Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

The flipside of love



Recommended Posts

So..I'm happy with the boyfriend...very happy as a matter of fact. But...the flipside is that I have gained ten pounds since we've started seeing each other. No question as to why the gain. I'm eating out more...not being as mindful as I have been, slacked off on the exercise... Shall I go on? This really must stop. It's not his doing, it's mine. I know he's going to want Chinese food tomorrow night but either I'll have to get something steamed without sauce or better still, just tell him no, we need to go or bring in something better for me. I also have to slow down the drinking. I like a glass or two of wine with dinner but since I'm eating out more, I'm also drinking more. Have to reset and get myself back under control.

This is insidious..this creeping up of the weight. It's little by little, but it adds up. I just may have to speak with my surgeon about getting a small fill. Haven't needed one but maybe it's time.

Will keep you all posted. As you know, I post both the good and bad so no one has an unrealistic idea of surgery, weight loss/gain, and the tediousness of mindful eating during maintenance...which I expect will last the rest of my life. 'Always vigilant' will have to be my motto.

You folks keep me honest and this is part of that honesty.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm right there with you! I've been seeing small increases here and there and then I tighten my belt and get back to the basics those come off then I start relaxing again, not being so mindful and there they are again. I've been swaying 5-7lbs for about a year now. It's ok but I just want to get control over it so the 5-7 doesn't become 20. In my opinion maintenance is a lot more trying then the weight loss. I think it's because we've hit where we want to be but we're no longer fitting into different sizes, our new us is now just us. The comments have stopped and everyone now just sees us as us, they don't remember the "old" so in a way we forget too?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How about cooking healthy at home, together ? Saves money and calories, and you still get to spend time together. Also, with your lovely New York winter coming your way, you'll be spending less time outdoors, etc and more time indoors , close to all that comfort food. Soooooo, where do you want to be at the holidays ? Ten pounds less or another 10 pounds heavier ???? Your call.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, love's bliss has got your mind elsewhere!!! I have full confidence you'll reign in the eating/drinking because you know how important this is. Constant, consistant vigilance indeed.

I think this is where the band is a tougher tool than, say, the sleeve or bypass. Because it does allow us so much more leeway, whereas the other tools have much more dramatic consequences to not remaining compliant.

Sending you renewed committment, and total confidence that you will take off the 10 lbs and get back to your new normal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OK...so took a step in the right direction. As you may or may not know, NYC apartment kitchens are not like on TV or in the movies. They are tiny tiny rooms with minimal storage. I ordered a blender so I could use it for smoothies. I know that these drinks can also be calorie laden but I will make sure they are healthy and not full of empty calories.

In order to have room for the blender, I had to go through my one storage cabinet and start to get rid of things. Tossed some of the pots I know I don't need...and got rid of a large colander as well. These items were used by me for mostly Pasta related cooking. These days, a small strainer and small saucepan is enough as I never cook more than a cup of Pasta at one time. Then that cup is portioned out and frozen into 1/4 cup amounts.

So, as I started to rid myself of some of these items, I took stock of what has changed in the nearly three years since I've used the big pot and colander. I haven't binged on pasta in all that time. Didn't eat till I was stupified as I had done. I recalled how I'd limp home..in terrible pain, just to eat to excess knowing that I was only making my condition worse.

So the pots are now gone, and so is the joint pain. So is 145 lbs. So is all my fat clothes. What has changed? I move normally. I fit everywhere. I'm not ashamed of my size. I can sit on the floor with my grandson and play with him. I'll be able to climb the monkey bars with him as well when he's old enough to go to the playground. I can put him on my lap as I now have one. I wear pretty clothes. I wear makeup, do my nails, hair, etc. Men notice me. One man in particular notices me and I'm very happy with him so far. I sleep in someone's arms again. Oh how I missed that.

Basically, when you add up the pluses and minuses, life without eating to excess is certainly a better thing than a big bowl of spaghetti and sauce.

I'll get this thing under control...I know I will. I can't ever let myself get the way I was. And with folks like me, ten pounds might as well be 110 pounds.

Thank you friends for your comments. I appreciate your support..I need your support.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I hope we are all here for the long run ... Good and bad... Highs and lows. Literally.

Thanks for the insight Liz .

3 weeks til my fill and I'm beginning to struggle. Yikes. Just when I got complacent after 8 years and thought I had it covered! Not so true.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×