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Getting cold feet all of a sudden



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So my surgery is in 5 days....I'm having gastric bypass and out of nowhere I'm having second thoughts. I've looked up every horror story possible so I'm freaking out because of that. I keep looking up malnutrition and wondering if I should've chose the sleeve to prevent dying from that. Not sure if I should go through the with this. I'm 380lbs as of today, started at 405 a couple months ago (my process was fast as my insurance had no 3 or 6 month requirements) I have pcos and I'm 30. Nothing else wrong but I know I'm headed there. Not sure what to do....any happy thoughts to share?

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This is totally normal. And it's very likely that the first 3 weeks or so, you will regret doing it. I am 6 weeks out and it was so hard at first and I regretted it. Everyone said it gets better. And guess what, it does. However, if you feel that you are not emotionally or psychologically ready, then just put it on hold. It's ok. You don't have to do it right now. Maybe you need more time. Either way I am sure you will make a great decision that you will be happy about! Good luck!



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Its normal! I think everyone thinks about the what ifs, hows and whys before surgery. Especially near to the date of surgery.

If you do need more time to decide between the sleeve and bypass, then I am sure your team would be able to support you with your decision, which is a huge one to make. I had one 20 minute 'omg what have I done' on day three when I was still in Hospital after the VSG. The other 18 months have been great. My only regret is not doing it sooner. Be kind to yourself xx

Kate

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I'm still pre-op. I'm getting RNY in April. I've done the same thing you did. I looked up horror stories, but I also looked up stories that weren't so horrible. There were more good stories than bad ones and usually the good outweighs the bad. Although I did look up horror stories it didn't change my mind. I asked myself "Is this what you really want?" It is. My desire for health and longevity outweighed my fears.

Just ask yourself if this is something you truly want right now, look at the pros and cons and ask yourself if you're ready. Sometimes things take a good amount of pep talk.


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That's the bad thing about the internet..you can always find the bad. I had checked into doing the surgery 15 years ago and backed out cause I knew at the time I wasn't ready. I felt like I hadn't exhausted all means of getting my weight under control. I had my gastric by pass 1/30/17 and I have no regrets. As a nurse I took care of post op gastric patients. I knew the bad up close and personal. But i refused to let that deter me. The day of my surgery I knew this was my last hope. I did it for pure unselfish reasons. I have a sick child who has a very long road ahead of him and I knew I wouldn't be around to help him through what lies ahead of him if I didn't get healthy. My fear wasn't of my weight killing me...my fear was of it killing me before I could help my child through the tough times that lie ahead. If you're having doubts then I suggest you hold off. Maybe just postpone. Trust me when you decide one way or another you'll know. With every Fiber if it's the right thing for you. This is your chapter...your life. Only you can decide sweetie what the next chapter brings. Just don't let fear be your guide. I wish you the best.... [emoji846]


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The percentages of complications are pretty low for RNY. As for dying of malnutrition, that's highly unlikely unless you fail to take your bariatric Vitamins, Iron and B12 and don't get the prescribed amount of Protein and fluids. You can decide not to go through with it now and then suffer the consequences of carrying that much weight on your frame for the next 25 years. My consequences were arthritis in my back, knees, neck and hip, high blood pressure and pre-diabetes. Arthritis joint damage doesn't ever go away - the cartilage in my knees won't grow back. Losing 100 pounds so far has made the pain in all those areas much better but I will still never run, ski, or do jumping jacks again. I'm no longer pre-diabetic and my blood pressure is better as well though I still take 1 medication. I only wish I had had this surgery 10 or 20 years ago before all the damage had been done.

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Yes so normal, the day off my surgery i turned the car around twice to go back home lol.. i am almost 6 weeks out the first 2-3 wks you will feel regret bc everyone around you are eating normal, but once your body gets used to everything and you start soft foods youll be fine. I dont regret a thing, and i am 46lbs down!



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Thanks so much everyone!! I calmed down, I was having a freak out moment. Im calm now lol. Im still having the gastric bypass on Thursday, 3 more days. Im nervous but I know the complications that can come with staying at the weight I am now are far worse to live with, I feel like Im lucky to not have as many issues at my weight that others have. Im having it done at the most prominent hospital in my state, which is also certified by that one surgeon board ( I forget the name) so I know I am in good hands. Thank you for all your kind words!!

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You have to take the same supplements and Vitamin with sleeve as you do with bypass.I had sleeve in 2011,then developed acid reflux issues and revision 2016.Some people have problems but not all.Every surgery comes with its own risk.I wish I would of had the bypass to begin with,but I was afraid of complications too.

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Thanks so much everyone!! I calmed down, I was having a freak out moment. Im calm now lol. Im still having the gastric bypass on Thursday, 3 more days. Im nervous but I know the complications that can come with staying at the weight I am now are far worse to live with, I feel like Im lucky to not have as many issues at my weight that others have. Im having it done at the most prominent hospital in my state, which is also certified by that one surgeon board ( I forget the name) so I know I am in good hands. Thank you for all your kind words!!

I think its normal to have moments where one wonders if this is the best thing for them, but onlybyou know that answer. The surgery is only a tool, the successful results of the surgery are all dependent on your choices. You can do it :)



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My suggestion is to stay focused on what brought you this far in the process. Have you looked at how you feel now? Have you looked at the accommodations that you make in life at your current weight? Are you happy now?

I had the same feelings and they even surfaced the morning of surgery as well. While driving to the hospital I thought to myself, I can't believe I'm driving myself to this procedure. Reality is God has been with me every step of the way and it has been life changing.

Keep the focus and remember we have to accept all the positives and all the potential negatices.

Cheers to you!!


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It's perfectly normal to have second thoughts! But don't read all the horror stories!! It'll just freak u out. You need the surgery to get control of your eating and improve your quality of life. Good luck! The surgery is worth it from my experience.


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    • LeighaTR

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      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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