Keeping your surgery a secret - is it possible?

[robynbyrd 5]

Only my husband and my boss at work know. I work in the hospital where I had it done so I'm sure others there know. But can't tell because it would be a HIPPA violation. It's hard but I feel it's no one's business.

[vsghealthymom 16]

Only my husband, best friend and mom know. Nobody else and I don't intend to tell anyone not even my kids know. Everyone sees I work out and do not eat carbs, I just tell them I work out and have a high Protein diet. So far so good!

[Dub 10,070]

There were a number of reasons why I was NOT going to try to hide the details of my surgery.

First.....the final straw for me in deciding to have the surgery was when I inured my back in April 2016. I missed 6 weeks of work....and was miserable when I returned. It was no fun at all.

Having the surgery was a countermeasure to help my back heal and hopefully avoid such pains in the future. I wanted my employer to understand the action I was taking. I had my sleeve + abdominal hernia repair and returned to work in 3 weeks.

I anticipated losing 200+ pounds and telling folks that I was simply watching what I ate and exercising seemed like a disingenuous way of handling it.

The questions and probing have all but ground to a halt. I simply hear, "Good job" and "Way to go, man" now. No real questions. I've been open and honest about my experiences with folks.......especially the ones who are considering the surgery themselves or have family members who are.

I suppose it all depends on your BMI and other details. I started at a BMI of almost 60 and plan to reside in the high 20's by year's end. Sorta hard to hide this. It may be very different for folks with a smaller gap to cover. YMMV.

Regardless.....I remain very grateful and pleased that I took the leap and hope you have the results you wish for, too.

[rnsamantha 352]

I've been very open about having mine, but after the fact. I told my immediate family and co-workers I was having it done beforehand and they were all supportive. When people ask how I've lost all the weight I tell them I had weight loss surgery (sleeve), but also make sure to mention I'm at the gym 5 days/week, plus a strict diet. I've had nothing but support in general, but can understand why others would want to keep it secret. I lost 100lbs in 6 months, and I think people would've had a hard time believing that I just did it with diet and exercise though.

[christinems4280 8]

*I want to preface this post with the following: I DO NOT judge anyone for the decisions they made about entering into this process. This is all my experience and my personal choices. What works for me and the reasons I made my choices clearly is different for everyone else. No offense is intended or implied.*

I'm a very open person by nature. It was never an option for me to keep the surgery a secret. I come from a belief that if you have to hide something or lie about something, it means you shouldn't be doing it. I didn't want to enter this process that way. I wanted to be proud of what I was doing for my health and well being. I wanted to be able to educate those who were misinformed (or uninformed) about the process.

My friends know. My entire family knows. My coworkers know. My bosses know. I've been met with overwhelming support and positivity. I have yet to encounter a negative response. I also feel by sharing my journey on social media, I'm forced to be held accountable.

Ultimately, you have to do what's right for you. Sharing my journey is what was right for me.

[fernandfj 469]

As many have stated, there is no right or wrong way here. It has to do with your personality and situation. I told my immediate family and coworkers and also have told people if they inquire what I'm doing. So far everyone has been very supportive. I am not an evangelist, but I don't hide it. This has worked for me, but I fully understand those who want to keep it to themselves.

[Densol 15]

In the UK - WLS is still rather rare. I've told lots of people and met with good luck and awe. People want to know what's involved and what I can eat etc I can easily loose weight ..... But I simply cannot maintain it. People are used to seeing me massive or slim lol

Edited February 9, 2016 by Densol

[llooft 7]

My plan was to only tell a few close friends. They were not supportive at all. One friend said I was going to die!

I felt the need to tell my boss.

A week post op - I put it out there on FB. I have also shared my struggles on FB. I'm amazed at the support and positive comments putting it out there has brought. I'm about 4 weeks out and have lost 28 lbs.

I'm excited for my future. It has been interesting to see who the support has come from.

Good luck all!!

[kickinit 13]

I got mine done and the only person that knows is my husband, makes it a little hard when I need advice but I have used this site a ton! People have tons of opinions... I just chose to not listen to any of them!

[karoberts17 33]

I only told my husband and a handful of people. I haven't told anyone in my family and probably won't. My mom and her battle with her weight were a huge determining factor on why I had the surgery. However, I won't be telling her anytime soon because I don't want to hurt her feelings. In the end the bariatric coordinator at the hospital said if you don't want to tell anyone just say "exercise and eating right" because really it's not a lie.

Edited February 21, 2016 by karoberts17

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Yes, it's possible.

I've told my husband and two close friends. The only other people who know are my doctors and their staffs.

My highest weight was 235 pounds. I slowly lost nearly 20 pounds before surgery. I had VSG surgery 18 months ago. Since then I've lost another 80 pounds.

My surgery day weight was 216 pounds. In the next 8.5 months I lost 66 pounds and reached my goal of 150 pounds. In the last 11.5 months I've very slowly lost another 15 pounds and am now maintaining at 135 pounds.

In all that time I've described for those who ask how differently I eat now (more Protein, more healthy veggies, fewer simple carbs -- and eat much more slowly) and how much more active I am, how much help my shrink has been -- all true. But I don't mention WLS.

No one else has ever brought up WLS either.

So, yes, it's possible.

[downsizingdiva 460]

it is completely possible! i'm well over a year out and noone knows!!! i highly suggest it

[NovaL 41]

I only told my mum, aunt and best friend - now 6 weeks post op people just comment on me looking slightly different although I am a slow loser, declining food was never my forte in the past so people have been speculative not about surgery but me making health changes and working out. Some choose honesty, some choose secrecy, whatever works for you, works.

Edited February 25, 2016 by NovaL