have the time or energy for that stuff. I needed a quicker fix." Shuts them right up (and isn't really a lie).

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On 2017-09-21 at 9:19 AM, StephersSweet said:

Seriously though, any time you venture into the subject of WLS surgery and someone asks you why? I just get annoyed by it at this point. So I tell them I'm morbidly obese which leads to the "why don't you go to the gym, why don't you try this new diet, why would you want to do something so crazy when there are better ways to lose weight it just takes hard work?" Then I tell them about all the fad diet programs I've tried, that I go to the gym 4 times a week 1.5 hour each time alternation on strength training and cardio, which leads to more Why questions. Honestly I'm really tired of the why question, I'm all for educating the people around me but 9/10 times there questioning not because they care or want to know but because they think I'm taking the "easy way out", and that really irritates me.

So is anyone else out there sick and tired of explaining themselves?

Next time someone suggests you took the easy way about, just ask them what kind of idiot chooses the hard way. That is like in the movies when the heroine backs into a dark room when they hear a scary noise....who the f&#’k does that?!!! So the path on the left will be long and arduous and result in 95 percentile of failure (a statistical fact). or the path on the right may be shorter and have some obstacles but a 75% rate of long term success. Chosing the path to failure does not result in a martyrdom award in real life or really any kind of rewards...so why exactly does that make sense?

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On 2018-01-14 at 6:50 AM, summerset said:

Why lie to people if they ask?

Why is your weight or body anyone else’s business?

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I have a simple answer for me - before surgery I was on 9 different pills and a shot a day to keep my blood sugar, blood pressure, gout, and cholesterol under control. My doctor was ready to put my on insulin. Since surgery - not a single pill or shot. NOT A SINGLE ONE!! All of my numbers are normal or below normal - and have been that way since about a week after surgery. Enough said. I plan to be around to watch my son grow up and grow old with my wife...previously, I doubt I could have made that reality.

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