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Counting the cost.... no, not the $$$$



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<p>As a self-pay I'm well aware of the financial impact but I am still planning to get banded in Januaery (new tax year...). The poll on whether or not you are glad you got banded was great-- very informative. I'd like to come at it from a little different angle. Clearly, like most everything in life, there are pros and cons to the lap band. Many are the same for most/all and many are different. My question--</p> <p> </p> <p>What is the best thing about being banded (better health. appearance, conffidence, etc.)?</p> <p> </p> <p>What has been the most negative thing you have experienced?</p> <p> </p> <p>Bonus question-- have you ever dealt with depression and has your band affected that issue one way or another? If so, how?</p> <p> </p> <p>Thank you SO MUCH for talking the time to respond.</p> <p> </p> <p>Jim</p>

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:welcome: Jim!

I have only been banded for about 10 weeks so I am hardly the voice of experience (but always willing to throw in my two cents worth). So far I feel that the best thing about being banded is the confidence you feel that you have a back-up and therefore are not doomed to regain the weight

I don't even feel restriction yet but this confidence has given me the momentum to eat less purely on my own steam.

I have nearly a lifetime of experience with severe, recurrent depression. I'm actually bi-polar but cannot tolerate the usual medications usually used for this disorder. With the help of my psychologist I realized that I was likely to feel worse after banding because I would be prevented from comforting myself with food. I used to binge myself into a trance every single day to keep those painful thoughts and memories at bay (very common). And I mean huge binges....

My therapist of 14 years was concerned about the consequences of this "loss" and would not give her blessing to the counselor who did the psych eval. But so far all is well. Knowing in advance that I might have a temporary return to symptoms (and why) made it easier to accept and cope with when they came. One of the worse things about depression is that if you have an especially bad day you are totally convinced that it will be that bad for the remaining days of your wretched life. Expecting and planning ahead for a bit of a downward spiral made all the difference.

Good luck to you in your decision-making process. Take care.

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The best thing for me is apperance and self confidence. The worst is the slow weight loss. I know slow is healthier but I just wish it was faster.

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The best thing is that I am looking at this as a PERMANENT change, as opposed to a temporary change in weight, which is how my whole life has been....lose, gain, lose, gain, lose, gain....the thing that IRKS me is that I am (in my opinion) not LEARNING fast enough to get with the program. Don't get me wrong, I am doing GREAT, but I still FILL my plate....I still wonder if I will have enough to eat when I order in the restaurant...that's always been my mindset and it is a bitch to break! On the plus side...the weight loss has been couple by an unbridled optimism....even when I hit plateaus I am not discouraged (wow, there's a first!).

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This is the one thing keeping me from banding. I have depression, pretty much under control with meds. I feel I will grieve the loss of my overeating and I will either A) Eat bad stuff and sabotage myself or :) Become a severely depressed skinny person. I totally understand your worries.

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Call Me Jim---I am a self pay like you. My husband and I are retired and I feel like I am putting a burden on our finances. When I asked him what he thought, he was all for it. So, we will just tighten our belts(I hope I will be able to soon) and get this done.

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To everyone that suffers from depression: I too suffer from depression and like you I was worried about the absence of food in my life. My surgery is set for the 27th of August. I am on my 4th day of my liquid diet. So far so good. I have kept the depression at bay. If fact, I feel happy about making the decision.

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hello KACEE AND SERENA--I am glad I am not the only ones in their 50's getting the lap band. My dr. said he has never done anyone over the age of 55, so I was worried that he would not accept me. He said he considers "the mileage a person has left"!!!! Well, excuse me, I plan on having a lot of mileage left in me. Keep in touch.

P.S. I wish they were doing this when I was in my early 40's!!!!!

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I think of it this way, I wouldn't think twice about tossing out a couple of grand for a car, and they only last about 10 years! If you told me that the band is "self-expiring" and only works for 3 or 4 years, I might stop and think about it, but this is a permanent change for your health. Think about it this way. Would you like to have your husband have to be your caregiver if you were dibilitated with an obesity-induced disease down the road? I don't think so. This is totally the best thing you can do. I never once questioned anything about my age (soon to be 56 and proud of every white hair on my head!!!) (frankly the doctor sounding off about the "mileage" a person has left sounds like a complete asshole...pardon my French...that is an abhorrant thing to say. If you were 75 maybe....but in your 50's? Get outta here!). Matter of fact, Claramae, I sailed through my surgery and recovery with half to NONE of the complaints I heard from people less than half my age (maybe young folks just whine a lot...what do you think? *wink*), and I bounced back like a million dollars and I feel like I am 20 now.

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Also, claramae...I was a self-pay too. I didn't think twice about it and never looked back. As a matter of fact, in about two years when my loan is finished I am going to have some "work" done on me too....like my turkey neck and some Lipo to the thighs. YEEEHAAAAAA!!!! I'm gonna look like a million dollars by the time I retire!!!

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Hi Jim,

I too was self-pay. I went through Care Credit to finance the whole kabob. It was a tough decision due to finances, but thanks to my DH, he helped me make the best decision for me. I had mine done May 14th of this year and so far, I am happy I did. I dont recall ever losing this much in this amount of time. I am very happy with the results. I still have a ways to go, but in due time, it will happen. As long as I might be able to count on being at goal by my anniversary, and with God's help, anything is possible. Good luck with your journey and I hope all is well.

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The best thing:

Being ALIVE. I was gravely ill before banding as a direct result of being morbidly obese.

The worst thing:

Having to learn how to live my life without being on "Auto-Pilot". I have to THINK now and MAKE DECISIONS, whereas I didn't use to have to do that.

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"I feel I will grieve the loss of my overeating and I will either A) Eat bad stuff and sabotage myself or ;) Become a severely depressed skinny person."

Better to grieve the loss of food then have your loved one's grieve your loss! With the band, you know that your food habits are "terminally ill", so you can prepare for the grieving now. Accept the loss and open yourself to the new experience of living. The band is not a golden bullet. It doesn't do all the work. But it helps level the playing field of losing weight. You mind is the strongest weapon, and you have the capacity to contol it. Depression is much easier to manage with exercise, helaty living and meds if necesary. And if all that doesn't work, you will at least be a damn good looking severely depressed skinny person!

Food is a Siren: She will love us unconditionally, comfort us, make us feel better, never judges us, and is there 24/7. All she asks in return is our health, vitality, self-esteem, submissiveness, will, and money.

Sounds more like a Pimp to me! Don't be food's Ho!

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Pronetus,

I nominate you for BEST food METAPHOR EVER USED IN AN LBT POST. If such an award actually existed you would richly deserve to win. Awesome post!!

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I agree, Sereana! Pronetus certainly nailed that one!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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