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Does anyone else feel this way: What if it doesn't work for me?



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First time posting here, but I've been lurking for awhile.

I'm self-pay and scheduled with Dr. Illan in Mexico for May 12.

Feeling very calm and not nervous about the surgery itself...but I worry that I'll be the one this doesn't work for. Has anyone else felt that way??

About me 5'2", 47 years old, 295 pounds. I've been overweight since I was maybe 10 or so. Childhood pictures show a normal-sized child, but I don't remember not being fat. I was over 200 in high school, probably 250 or so before/after my two pregnancies, and been 275-295 for the last 15-20 years. That's were my weight seems to want to be; on the one hand, I can pretty much eat whatever, and I don't go up anymore; but on the other hand, it's pretty impossible to lose anything, and it always resettles in the 275-295 range.

I've been a vegan/vegetarian for over 10 years (first 5 vegan, now vegetarian). Before that I did Atkins and lost 80 pounds (but was also pretty much starving myself...it was Atkins in name only). Since then, I've done WW, superfood diets, blah blah blah. You know the drill.

I have Hashimoto's, which I'm sure plays a role in all this (I was diagnosed at hypothyroid about 16 years ago, and Hashi's about 5 years ago). I am treated properly for my thyroid and it is technically right where it should be.

I'm excited about having the sleeve because I feel like, from everything I've read, this will be the tool that gets me where I want to be. I love to eat healthy foods (though I eat bad ones, too, for sure), and wish I could be more active without the pain, so in theory this should all work for me.

But...I can't picture it. I don't know what it's like to be a healthy weight. What if my body can't do that, no matter how hard I try (so far it hasn't, afterall!). I feel like this is my last chance, so what if it doesn't work? These are my worries :/ I'll be the one it doesn't work for...

My goals are really just to be healthier, to avoid diabetes (I'm pre-diabetic now) and heart disease, to be able to go backpacking and walking and do all the things I want to do. I have a vague idea that I'll be able to fit into smaller clothes, and that would be fun (I've never in my life bought something that was actually cool or fun to wear or fashionable). I hope to lose a lot of weight, and I'm 100% willing to do the work. But....I've done the work before and been frustrated when nothing happens. So that is my worry and my fear.

Has anyone else ever felt that way? Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my rambles...

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YES. until I saw it start to work I thought I will probably be the ONLY PERSON that this doesn't work for. that is normal. :-) I still can't wrap my mind around being a normal size even as my belly is shrinking away each day a little bit.

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@@auroradawn ...Yes - I am just starting this journey but feel the same way! I am same age and just about same stats as you as well! What's making me feel better is reading all of the posts about successes but also stalls or perceived failures.

You are not alone!

Sent from my XT1254 using the BariatricPal App

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I have wondered the same thing. I have 3 people in my life that got the surgery but as soon as they could they started back with their old habits and gained it all back. I'm deciding to learn from their mistakes and be very vigilant with this tool cuz I have fought hard for it. Just got my approval today after 2 denials! So I'm gonna fight just as hard after the surgery

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using the BariatricPal App

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Add me to the list that thinks I'll fail. I've been overweight my entire life. I was 359 at highest and band got about 100 off but have 100+ to go. You are not alone but coming here for support is a good thing to do. Small steps add up!

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I think everyone has those feelings to some extent. You just have to make up your mind that you are going to do this and make it work. I was 286 and am down to 192 after 7 mos. The weight is much slower coming off now and I still want to lose another 50 pounds. It sounds like you have a good start on eating right, except you might be challenged on the Protein side. I have thyroid problems, PCOS, and did the whole anorexia thing when I was younger so my metabolism is pretty jacked up. I work out about 2 hours every day and probably in the best condition I have ever been in. I'm off all weight related prescriptions as well. The biggest thing is that you have to commit for life if you want this to work. I've lost and gained so many pounds over the years, and that is my biggest worry now. I still crave the sweets so I fight that battle as well. Like others say, this is not a battle, it is a journey. I think keeping the weight off will be the biggest challenge. You just have to be determined to do it, and stay committed.

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I think everyone has those feelings to some extent. You just have to make up your mind that you are going to do this and make it work. I was 286 and am down to 192 after 7 mos. The weight is much slower coming off now and I still want to lose another 50 pounds. It sounds like you have a good start on eating right, except you might be challenged on the Protein side. I have thyroid problems, PCOS, and did the whole anorexia thing when I was younger so my metabolism is pretty jacked up. I work out about 2 hours every day and probably in the best condition I have ever been in. I'm off all weight related prescriptions as well. The biggest thing is that you have to commit for life if you want this to work. I've lost and gained so many pounds over the years, and that is my biggest worry now. I still crave the sweets so I fight that battle as well. Like others say, this is not a battle, it is a journey. I think keeping the weight off will be the biggest challenge. You just have to be determined to do it, and stay committed.

Thank you! I'm not worried about the Protein. I get lots now from Beans and tofu, etc., and I'll supplement with Protein shakes as needed (once I reach the mushy, soft, regular food stages). During the liquid stage, I'll just have to rely on Protein Shakes rather than broth, etc.

I can already foresee that "head hunger" may be my biggest challenge down the road. I definitely want comfort foods when I've had a bad or stressful day. I need to find other ways to deal with that.

Thanks everyone. It's really comforting to hear I'm the not the only one that's wondered this!

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Yup! My mom had the band and regained most lbs, family friend had bypass and regained 90%. I'm freaked out I'll blow it after a year or two of getting comfortable -- if it even works. I know, logically, it will work (or else I wouldn't be killing myself to get the surgery,) but it's very hard to think in a year from now I could be 140 lbs lighter!

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Yep, I'm TOTALLY afraid I'll regain all/most/a sizeable amount of my weight. It's happened with every other diet, right? However, I know intellectually that it's much less likely, and that I'll have the support of a dietitian, support groups, this website, my surgeon, etc. All of which will help prevent regain.

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I think it is very common for W LS patients to be afraid that they are one of the few people that the surgery won't work for. I know I have personally struggled with that fear, not only before surgery, but since surgery.

Being a person who tends to pave her own way, within a month or so after surgery I realize that my surgeons advice was not making me feel healthy at all, so I started to experiment with what was right for my body. For a while I was really afraid that I was somehow ruining my chances for weight loss. As it turns out, adjusting my diet intuitively made me feel much better and the weight continued to fly off and still does.

This tool brings great success to almost everybody in the first year. It's just very hard not to lose weight with this tool. You can do this!

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Yes I felt that way. It makes sense because everything else we've tried didn't work. The sleeve WILL provide you the tool you need to lose weight. If you stick to the plan it will work. But you have to work too. It is not magic. If you view it as a lifestyle overhaul instead of another diet destined to fail you will be more successful in the long run

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Yes, you are not alone in feeling this way. I have a date for my sleeve for May 9th, and even though I am determined to follow every rule to a T I still have worries that I will be the one that it won't work for. I know it's irrational thinking, but that doesn't stop my worrying. I have one friend I was talking with today, and she was trying to tell me that my success with surgery is going to be the same as a person without, and that my odds of keeping it off aren't good. I can't help but to let her words hurt and discourage me on the day I was so excited to find out my surgery date.

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I'm 8 months out and 155 pounds down. Every time I get on the scale I expect it to read 400 pounds, not 250, 249, 248.

Every time I put on a piece of clothing that was too small, and is now too big, I expect it to be some sort of mistake.

Every time I sit in a chair with arms, I expect that I won't fit, but I do.

I was positive when I started this that I would be someone it wouldn't work for.

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First time posting here, but I've been lurking for awhile.

I'm self-pay and scheduled with Dr. Illan in Mexico for May 12.

Feeling very calm and not nervous about the surgery itself...but I worry that I'll be the one this doesn't work for. Has anyone else felt that way??

About me 5'2", 47 years old, 295 pounds. I've been overweight since I was maybe 10 or so. Childhood pictures show a normal-sized child, but I don't remember not being fat. I was over 200 in high school, probably 250 or so before/after my two pregnancies, and been 275-295 for the last 15-20 years. That's were my weight seems to want to be; on the one hand, I can pretty much eat whatever, and I don't go up anymore; but on the other hand, it's pretty impossible to lose anything, and it always resettles in the 275-295 range.

I've been a vegan/vegetarian for over 10 years (first 5 vegan, now vegetarian). Before that I did Atkins and lost 80 pounds (but was also pretty much starving myself...it was Atkins in name only). Since then, I've done WW, superfood diets, blah blah blah. You know the drill.

I have Hashimoto's, which I'm sure plays a role in all this (I was diagnosed at hypothyroid about 16 years ago, and Hashi's about 5 years ago). I am treated properly for my thyroid and it is technically right where it should be.

I'm excited about having the sleeve because I feel like, from everything I've read, this will be the tool that gets me where I want to be. I love to eat healthy foods (though I eat bad ones, too, for sure), and wish I could be more active without the pain, so in theory this should all work for me.

But...I can't picture it. I don't know what it's like to be a healthy weight. What if my body can't do that, no matter how hard I try (so far it hasn't, afterall!). I feel like this is my last chance, so what if it doesn't work? These are my worries :/ I'll be the one it doesn't work for...

My goals are really just to be healthier, to avoid diabetes (I'm pre-diabetic now) and heart disease, to be able to go backpacking and walking and do all the things I want to do. I have a vague idea that I'll be able to fit into smaller clothes, and that would be fun (I've never in my life bought something that was actually cool or fun to wear or fashionable). I hope to lose a lot of weight, and I'm 100% willing to do the work. But....I've done the work before and been frustrated when nothing happens. So that is my worry and my fear.

Has anyone else ever felt that way? Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my rambles...

Yes! I was mortified that the sleeve wouldn't or won't work because I had the lap band done and that was a nightmare!

I'm two weeks post-op and it's been a challenge, but I've seen a HUGE difference between the lap band and the sleeve! You will feel restriction in a way that you can't eat more food even if you wanted to, but you're not running to the ER every time (at least that was my experience with the lap band).

I'm not weighing myself either because that would drive me nuts! I'm only doing it once a month. It's forcing me to make better choices and be very aware what goes in my mouth

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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@@carolina07

I too have the band and I am revising to sleeve tomorrow. But I am so paranoid if this is the right thing for me. I had so many issues with the band that it scares me to get the sleeve its permanent. Can you please give me details as far as what you felt and comparison? Thank you

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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