Eating Disorder

[Sannah09 7]

Hello,

I am curious if anyone has been diagnosed with an Eating Disorder(ED) after surgery.

I am three years out and this Wednesday I am being evaluated for an ED. Would love to hear from anyone else who has been here.

Best,

Sannah

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[Cervidae 2,389]

I'd really like to follow this. Great topic of discussion.

Sorry about your possible ED troubles. I can relate. :/

[Sannah09 7]

Cervidae,

I hope someone has insight or words of wisdom to share.

Do you have an ED?

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[Cervidae 2,389]

@@Sannah09 I struggled with binge eating disorder for most of my teens and early twenties. Now, my doctor thinks I have "an unhealthy obsession" with tracking my food. She also thinks I starve myself on purpose, though honestly, it's a mixture of a lot of things. When I go over 700 calories, I stall. When I eat more than like... 30 grams of carbs, I stall. Some days I honestly cannot stomach food. I think I'm just adjusting to this new life, but my doctor and my therapist are both "keeping an eye on" my habits because they are both convinced I have anorexia. Neither of them understand what it's like after surgery and how hard it can be to eat, just for physical and practical reasons. Maybe they are right and I'm completely deluding myself because of my fear of stopping/gaining. Or maybe they just don't have a whole lot experiences with patients who have had the bypass.

I know, at the very least, I have serious body image issues. I'm working on it. :/

[Sannah09 7]

All the details and things we are asked to do lend so well to micromanagement of macronutrients. It's almost unreal; the rules. Then every doctor has a different set of guidelines.

My process has been plagued with complications. Leak, stricture/stenosis, ulcers, twisted sleeve, abscess and malnourishment. I was converted to bypass in October, because the stenosis wouldn't stay open.

I have developed a chewing and spitting habit. I do not like to eat. I have been told food can kill me (while i had leak and other issues) so i have a ton of anxiety about a feeding. I spent almost 3 years vomiting... Because of the stricture. food was very painful and started not being able to physically swallow food.

I do not enjoy food or the the idea of consuming. I have many other habits that i had beeb afraid to share, but have came up in therapy. Sounds like my "normal" is abnormal for most people.

Feeling so let down and regret of my sleeve. But here I am with a bypass and a mental mess.

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[Cervidae 2,389]

Man, I really can relate to so much of this. I do a "chew and spit" thing all the time, too. Not only do I not enjoy food but the process of planning what to eat or forcing myself to eat is extremely anxiety-inducing for me, too. I didn't have all of these complications you had to deal with, but from day 1 I've had a really (irrational) intense worry that my new stomach isn't strong or that if I get something stuck it will just tear or explode... things that don't even really make sense or have any chance of actually happening. I feel much, much better when I restrict my calories. Maybe not physically. But mentally, on the days I have some reason (whether real or invented) to greatly restrict my calories, I feel like I'm doing well. The days I actually eat 1000-1200 calories - I've only had two of these days - I feel absolutely horrible and the urge to drink nothing but a Protein shake or two the next day is almost unbearable.

The fact that I do lose more when I starve and stall or gain when I eat enough, coupled with how good my bloodwork still looks, just reaffirms my positive reaction to not eating enough and my anxiety and self-criticizing just pushes me further away from actual physical health.

I'm in therapy too. Let's hope we both kick these problems in the ass in the end.

[Sannah09 7]

Thank you for sharing your story with me. This is an intense and long process. I find it very comforting to know I am not in this alone. At the same time I am also sad to hear you are enduring this. No one should have to go through this.

This Wednesday I am having my ED evaluation. I feel like i am floating down the river, of denial.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD, from medical trauma. I greatly struggle with this concept.

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[SassyNanny 311]

Best wishes on getting a diagnosis and a treatment plan to beat this problem.

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[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

@@Sannah09 I struggled with binge eating disorder for most of my teens and early twenties. Now, my doctor thinks I have "an unhealthy obsession" with tracking my food. She also thinks I starve myself on purpose, though honestly, it's a mixture of a lot of things. When I go over 700 calories, I stall. When I eat more than like... 30 grams of carbs, I stall. Some days I honestly cannot stomach food. I think I'm just adjusting to this new life, but my doctor and my therapist are both "keeping an eye on" my habits because they are both convinced I have anorexia. Neither of them understand what it's like after surgery and how hard it can be to eat, just for physical and practical reasons. Maybe they are right and I'm completely deluding myself because of my fear of stopping/gaining. Or maybe they just don't have a whole lot experiences with patients who have had the bypass.

I know, at the very least, I have serious body image issues. I'm working on it. :/

I hope you get the help you need.

One thing I have learned in this process is that stalls are a normal, natural, and necessary part of the process; not something to be feared or avoided. They tell me that my body is doing the work of becoming smaller.

I hope your therapist can help you find peace.

Embrace the Stall!

http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

In addition to therapy, you might consider attending some OA meetings. You can find phone an in-person meetings as well as literature and podcasts online at OA.org.

[Sannah09 7]

Sassy Nanny,

Thank you kindly. This has been the worst 3 years of my life, plagued with illness and complication after complication.

I really thought this last operation would "fix" me. My physical issue would be cared for and so I would be okay. As it turns out, the clock has only been reset.

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[Sannah09 7]

Went to my assessment. It was incredibly tough. I still have not processed everything. Essentially I have an ED problem. They have worry about my heart, and I require more care. I have been told that I need to be inpatient or attend intensive outpatient ED treatment with medical supervision, until i am proven medically sound.

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[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

Went to my assessment. It was incredibly tough. I still have not processed everything. Essentially I have an ED problem. They have worry about my heart, and I require more care. I have been told that I need to be inpatient or attend intensive outpatient ED treatment with medical supervision, until i am proven medically sound.

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I know it must be tough for you but I am so glad you are seeking treatment. ED is no joke.

I wish you health and happiness. You deserve to be happy, joyous, and free.