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Decision To Make --Yes and Scared



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Hello- I am new. I need to hear from those who have done this. I am in the pre-op stage -waiting insurance VSG approval. I have a BMI 35 and told not to drop any weight. I am still trying to ensure I am making right decision. My questions are below:

1. Many people in my life, especially my own family, would think of it as a failure to resort to such measures. I am not telling anyone I am having WLS except my husband. Is it possible to keep it from my family, co-workers, & friends long-term?

2. Hard to find published research with longtern results because it is still relatively new and often patients eventually stop following up with center/surgeon. What is it like for those who are 5-10 years out?

3. I plan to only take a week to recover. Surgery on Wed and back to work week later on following Thursday and Friday. I am a College Professor & Nurse Practitioner. How is the fatigue? manageable? I have had Laparoscopic surgery so I know what that feels like.

4. How easy is it to gain weight after sleeve? Does it seem to come on faster for any reason?

5. I know there is the window of 12-18 months to make use of tool. 3 or more years out you will be able to consume more food than 1/4-1/2 cup. Lets say 1 cup. Could you at this point eat normal but watching your calories and carbs? For example, eat healthy meal and have a small piece of dessert on occasions within that 1 cup?

Thanks

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There's a lot to unpack in this post.

First, let's talk about your screen name, "hatemyreflection". That jumped out at me because I used to feel the same way. One of the ways I got past that was to stop telling myself that. Beating yourself up doesn't help you lose weight. It just makes you feel bad. Consider a new screen name more fitting of your new direction.

Tell the haters that the real failure would be not addressing your weight & dying before you should.

Is it possible to keep visible weight loss from people long term? No. Nor should it be. Don't hide it, Celebrate it! Show it off! I'm nearly 3 years post surgery & in all this time, I only found one person who had a negative reaction to it. Ironically, she needed WLS surgery too.

You plan to take a week to recover? That's nice. If you're a nurse practitioner, you know sometimes people recover quickly & sometimes they take longer. Be kind to yourself & take as much time as you need.

Regaining weight is unique to every person. Some people do it easily, some keep it off for longer. If there was a magic formula that worked for everyone, we'd all use it.

Careful of the term "eat normal". You're going to have a new normal. Then another new normal. Then another.

I know this is your first post & you have lots of questions. Good! Keep asking. But be prepared to leave some preconceptions behind.

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Everything DaleCruse said is so right! I'm afraid I can't speak to long-term results because I only just reached a month post-surgery, but my father-in-law (who has been awesomely supportive) had a bypass with my surgeon a little over 10 years ago and has done very well.

I was also worried that people would see this as the "easy way out" and that I was failure for needing surgery or just too lazy to "do things the right way". It turns out, that was really all in my own head. Those were my own doubts that I was projecting onto people who love and care about me. I haven't had a single negative reaction, and if anyone felt otherwise they had to the good sense to keep it to themselves. And honestly, just telling people made the whole thing so much easier. Things get hard to hide. There will be points where even before surgery you're eating tiny portions or nothing but liquids - people notice. After surgery, in those first few weeks, weight just sort of falls off quickly. Even if you don't see it in the mirror, they will. My coworkers asked me a million questions every step of the way - not because they were nosy, but because they care about me. They wanted to know what to expect so they could know how to help and support. It felt amazing.

I'm 27 and have an office job and I expected to take a week off. I ended up just a little bit over at 10 days because I ended up feeling incredibly fatigued. I tend to have low Iron to begin with so between surgery and getting my period for the first time in years - I just wanted to hibernate. It could be totally different for you.

Eating stuff... I can't really do more than 1/4 to 1/3 cup at a sitting right now, which is totally normal. I'll work up to 1/2 cup over time and eventually, a small meal. My father in law usually doesn't finish a full plate, but what he does eat would still be a healthy, balanced portion size.

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