Friend found out

[SimiStar 37]

I'm a private person. Only my immediate family knew I had surgery. I do not currently have either of my best friends living with me in the state, one is coming home in the spring.

I chose not to tell them anything. Mostly because I'm private and this surgery to me is a private matter. I went and created new social media accounts a YouTube channel and Instagram. So I feel comfortable sharing my story with this community but not to the outside world.

I didn't have my Instagram set to private and one of my friends found it and called me out asking for information. I don't know how to react. I don't want to respond or share anything but if I don't then I'm going to cause distance. I've since blocked her... pretending like nothin ever happened lol

So tell me someone else has these stupid anxieties and tell me what advice you have even if it means sucking it up being open.

Ranting and raving !

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[Pescador 1,374]

Well my old husband decided no one would know our business about surgery and no one questioned us. Therefore there isn't anything to defend. It is pathetic that gossipmongers stick their nose in. I say ignore. Not her business. Most of us have hernias, so maybe you have a hernia,

[Icantbelieveit 955]

Im super private. What was on your ig?

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[blizair09 3,250]

How long have you been friends with this person? Will blocking her cause irreparable harm to your friendship?

[SimiStar 37]

Im super private. What was on your ig?

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@Slimsim_vsg

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[SimiStar 37]

How long have you been friends with this person? Will blocking her cause irreparable harm to your friendship?

For like 10 years one of my best friends. But she's now several states away we only get to see each other once or twice a year.

I just blocked her from my Wls Instagram as soon as I saw she followed me. So it's lame cause obviously she saw things. I changed the profile to private so that can be avoided.

Now I feel like I have to talk about with her when I'm not ready to do that.

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[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,443]

Now I feel like I have to talk about with her when I'm not ready to do that.

That's what you tell her -- simple, honest, to the point. Don't make it bigger or deeper or worse than it is. You don't even know if she's been back to your instagram to know that she's now locked out.

[nh-vsgirl 102]

(I just requested to follow you ) I don't blame you for eving weirded out about her finding you, it's your story to tell a d your choice who knows and who doesn't . I'm only in the beginning and someone found out my plans That I wasn't planning on telling so I'm pretty pissed already !

happy Llama sad Llama... big fat mama Llama.

[Fredbear 397]

I'm having a hard time reconciling "I'm a super private person" and "I created a public account to show pictures of myself to the world ".

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

[blizair09 3,250]

How long have you been friends with this person? Will blocking her cause irreparable harm to your friendship?

For like 10 years one of my best friends. But she's now several states away we only get to see each other once or twice a year.

I just blocked her from my Wls Instagram as soon as I saw she followed me. So it's lame cause obviously she saw things. I changed the profile to private so that can be avoided.

Now I feel like I have to talk about with her when I'm not ready to do that.

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I'm just a stranger with an opinion, but I would talk to her. Most of my best friends (as in lifelong, will-always-be-there-for-you friends) don't live near me, and we only see each other face-to-face every now and then. But they mean the world to me.

You wouldn't want something like this to jeopardize a decade-long friendship...

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

I mean my best friend knows. Last year when I had surgery it kind of made me rank friends. She isn't really your best friend if she can't know about this, think about it.

[SimiStar 37]

I'm having a hard time reconciling "I'm a super private person" and "I created a public account to show pictures of myself to the world ".

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

You're right it's a very strange reality. My goal was to have a safe place to share my wls story to people who have been there and done that. It wasn't intended to be open for the rest of the world. If fact a lot of people create account specific to wls only.

I was naive to think that I could keep that part of my life private.

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[Who'sThere 331]

I totally get being open with strangers and guarded with people close to you if it's something you want to talk about but also don't want public. Forums like this can be therapy.

I shared something very private on a pregnancy forum. A former friend (because she obviously never was a real friend) actually snooped and searched that forum to read my posts and was angry that I shared something with strangers that I didn't share with her. She didn't understand why I wouldn't talk to her about it then judged me very harshly for it with her limited knowledge of the situation. To make a very long story shorter, our friendship of over a decade was basically over. We are still friendly as we work together, but the friendship is gone. I'm not sad....anymore.

I'm not saying your friend was snooping. She totally could've stumbled upon it and is curious.

I'm just saying that I completely understand that sharing some things with strangers can be much easier than sharing with friends.

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[SimiStar 37]

I totally get being open with strangers and guarded with people close to you if it's something you want to talk about but also don't want public. Forums like this can be therapy.

I shared something very private on a pregnancy forum. A former friend (because she obviously never was a real friend) actually snooped and searched that forum to read my posts and was angry that I shared something with strangers that I didn't share with her. She didn't understand why I wouldn't talk to her about it then judged me very harshly for it with her limited knowledge of the situation. To make a very long story shorter, our friendship of over a decade was basically over. We are still friendly as we work together, but the friendship is gone. I'm not sad....anymore.

I'm not saying your friend was snooping. She totally could've stumbled upon it and is curious.

I'm just saying that I completely understand that sharing some things with strangers can be much easier than sharing with friends.

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Thank you for sharing your experience this was very helpful to know others have faced similar issues!

I hope to keep this friendship. But I don't know exactly how I'm going to do that yet.

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[Who'sThere 331]

I totally get being open with strangers and guarded with people close to you if it's something you want to talk about but also don't want public. Forums like this can be therapy.

I shared something very private on a pregnancy forum. A former friend (because she obviously never was a real friend) actually snooped and searched that forum to read my posts and was angry that I shared something with strangers that I didn't share with her. She didn't understand why I wouldn't talk to her about it then judged me very harshly for it with her limited knowledge of the situation. To make a very long story shorter, our friendship of over a decade was basically over. We are still friendly as we work together, but the friendship is gone. I'm not sad....anymore.

I'm not saying your friend was snooping. She totally could've stumbled upon it and is curious.

I'm just saying that I completely understand that sharing some things with strangers can be much easier than sharing with friends.

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Thank you for sharing your experience this was very helpful to know others have faced similar issues!

I hope to keep this friendship. But I don't know exactly how I'm going to do that yet.

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Be as honest as you can, even if that means saying sorry.

Tell her you are sorry that she found out that way but it's something you aren't ready to talk about yet aside from strangers. If she doesn't understand that, explain that it's like therapy.

Tell her you treasure the friendship and you will talk about it when you are ready.

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