I don't know if I am making the right decision

[Knightsaber88 4]

My surgery date is 09/25/17, and I do not have a lot of support. I am 29 and do not have any medical conditions except for asthma and the fact that my BMI is 44. My parents feel like I should not have to be "cut open" in order to lose weight, but they do not understand my every day struggle. My dietician (outside of the bariatric program) reminds me that if I get this surgery I can possibly develop esophageal cancer because you apparently get GERD after gastric sleeve. I only have one supportive friend, and she's sad because she feels like I'm going to become a different person because of hormones and that i won't be able to drink anymore. I just support from someone and some assurance that I am making the right decision. I don't want to die and I don't want to regret this surgery and develop more diseases as a result of this surgery. Is this worth it? Did anyone have regrets?

[Walter.Sobchak 978]

I was just sleeved 8 days ago, it has been hard but I have no regrets yet.
Your friend that is afraid of losing you as a drinking buddy doesn't sound like a very good friend.
I am surprised your parents don't support you, would they rather see you unhappy and obese?
It basically comes down to what you want to do.
Don't let other people's selfish reasons deter you from getting it.

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

[YeaMe 246]

I had my gastrologist and my surgeon confer because I had really bad GERD, had Barrett's, which is pre-cancer cells (which I had been treated for and have been clean of for three years). In addition, I had a hiatal hernia. We weighed all the options and the risks. My surgeon recommended the bypass, which I would not have done. Why? A good friend had a bypass and she constantly dumps, is as pale as a ghost, 80% of her hair has fallen out and she just looks sickly all the time. My gastrologist cleared me for the sleeve. The issue with the sleeve and esophageal cancer is one way to remove the cancer is they have to cut out the cancerous portion and pull up the stomach to meet the healthy esophagus. Since they remove a lot of your stomach, there won't be enough stomach to pull up. Someone may think I'm crazy for having the procedure done, but I have committed to yearly scoping and to stay away from the triggers.

Not everyone develops GERD who has the gastric sleeve. You just have to be diligent and follow your surgeon's plan - most have you taking something for the acid for the first 3-6 month. At my six month check up they told me to stop taking my ppi. I'll admit, I was terrified. Before surgery if I didn't take it I couldn't even drink Water. I weaned myself off of it and I have had zero problems and have never felt better.

I do believe a lot of it had to do with my diet change - no eating until I'm stuffed, minimal alcohol, no diet cokes, no chocolate or sweets, no fried foods, minimal spicy foods. Also, I quit eating after 7:00 p.m. Of course the huge weight loss helps a lot too.

I only told one friend about the surgery. Has my life changed? Absolutely! My entertainment isn't going out eating and drinking anymore. I thought I would be sad about it but I have found other things to do now. Hiking, biking, gym, kayaking, which are way more fun than eating and drinking and you feel good after doing them.

Is this surgery worth it?!?!?!? A-B-S-O-L-U-T-E-L-Y! My regret, as many others will say, is I didn't do it sooner.

[Knightsaber88 4]

I was just sleeved 8 days ago, it has been hard but I have no regrets yet.
Your friend that is afraid of losing you as a drinking buddy doesn't sound like a very good friend.
I am surprised your parents don't support you, would they rather see you unhappy and obese?
It basically comes down to what you want to do.
Don't let other people's selfish reasons deter you from getting it.

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

My family thinks that I look fine and that I should simply exercise and eat less. I want to get this surgery and I'm ready to overcome the difficulty of first stages of surgery. It is hard enough being obese and feeling like a prisoner in my skin. I have a lot of girls nights with my friends where we drink wine so it will be sad not to be able to drink again. Thank you for your support!


Sent from my SM-G935T using BariatricPal mobile app

[YeaMe 246]

Just now, Knightsaber88 said:

My family thinks that I look fine and that I should simply exercise and eat less. I want to get this surgery and I'm ready to overcome the difficulty of first stages of surgery. It is hard enough being obese and feeling like a prisoner in my skin. I have a lot of girls nights with my friends where we drink wine so it will be sad not to be able to drink again. Thank you for your support!


Sent from my SM-G935T using BariatricPal mobile app

I have a ton of girl's nights out. I didn't not go out for the first 3 1/2 months to get myself on track, and frankly, had no desire to because I was so focused on my plan. I realized I had the rest of my life to go out. Now, I go out frequently. I don't necessarily drink each time, but if I do, I will order a glass of white wine, or vodka/cranberry. I limit myself to one because of the empty calories, and I have it before I put any food in my stomach so I'm not eating and drinking. One thing you will find, that can sabotage you, is when you are a little buzzed you will be looser on your food choices.

Believe me, I was a 4-6 drink person when I went out. I've been saving a ton of money because I now have 1 to zero drinks, and always split a meal with someone.

You have to make a commitment to yourself that it is what you really want. If you do, it makes it a lot easier to comply.

[Knightsaber88 4]

This is really assuring![emoji28] I love kayaking, but always worrying about sinking the boat because of my weight. Thank you so much for your words. I've only told one friend as well, the one that's sad about losing a drinking buddy.


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[YeaMe 246]

1 minute ago, Knightsaber88 said:

This is really assuring! I love kayaking, but always worrying about sinking the boat because of my weight. Thank you so much for your words. I've only told one friend as well, the one that's sad about losing a drinking buddy.


Sent from my SM-G935T using BariatricPal mobile app

Well, she will be losing a drinking buddy. But, she can now be your walking buddy.

I told my daughter I was going to have to find all new friends because I knew my lifestyle would greatly change. Two of my friends are encouraged by my weight loss and will walk with me and another friend bought a bike and we go cycling. So, I am converting them all slowly to my lifestyle. Yeah, I did loose a few, but I'm okay with that. I pick me!

[Marblicious 130]

Hey Knightsaber88, I don't know what your current weight is and I can only share my story. I struggled with my weight all my life, gradually gaining and gaining and at 53 years old I found myself weight 168kgs. As you get older things start to go wrong, blood pressure starts to go up, you become more at risk of diabetes, the ongoing weight means you are at risk of several different cancers. cholesterol and all sorts of other problems. I can't say you should do it but I can say it was the right decision for me. Only you can make the decision and if you are not getting the support you need. I suggest you speak to a psychologist or councellor as well as your doctor before you decide.

Here is some of the plusses for me:

[Tarno3 19]

My family thinks that I look fine and that I should simply exercise and eat less. I want to get this surgery and I'm ready to overcome the difficulty of first stages of surgery. It is hard enough being obese and feeling like a prisoner in my skin. I have a lot of girls nights with my friends where we drink wine so it will be sad not to be able to drink again. Thank you for your support!


Sent from my SM-G935T using BariatricPal mobile app

I'm almost 6 months out from RNY and literally so happy I made this decision.

I'm 25 and my parents had said the same thing. They love me but elective surgery is a scary thing for a parent to support for their child. When I told the chances of me losing in my own and keeping it off after a lifting of obesity they were still skeptical. Now my parents are 100% supportive

The drinking part or not drinking part is hard socially. My friend had the surgery and drank about 8 months out, she just gets completely **** faced after one glass of wine and her drink choices changed. It's suppose to be one year with out alcohol, if you can't do that you might want to think about your life. It's weird socially eating out / drinking at first but you'll fall into a routine


Seminar 12/27/16: wt 304
Surgery 3/23: wt 287
3 months post op : 236

[Nycole 81 11]

18 hours ago, Knightsaber88 said:

My surgery date is 09/25/17, and I do not have a lot of support. I am 29 and do not have any medical conditions except for asthma and the fact that my BMI is 44. My parents feel like I should not have to be "cut open" in order to lose weight, but they do not understand my every day struggle. My dietician (outside of the bariatric program) reminds me that if I get this surgery I can possibly develop esophageal cancer because you apparently get GERD after gastric sleeve. I only have one supportive friend, and she's sad because she feels like I'm going to become a different person because of hormones and that i won't be able to drink anymore. I just support from someone and some assurance that I am making the right decision. I don't want to die and I don't want to regret this surgery and develop more diseases as a result of this surgery. Is this worth it? Did anyone have regrets?

I just had my surgery 9-6-17 my starting BMI was 42 I am 35 I was 304 when I decided I wanted more of a life and it was time to get healthy. I am not on any medications but my blood pressure has been watched because its starting to go up, I didn't want to wait until it got worse. I told 5 people because I didn't want other peoples opinions to influence my decision. I had the sleeve procedure and its been three days I had minor complications with a two day stay in the hospital. I don't regret it. I wont regret struggling to tie my shoes, worrying how much a car sighs and if the shocks will hold as I climb in. Lack of breath climbing a flight of stairs , back and knee aches. I have lost 8 lbs in 4 days feel free to message me if you want to talk.

[dreamingsmall 1,125]

This is about YOU. Not your friend. She is being selfish thinking about losing a drinking buddy, rather than gaining a buddy with renewed health even if you have no health conditions your reducing your risk of some , maybe she will come around. I know its hard not to take others opinions on board, especially when its a mix of concern/love/fear of change from your love ones or whatever it may be.

Regarding your parents, lucky you are an adult, so its not their choice, I understand they are concerned so perhaps give them some leaflets lol. But keep your mind focused , no one can say if this is right for you or not , but for me.. I

I wish I had some advice, but I only told my mum as she is the only opinion I am concerned about. I was worried and scared on my own I did not want peoples opinions to cloud my choice. I have no regrets so far. My surgeon did not highlight the increased risk of cancer, so I will look into it . Thanks

[KateBruin 344]

My surgery date is 09/25/17, and I do not have a lot of support. I am 29 and do not have any medical conditions except for asthma and the fact that my BMI is 44. My parents feel like I should not have to be "cut open" in order to lose weight, but they do not understand my every day struggle. My dietician (outside of the bariatric program) reminds me that if I get this surgery I can possibly develop esophageal cancer because you apparently get GERD after gastric sleeve. I only have one supportive friend, and she's sad because she feels like I'm going to become a different person because of hormones and that i won't be able to drink anymore. I just support from someone and some assurance that I am making the right decision. I don't want to die and I don't want to regret this surgery and develop more diseases as a result of this surgery. Is this worth it? Did anyone have regrets?

I'm about 2 1/2 weeks post op and 31. Dad and stepmom support me but they're across the country. I live with my mom (baby sister died 2 yrs ago so she's a trainwreck). She fully voiced how she was against surgery and how stupid it was and permanent and will f**k up my life. Saying I'm too young (younger the better in my book) and not heavy enough (didn't look it but BMI was 40). I was pre-diabetic, intermittent hypertension plus an awful rare lung disease and ankylosing spondylitis. Surgery should help everything, even just a little.

I decided the small risks are worth essentially saving my life and increasing the quality of it. I haven't even dated since 2009.

I currently have some GERD but if I sit up during meals and for a little after it's manageable. My doc requires all patients take a proton pump inhibitor like Prilosec for 90 days post op because (I think) most or many develop temporary GERD. If you continue to have it there's always sleeve to bypass revision.

Eventually you can drink but your cocktail choices will be smaller and you'll drink less. In a month or two I look forward to a vodka with no calorie mixer.

If you have no support right now, find it. Therapist, support group, whatever. I actually met a woman through this forum and we text. She's just about to start the 3 month pre-op journey and has been there for me post op.

Holy crap that was long winded. I'm taking a break from a meal with my dog whining for food.

If you ever want to chat, message me!

[KateBruin 344]

I had my gastrologist and my surgeon confer because I had really bad GERD, had Barrett's, which is pre-cancer cells (which I had been treated for and have been clean of for three years). In addition, I had a hiatal hernia. We weighed all the options and the risks. My surgeon recommended the bypass, which I would not have done. Why? A good friend had a bypass and she constantly dumps, is as pale as a ghost, 80% of her hair has fallen out and she just looks sickly all the time. My gastrologist cleared me for the sleeve. The issue with the sleeve and esophageal cancer is one way to remove the cancer is they have to cut out the cancerous portion and pull up the stomach to meet the healthy esophagus. Since they remove a lot of your stomach, there won't be enough stomach to pull up. Someone may think I'm crazy for having the procedure done, but I have committed to yearly scoping and to stay away from the triggers.
Not everyone develops GERD who has the gastric sleeve. You just have to be diligent and follow your surgeon's plan - most have you taking something for the acid for the first 3-6 month. At my six month check up they told me to stop taking my ppi. I'll admit, I was terrified. Before surgery if I didn't take it I couldn't even drink Water. I weaned myself off of it and I have had zero problems and have never felt better.
I do believe a lot of it had to do with my diet change - no eating until I'm stuffed, minimal alcohol, no diet cokes, no chocolate or sweets, no fried foods, minimal spicy foods. Also, I quit eating after 7:00 p.m. Of course the huge weight loss helps a lot too.
I only told one friend about the surgery. Has my life changed? Absolutely! My entertainment isn't going out eating and drinking anymore. I thought I would be sad about it but I have found other things to do now. Hiking, biking, gym, kayaking, which are way more fun than eating and drinking and you feel good after doing them.
Is this surgery worth it?!?!?!? A-B-S-O-L-U-T-E-L-Y! My regret, as many others will say, is I didn't do it sooner.

I allow myself 1 Diet Coke a day. Started around 10 days post op after tons of research. It's my kryptonite. I pop a can, leave it in the fridge for about 3 min and just drink it slow. Lots of burps. 100% worth it!

[PrayingForWeightLoss 340]

I am obese and had a BMI of 41 with no diagnosed health issues at the time of my surgery. I got sleeved July 28, 2017 because I knew it was a matter of time before I got diagnosed with serious health issues. As a clinician myself, I knew what was waiting for me Healthwise. Your parents are voicing their opinion from a place of concern and I can understand their fears. However, you have to consider your personal circumstances in making this decision. With regards to that dietician's opinion, that is just that, an opinion. Does she have data to support her claims? Sit down with a bariatric surgeon to get more information and make a medically informed decision. Hope all goes well for you.

[MBird 298]

My surgery date is 09/25/17, and I do not have a lot of support. I am 29 and do not have any medical conditions except for asthma and the fact that my BMI is 44. My parents feel like I should not have to be "cut open" in order to lose weight, but they do not understand my every day struggle. My dietician (outside of the bariatric program) reminds me that if I get this surgery I can possibly develop esophageal cancer because you apparently get GERD after gastric sleeve. I only have one supportive friend, and she's sad because she feels like I'm going to become a different person because of hormones and that i won't be able to drink anymore. I just support from someone and some assurance that I am making the right decision. I don't want to die and I don't want to regret this surgery and develop more diseases as a result of this surgery. Is this worth it? Did anyone have regrets?

NONE. Thank god I did it and I wish I did it sooner. Your dietician is a nitwit and your parents and friends are extremely unsupportive and NOT living in your body or mind, so screw them! Do what you want for you.

This is your life, take control OR continue to gain weight and get bigger and have WAY worse issues down the line.

F the naysayers and doubting Thomases! Take life by the balls and make it happen for you. Imagine all the good years you will have full of energy and great health. And if your friend falls off the planet because she can't handle the new confidence and energy level, so what! You'll make more [emoji6]

You have my support!