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Hi everyone.

Is been so long since I have been on here life has been crazy. I am 4months out since surgery and down 70lbs and I feel great. I also feel with the changes of my body that I as a person am starting to change and I don't know if I like that at all.

I am going to give you all a lil background about myself this may be long so I apologize ahead of time.

I have been over weight my whole life and at 19 I got married had my first at 20 and now 4kids and 11yrs later I am finally starting to lose weight other then putting it on. And if that wasn't keeping me busy enough for the first time I am not a stay at home mom Only I am starting my own business, and I feel like my life is no longer the same I thought I would be able to deal with all the changes a lot easier but it seems like I am not.

I see myself questions everything and everyone around me everyday I see myself forming and changing to a person I don't recognize and I don't feel good about that. Before the surgery I watched a YouTube video that said "you are not the same person as you are when you are fat and you will change", I knew it was coming but I don't like the person I am becoming. I am angry then I have ever been I don't want to be around my husband he shows me so much love and is there for me but I want him far away from me, and I can't tell you why I feel like that and it scares me to death.

I have so far to go until I reach my goal weight I hope only good feels come with that because I am afraid if I continue to feel the feels I have now my life is going to go upside down and I don't know now if that would be for good or bad. I don't know how I feel about myself so how am I supposed to know how I feel about the people around me? I don't know if this makes any sense to anyone, but this place has always given me good advice and I am hoping I can get some now.

Thank you for reading

All the best xoxoxo

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Losing large amounts of weight fast can cause hormonal chaos, especially for ladies. It may settle down as your body evens out. It sounds though that you would benefit with meeting with a therapist to go over all these feelings and develop coping strategies.

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Remember that you are going through some serious hormonal changes and that can skew your perspective. Ask yourself if your husband a good and loving man. If the answer is yes then give him a chance, maybe you just need to let him get to know the new you that you have created. Above all remember that this too shall pass, your feelings and emotions will level out, you just have to be patient with yourself and your husband.

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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