Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Scared to finish the process



Recommended Posts

I've struggled with my weight most of my life. I'm scheduled for surgery and did my pre-op testing today. I walked away completely overwhelmed from all of the information and wanted to run away screaming. I've never been in the hospital except to have my daughter which was scary as well. How do I ease the anxiety and go through with getting the sleeve? How long is it taking for you to feel ok again? Yes I know everyone is different and will have a different experience, I'm just looking for some feedback.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, it is scary. This was my first surgery, too.

What I have found is that what you are experiencing now, the pre-op fear and anxiety was the worst part of the process for me. I had a great recovery and am very happy with my results so far.

I know that stepping into the unknown is scary, but believe me, I would do it again in a heartbeat now that I have made it to the other side.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi. I'm a little under a week before my surgery and I am still scared to death. I know I am making the right decision and that for my health this is the best thing for me to do, but it's still scary as hell. It's all so overwhelming. My suggestion is to rely on your team. Rely on your supports and just know that you can do this. Little steps help. Taking it moment by mementos. Be gentle with yourself and give yourself the time to adjust. Ask as many questions as you can think of. If your program offers a support group GO TO IT! My support group is a mixture of pre and post ops and I know I can rely on them for any questions. They understand the fears. It is so very overwhelming and you will want to quit many times but keep plodding along and you will get there. It's a huge life change but a change that is worth it for YOU! You can do this just remember baby steps be kind and gentle with yourself. Believe me!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Will it help knowing what you are feeling is completely normal?

Surgery is always scary, even for people who have had surgeries before! You'll go in, get prepped, and they will put you under. The next thing you know, it's done and over with and you're waking up.

Not gonna lie, you're going to be a little sore, a little tired, and may struggle to drink your fluids and Protein. You may even regret it for a while. But as time goes on, you start to heal and feel better, and as a bonus you're losing weight! Although I had a fairly easy time of it, I didn't feel completely human for about 6 weeks. It takes time to recuperate from major surgery, so be kind to yourself.

Now at 15 months out, all of that is a distant memory. I feel great, and don't even feel like I've had 85% of my stomach removed except for the restriction. One of the best decisions I've ever made!

Just remember as you're going through the more challenging times that it WILL pass. Then you'll be on to the next phase of things. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok stupid auto correct I meant moment by moment not mementos! ????

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Although I was banded, ( not sleeved ) I think what you're feeling is completely normal. Change is scary !!! Everything is new, and overwhelming !! But if you look back at having your daughter, that was new and overwhelming too !!! And you did just fine, didnt you ?? Because you took it one day or one hour at a time. And then its not so scary , is it ? So there you go. You'll do just fine, and yes , if you can find a local support group, go !!! Lots of support and help. You will be soooo glad you had the WLS, my only regret is that I didnt do it sooner !! Good luck !!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This was my second surgery, but I had a small case of nerves on surgery day. Seriously though. One second you are talking to the anesthesiologist and the next second you wake up in your room all done. Lickety split. The pre op nerves are the hardest part. I told myself it was time for the big girl panties and get shit done.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It was my third surgery and it's human nature to be nervous and scared of the unknown. In Sept of this year I had foot surgery and it was such a difficult surgery. I was so nervous about my surgery because of it. My doctor told me that it is an easier surgery than foot.

I was questioning it.... but I was then reminded that it took a year to get everything together and ready. And wrote down a list of all of the reasons I wanted the surgery. And I kept adding to it. I mainly remember the week before I was nervous but I'm a month out and can barely remember those feelings. It is worth it. I do recommend getting a notebook and start writing down all of these thoughts, feelings, doubts and reasons. I'm not going to read my notebook until my one year mark. Those are my thoughts, just know you are not alone. It is normal. Plus everyone is different, I was in the hospital for 2 days. After a day or two I forgot I had just had surgery.

Being nervous is necessary for the process.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@cparni - I walked out of the office pre-op and stopped the process this time last year. I had already done a NUT class and had to complete three. They do one a month. I walked out because the office staff at my surgeons satellite office made me question the lap-band. I originally had planned on it for less recovery time.

The staff made me doubt my surgeon for not re-directing me to the band. The Psych and insurance lady had me REALLY wonder WTF was I doing the band because it has sooooo many issues. Needless to say after going home (eating like usual) thru the holidays and researching my original choice, the sleeve. I hit my HW(282) ever, at this time. I pulled up my "big girl panties" and got back into the game. That Staff was reprimanded for doing that to me. I wasnt the only one apparently.

I have never doubted my surgeon, or his skills, is my point.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It was my first surgery ever too. It was over before I even had a chance to process it. My recovery was so easy I sometimes wondered if I even had it done. Now at four months out I'd definitely do it all over again!

Edited by The Post Op

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My sleeve was my 12th surgery, and the easiest recovery of them all. Think of it as a nice nap, and when you wake up you will be on the way to a new you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can only repeat what most have said here. The feelings you have are normal and this is a decision that YOU have to make. A friend and I started the process about the same time. We are about the same height and weight. 2 weeks before his surgery he stopped and basically said, I can lose it without the surgery. Thats his decision. That was 7 months ago. He is heavier now than he was then and Ive lost 110 pounds. He told me the other day he wished he had followed through and has started the process once again. All I can say is I wish I had done this 10 years ago. Good luck

Edited by mark1733

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was a failed band patient (banded 2001) so doubly scared!

In late 2010 I was referred to the sleeve by my sleep apnea doctor. He told me i wouldn't be successful and poo-poo'd the sleeve and steered me to the bypass. I was on the verge... but just couldn't do it. I spent a year in emotional misery over it. I found a different surgeon; had the band removed in Sept 2011 and was sleeved Dec 2011.

4 years, down over 150# and not looking back.

I like to think that my year of suffering and anguish over it helped me to be successful. By the time I was sleeved I KNEW I needed the help of the tool and knew it was my "last chance". I was a no regrets, just gotta do this! sleever at that point!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

this year i have had 3 neccicary surgerys on my ears i have this weird conditon called a colestema that causes a pocket of infection to build up and eat away the bones in my ear and i was scared after i woke up i would be deaf from the surgery which is a real possibility. well my recovery for those were easy peasy and i know its gonna be the same for wls trust your team to get you through this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×