Fall from grace :(

[nprcowboy 533]

Hi. Many of you followed my story as I went through hell with complications from surgery. 6 hospital stays, feeding tubes, ambulance etc..... I went through hell to finally be OK. I went from 308 to 171 as of this past March. I looked great and felt great. But.......

A heavy depression set in early this year. Work stress, marital issues, financial issues etc..... I got so depressed I tried to take my life twice!! I am blessed I survived twice I know this. After hospital stays to get better they put me on meds including abilify which is notorious for weight gain. I've gained 40lbs in 4 months and have been as high as 216 for a low a few months ago of 171. Depression is setting in as I went thru hell to get to that 171 now I'm obese again. Had to buy bigger clothes each month. I'm shocked with the sleeve how much I can eat now. The meds slow the metabolism and make it to where I'm not even aware how much I am eating.

Please help, how do I get the weight off now? 40lbs seems daunting when sleeve doesn't seem to be helping anymore.

I am sorry if this post disappoints many. I'm doing better mentally, no thoughts of hurting self and wasn't depressed until recently due to weight gain. I don't know how to get back what I went by thru hell to get.

From the poster boy of hell to success to falling from grace. Thank u all again for your support when I was so sick. Could use some more support now.

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[foevlo 21]

I am sorry to here that you have gained some weight back. I strongly believe that you can lose it again with a little focus. I also suffer with depression and among other things I take abilify. Slowly but surely I am losing weight 1-2 lbs per week. When it slows more than that I go back to basics. Lean Protein and lots of Water. This works for me. If your stomach is stretching Water will help fill it up. Good luck. And stay strong.

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[PJenkins 18]

I have been thinking about this and some of my thoughts may help you as they have helped me. I began to realize that I have punished myself for years with my weight. The message was that I didn't deserve to loose weight or have a flattering image. It takes some time to learn to love yourself. My daughter had the weight loss surgery done a year ago, and I watched her as she lost and began to get her old self back. I thought I could do it myself, so I started dieting with the help of a nutritionist. She suggested a small plate, sitting down and eating without other disturbances so I could concentrate on eating alone, and eating a plate with 1/4 Protein, 1/4 fruit, and 1/2 vegies. I lost 30 pounds, down from an all time high of 215. Time passed, and I concentrated less and less on loving myself enough to be healthy for me, and I began to gain the weight back. I went back up to 200. The depression was self hate and the message was one of failure. I wallowed in this for a bit, and then I decided that Portion Control was the important thing here. I had gastric sleeve done 8/15/16, and now am working through those first few weeks of new stomach syndrome.

The thing I am learning is that I can never again go back to the depression. Depression is like a light on your dash board that is bright red. It is a message that you are failing yourself. It is a call to action. My daughter says that she sees this as a reset. You have to reset your way of thinking about yourself. Concentrate on loving yourself. This does not mean to feed yourself with forbidden foods. Think about the way that you feed a child. If it would not be good for a baby, it certainly does not need to go into my mouth. See restricting as a form of self love. People gain weight on some antidepressants, but some like Welbutrin actually have the side effect of weight loss. See your doctor. The person that prescribed something that makes you gain weight is not your friend.

You can do it. Sit back and think about what you have already done. What an amazing thing you have done already. I think all you really need to do is to develop a plan to reset your weight loss. Go back to basics. See that Dr. that has done you wrong and straighten them out. You need people surrounding you with help and love. You might need a make-over. You do deserve to loose the weight. Remember that the depression is nothing more than a message. Get the message, and do something about changing your direction. Once you change the direction, you will move toward happiness and go back to your just after surgery diet. You know that works for you. Keep your eye on the prize!

[nprcowboy 533]

Thank you for kind words and advice

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[Christinamo7 4,042]

I am sorry to hear about all your troubles.

the only thing I can say is that my bariatric team suggested that I may consider Lexapro following my father's death if I need something because it is considered weight neutral. So perhaps you could talk to your doctor to see if that would be an appropriate change for you.

[KristenLe 5,980]

@@nprcowboy First of all - you should not worry about disappointing anyone! This is a difficult journey and no one is perfect! I'm sorry you've had such a rough time emotionally. Maybe a different medication would help your mental health while not causing weight gain. There's so many different meds and combinations. In the meantime, hopefully you are in therapy to deal with your depression and emotional state. In terms of weight loss and your sleeve - it's still there - and will be ready to help you. Try going back to basics - cut out Pasta, bread, rice, sweets, soda, etc. Once you detox from carbs - you'll feel much better all around. High Protein, low carbs - focusing on Protein first. Try adding a little exercise - release those endorphins. Stay strong - you can do this!!!

[nprcowboy 533]

Thank you

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[4MRB4PHOTO 3,900]

nprcowboy, you fell off your weight loss horse, now dust yourself off and get back on it. Don't beat yourself up over this.

You have done a great job losing your excess weight up to now and can do so again.

Get back to basics, follow your post op plan. Measure your portions, journal daily (liquids, Protein, exercise, etc.) and follow suggestions here.

We know you can do it!

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

Hi. Many of you followed my story as I went through hell with complications from surgery. 6 hospital stays, feeding tubes, ambulance etc..... I went through hell to finally be OK. I went from 308 to 171 as of this past March. I looked great and felt great. But.......

A heavy depression set in early this year. Work stress, marital issues, financial issues etc..... I got so depressed I tried to take my life twice!! I am blessed I survived twice I know this. After hospital stays to get better they put me on meds including abilify which is notorious for weight gain. I've gained 40lbs in 4 months and have been as high as 216 for a low a few months ago of 171. Depression is setting in as I went thru hell to get to that 171 now I'm obese again. Had to buy bigger clothes each month. I'm shocked with the sleeve how much I can eat now. The meds slow the metabolism and make it to where I'm not even aware how much I am eating.

Please help, how do I get the weight off now? 40lbs seems daunting when sleeve doesn't seem to be helping anymore.

I am sorry if this post disappoints many. I'm doing better mentally, no thoughts of hurting self and wasn't depressed until recently due to weight gain. I don't know how to get back what I went by thru hell to get.

From the poster boy of hell to success to falling from grace. Thank u all again for your support when I was so sick. Could use some more support now.

Sent from my SM-J700T1 using the BariatricPal App

I am so sorry that you are having a rough time, but thrilled that you are back! I was thinking about you not long ago.

I have struggled with depression for years so know it can do a number on us.

Have you talked to your doctor about your depression and struggles?

Are you seeing a therapist?

Are you attending support group meetings?

Have you talked to your NUT lately?

I highly recommend you start making some appointments today.

Are you tracking your food?

I also suggest you go back to basics.

Focus on getting in all of your Protein and fluids, take your Vitamins and supplements as directed, and exercise.

Exercise not only helps with general health and weight loss, it can be a tremendous help with depression.

Since many of us used food to cope with life pre-op, post-op it is even more important that we learn new, healthy coping skills. A good therapist, a bariatric support group, and even a 12-step recovery group like OA (OA.org), can help you gain tools for living without relying on food to deal with life's ups and downs.

BariatricPal is also a great source of support. I am so glad to see you back amongst us.

Welcome back!

[nprcowboy 533]

Yes I have been recg professional mental Healthcare.

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[nprcowboy 533]

I do need to go back to barbaric surgeon and nut though and check in. Maybe I just go back to pre op diet. But don't think I can do Protein shakes anymore after I was so sick post op they wrote a negative memory that the thought makes me nauseous

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[OzRoo 1,492]

@@nprcowboy

Sorry to hear about your struggles and challenges.

I know how awful depression can feel, as I had few in the past.

I too lately became severely depressed, about a month ago, due to still recovering from WLS, new job and my father becoming very ill and enormous stress with dealing with his ex wife, and legal matters.

In the end, it was like my body said "no more"! "Have a break and time out".

I am currently on Effexor 225mg, the highest dose, and am starting to feel better.

I know that some anti-depressants can stimulate the appetite, but Effexor doesn't.

There is another one, called Valdostan, that does not increase appetite either, and it helps to sleep, but I don't think it is available in the US.

Other people mentioned Wellbutrin, that it also doesn't increase the appetite.

As it was mentioned before, perhaps you can inquire re your current med, if it increases your appetite.

You can also google the info about other meds, and discuss it with your doctor.

Good luck, I hope you feel better soon!

As depression can be life threatening, I am glad you are getting treatment for it. All the best!

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

@@nprcowboy

I wish you the best in losing and I am sorry you had a rough year.

[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

Sorry if this comes across as ignorant or rude, but why do they have you on abilify in the first place?

Abilify is an anti-psychotic or used for bipolar... i do not understand why they would prescribe it for depression.... did you have episodes during that time? If not, you might want to speak to your psych about something less "harsh"

I know this is also off the topic.. but have you had thorough blood work done? Deficiency in some vitamins/minerals can also cause depression and mood disorders.

[KristenLe 5,980]

@ Ambilify is used in combination with other meds to treat major depression here in the States.

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