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I cannot decide if I should do this or not



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So, hi! I'm brand new here. I'm gathering information. I've been to the sleeve seminar, called my insurance, and have my first appointment on Tuesday. I go back and forth about this surgery almost hourly. I am prediabetic, prehypertensive, probably have sleep apnea, have GERD, PCOS, joint problems, and other things. My BMI is 42. I apparently can't lose any more than 10 pounds during this process or my insurance won't approve it. So I can't even try to lose on my own or else I'll have to start over. The earliest I could have the surgery is mid July. I'm scared of after surgery. I'm scared of complications. I'm scared of regretting it. I'm also scared of losing 2/3 of a major, vital organ. I'm very scared of the health problems that I'm headed for if I don't do this. This isn't really about what I look like - I don't want to have a heart attack in front of my kids. I don't want to die. But I also don't want to have a lifetime of complications from the surgery.

I'm not good at decisions.

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It sounds like without the surgery you are headed down the same road most everyone here was on too. I hope you make the right decision for you, but I can tell you I'm super happy with my results. It literally changed my life. I made the right decision for me... I trust you'll make the right one for you.


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I had similar background...high blood pressure, apnea, cholesterol and pre diabetic when I finally made the decision. After years of struggling with weight, I did not want to die of a heart attack and not be there for my wife and especially my kids.

The surgery is not a quick decision to make, and remember, it is only a tool to help change your lifestyle and improve your health.

I am now two weeks post surgery, feeling great and already prior meds have been cut in half. I go for sleep test in late March and god willing, will no longer need CPAP.

This was my experience, I wish you all the best while making yours.

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Only you can make this decision.

That said, I had a similar health history as you and started at a similar BMI.

My thinking in the risk of surgery is that it was exactly that - a risk - versus the certainty of the health consequences of continuing on the path I was on.

I also struggled with whether I would regret it. I like food. I used food as a coping mechanism. Food was tied to all my favorite things. I had to get over that. I still struggle with it.

But my BMI is 28 now, and my health is great. I thinking about taking up rock climbing. My life is really great right now because I had the surgery. It's not always easy, but no regrets.

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Only you can make this decision.

That said, I had a similar health history as you and started at a similar BMI.

My thinking in the risk of surgery is that it was exactly that - a risk - versus the certainty of the health consequences of continuing on the path I was on.

I also struggled with whether I would regret it. "

I like [mention=297401]ryan_86[/mention] what you brought up about food is completely how I feel. food has become our entertainment, my comfort, my relaxer, all of that. I need to find something to replace that addiction.

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I just had my surgery on monday. I came home from the hospital yesterday and I was a little emotional yesterday, second guessing my decision and feeling an emptiness?? Emotionally better today, physically I don't feel bad at all. Trying to keep moving.

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I'm 10 days post op. I'll be honest, I didn't expect the pain to be this painful. It gets better everyday but emotionally, I'm sick of being weak from the surgery. It's a huge & life changing decision only you can decide for yourself. Even though I'm sort of emotionally drained, I've already lost 20 lbs since the liquid pre-op diet. I could never lose even that much weight before. If I could, I wouldn't have gotten the surgery. But in your condition, this will be a positive result for you since you need to lose weight. Ask yourself can you do it on your own by sticking to a strict diet or am I willing to go to the extreme with surgery? Complications are low according to statistics I've read. My hospital has 0 fatalities with weight loss surgery.


Height 5'0"
Weight for WLS consultation: 216 lbs.
Surgery date: 2/13/17
Goal: - 71 lbs for healthy BMI (about 145 lbs).
Current weight: 194.4 lbs
My profile picture is not me. It's my "FitSpiration" body.

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The "what ifs" can be so scary. The fear of the unknown...

But, we don't know our future either way. The surgery is unknown and whether or not issues will arise and also NOT doing anything is unknown. Either way, you need to decide for yourself. Both are a choice.

Personally, I chose the risk for the hopeful reward. Doing something for my health in a positive way was the best choice for me.

This is not a quick fix or an easy road. You will still have to work at it every day. I had complications in the beginning that landed me back in the hospital for an additional week. I then had a wicked round of nausea that lasted for about a month and half. Things can happen and they can be awful but they can be that way if you choose not to have the surgery.

I am the healthiest I have ever been and am able to run, hike and actually participate in life. Once you decide, time will seem to stand still but then afterwards, it will fly by!! Best wishes for you!




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So, hi! I'm brand new here. I'm gathering information. I've been to the sleeve seminar, called my insurance, and have my first appointment on Tuesday. I go back and forth about this surgery almost hourly. I am prediabetic, prehypertensive, probably have sleep apnea, have GERD, PCOS, joint problems, and other things. My BMI is 42. I apparently can't lose any more than 10 pounds during this process or my insurance won't approve it. So I can't even try to lose on my own or else I'll have to start over. The earliest I could have the surgery is mid July. I'm scared of after surgery. I'm scared of complications. I'm scared of regretting it. I'm also scared of losing 2/3 of a major, vital organ. I'm very scared of the health problems that I'm headed for if I don't do this. This isn't really about what I look like - I don't want to have a heart attack in front of my kids. I don't want to die. But I also don't want to have a lifetime of complications from the surgery.

I'm not good at decisions.




If you have gerd, most surgeons will advise against the sleeve. Gerd gets worse for many.



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If you have gerd, most surgeons will advise against the sleeve. Gerd gets worse for many.




I don't know that this is correct. At the seminar I went to, he said GERD would be much improved. I will ask when I go to my appt n


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I don't know that this is correct. At the seminar I went to, he said GERD would be much improved. I will ask when I go to my appt n



Keep researching. Heres what my surgeon said when i went to my first consult and?wanted the sleeve. I told him I had gerd for years. He said, "what I have been seei g with the sleeve, about 1/3 of sleeve patients will have gerd following the sleeve peocedure. But what Im seeing is?the 4 to 5 months out patients have severe gerd and end up having a revision to RNY". I myself refuse to chance it. At 58 im not having 2 surgeries. Best of luck to you.



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If you aren't sure then you shouldn't have surgery.

You should have a clear idea that surgery is for you, it is your best option and it is going to save your life.

Knowing that surgery is your best and only option makes getting through the hard times easier. It makes resisting food easier.

You will have fewer regrets in the long run.

You posted you are emotionally attached to food, you need to work that out before surgery or once you can't self medicate/comfort with food you will be miserable. It is like going cold turkey off heroin. You can't self soothe with food post-op at least not immediately and if you are not in a good mental space with food you will be tempted to advance your food stages and put yourself in danger or you will just be miserable and full of regret.

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    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

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