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Struggling day to day



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Hello I am 2 years out haven't reached goal yet. Not sure if I will but I am working hard to get back on track. It's just hard because I want to take care of everyone first still. I feel guilty not taking care of others. I know I should not feel this way I don't have real support at home for the simple reason they do understand. Being an addict of food is the same as being an addict of anything. They just do not get it. I ask please do not bring cakes, ice cream donuts, you know all the stuff that got me to nearly 500 pounds only for it to fall upon deaf ears. I'm hoping to friend the support I so desperately need. Thanks for reading...

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about the second time you start throwing that stuff in the trash they will get the hint.

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Well I decided that anyone who brings that crap in the house will not find in the trash can you are right. I cleaned out the cupboards yesterday and my neighbor was one happy camper. From this day forward this is all about me .... thanks for you kind words

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Why is it that mom's feel guilty if we're even thinking about doing something for ourselves? I have officially gotten over that:-). I am the shopper in my home so what comes in is all up to me. If junk gets through my door it better be eaten quick or it will disappear. Honestly!

I am nearly 5 months post op so I'm still pretty honeymoon about it. But at this point my family likes the person I've become so appealing to them for understanding is pretty easy. I guess they are also in the honeymoon stage:-/

i still allow some things as my teen-aged son and husband with ravenous appetites and no weight problems need calories. So I practice resisting. I have introduced a few things back into my home and intentionally resisted. I don't beat myself up about it. Things I'm proud to resist are ice cream, crackers, tortilla chips... that doesn't mean I don't eat it. I resist it. Example: if I think about the ice cream in the fridge I resist. But when my son has a bowl I ask him to serve me a bowl with three tablespoons and savor every spoonful and log it in my journal. I want to build a healthy relationship with food.

At two years out nobody has to tell you how to eat or how to get over your addiction. You know the plan. You have to find that mojo within yourself that moved you in the direction of WLS. Food addiction sucks but you have a great tool to help you get it under control.

Take care

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Hi Pam thanks for your thoughts I respect where you are coming from. However, addiction is different for each person as well triggers. Not everyone is as strong as you are. I am very happy you have the strength you do and I hope to find it as well .

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On 6/23/2017 at 1:28 PM, Pam_2-06-2017 said:

Why is it that mom's feel guilty if we're even thinking about doing something for ourselves? I have officially gotten over that:-). I am the shopper in my home so what comes in is all up to me. If junk gets through my door it better be eaten quick or it will disappear. Honestly!

I am nearly 5 months post op so I'm still pretty honeymoon about it. But at this point my family likes the person I've become so appealing to them for understanding is pretty easy. I guess they are also in the honeymoon stage:-/

i still allow some things as my teen-aged son and husband with ravenous appetites and no weight problems need calories. So I practice resisting. I have introduced a few things back into my home and intentionally resisted. I don't beat myself up about it. Things I'm proud to resist are ice cream, crackers, tortilla chips... that doesn't mean I don't eat it. I resist it. Example: if I think about the ice cream in the fridge I resist. But when my son has a bowl I ask him to serve me a bowl with three tablespoons and savor every spoonful and log it in my journal. I want to build a healthy relationship with food.

At two years out nobody has to tell you how to eat or how to get over your addiction. You know the plan. You have to find that mojo within yourself that moved you in the direction of WLS. food addiction sucks but you have a great tool to help you get it under control.

Take care

I have to agree with @Pam_2-06-2017. You have to find the strength and perseverance within yourself to do what you need to do to reach your goals. It's as simple as that. My partner lost 115 pounds from February 2016 until December 2016. That time period was my six month pre-op diet program and three months of post-op life. He got to his goal of 200 pounds (he's 6'1"). At that time (end of December 2016), I weighed about 250ish, and still had a ways to go to get to my goal. Since then, he has eaten what he wants (and gained some weight back, too). Crap is in the house all of the time. He wants fast food, so we go through a drive-thru. You know what? I buy it at the store for him. I hand him the credit card in the drive-thru line. I hold the ice-cream cone while he gets situated in the car. But I don't eat any of it, because I know that isn't what I am supposed to do.

The mental part of this game (whether it is pre-op, immediately post-op, or 2 years out) is the hardest part, and where the war is won. I wish you the best as you continue. I'd recommend working with a psychologist and/or a nutritionist to help you get re-started. Having an experienced person to talk to often really helps.

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It isn't easy. Ever. But I am glad I get to restart every morning and say today is going to be a good day full of self control. So far I've only had 2 days where I fell and ate foods that I shouldn't have. I'm only 3.5 weeks out so I anticipate those will happen from time to time. Both things happened on the same day. The next day I brushed myself off and started over making sure to get my fluids and Protein in. I know that there are foods I just can't have around- others aren't a problem. pizza and pie are the 2 that just can't happen for me. But ice cream, chips, soda. candy so far I haven't even been tempted yet. I'm sure as I become more active and lose more weight I'll have other motivations for sticking with it as well. And I have you all here to pull me through it. Thanks!


Hw 223, SW 217 CW 200 GW 135

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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