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I am still having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea of 1/2 cup of food. How is this manageable? I am thinking of holidays, celebrations, other social gatherings. How do you share a meal with anyone when you eat hardly anything? I eat lunch at work with several of my colleagues. Even though I always have a salad I feel like I will need to eat alone because it would be too socially awkward. This is a big hurdle that I need to overcome before I move forward with the surgery. How do you handle this? Is this something others struggle with, too?

Edited by LaurelB

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I have an hour long lunch break at work and typically take my lunch. I eat slowly and when I am done just continue to enjoy the company of the others I'm having lunch with. As for dining out, you will always have leftovers ???? but it's only as awkward as you let it be. Once your family and friends get used to your new eating habits it's really no big deal. Good luck!

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Those celebrations have become about the people and the conversations, not what or what amounts of food I can eat... that is actually liberating in a way. I haven't felt awkward during work lunches at all. Everyone knows I had the surgery, but even if they didn't it really isn't that odd for a person to just have some yogurt or something small for lunch. I really don't pay that much attention to what others bring for lunch, or how much of it they eat... so I assume they don't really care much about what I am eating! If you are with people that don't know you had WLS you can always just say "I'm not very hungry, I had a late lunch".

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Thanks for sharing. My lunch group is pretty healthy and already aware of my eating changes however they don't know about my possible WLS. I just think 1/2 cup...that's like an apple or half a yogurt. I know they will get on me about not eating enough food. I don't want to share my decision with them and maybe I am naive to think I can just go unnoticed. I thought since they have seen me the last few months radically change my diet and exercise (usually go for walk with a few during lunch and started jogging) my weight loss wouldn't be that viewed as extreme. They are super supportive so I know they will get on me about "not eating" fearing it was an eating disorder.

Going out to a restaurant is not an issue, I've managed to figure out what to order. I feel that even if I get a side salad I wouldn't even be able to eat half of that and how will that make the person sitting with me feel about eating their "normal" side entree. I worry about their feelings especially if they struggle with their weight. I know I should focus only on me at this time in my life but I can't help but think of making others feel awkward which in turn makes me feel awkward (still about me...lol) . Like eating steak in front of vegetarian. Will I be giving up having meals with friends? I know you can't have it both ways...eat "normally" like others once every 2 months (this how often I go to a social event/gathering like birthday, etc)

Edited by LaurelB

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At 16 months out, I can top out at around a cup of food. There is no way that my body needed all that food I was shoving in before my sleeve. How in the world did I eat a full plate at the buffet, go back for seconds, then eat a desset, maybe two, and wash it down with a quart of soda pop?

No wonder I was fat! How could I eat a loaded omelet with cheese for Breakfast, with four pieces of toast, three cups of tea, and an orange. On a day off from work, lunch was an all-day graze out of the fridge every half-hour or so. At dinner, I could eat a big salad with 1/4 cup of ranch dressing, a seven ounce steak, a big loaded baked potato, corn on the cob, green Beans, and apple pie with two scoops of ice cream.

Why could I eat oatmeal at home, stop by McDonalds on the way to work at get a sausage egg cheese muffin, with hashbrows, a cinnabun, and large orange juice, the eggs, biscuits and gravy, and bacon plus more orange juice from the cafeteria at work, the several Cookies for a mid-morning snack, a full lunch from the cafeteria, two candy bars in the afternoon, stop by Burger King next to work on the way home to ge a whopper, big fries and large soda pop, a few mile down the road stop at McDonalds at get a fish sandwich, more fries, and another large soda pop.....the closer to home get an ice cream cone, and a mile from the house Stop at another McDonalds and get a Southwestern salad with chicken and four packets of dressing, eat it in the parking lot, then go n the house, take a shower and get comfy and then eat a full dinner?

Not to be outdone, at bedtime I would have a microwave bag of popcorn all to myself, plus a 2 litre of soda pop. Most nights I would wake up hungry enough to eat my thumbs and have a large serving of whatever leftovers were in the fridge or a Jethro-sized bowl of Cereal with 1/4 cup of sugar. This was every day, and no different in front of company plus birthday cake and more ice cream for the celebration of it.

And Thanksgiving or The Olive Garden?....let's not go there If I went bowling with friends, I could easily eat 1/2 the pizza by myself, plus another two-liter of soda pop. What I am saying is that with my little bit of food I am eating, I am thriving just fine, thank you, and am so much healthier for it. Just tell anyone that speaks out on it that you are eating in a nutritionally excellent manor and healthy and thriving for it. Become an evangelist about it, not an apologetic shrinking violet. Go enjoy your social situations and become a great conversationalist. People are not like to hold you down and force feed you because you are eating lightly. Good luck and speak up for yourself.

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While 1/2 c is typical in the beginning, you will be able to eat more as time passes. At 5 months out and 70+ lbs down, my work lunch is often something like a few slices of deli meat and a low fat Greek yogurt.

I eat with the same folks everyday at work and they know about my surgery. I simply said "this is what I'm doing, so this is what you'll notice". No biggie. They were more curious than anything else and had questions which I was happy to answer.

Now people who know me realize I don't give a rats *ss what they say so I have had no negative feedback. That may be a factor LOL Seriously, if I want medical advice I ask my surgeon and nutritionist.

No one pays any attention to my food at lunch. Much too busy enjoying each other's company ????

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It's been no big deal for me, either. I rarely get a lunch break, so my normal work day consists of constant grazing.....mixed nuts, Quest bar, Protein smoothie, Jerky, string cheese, whatever I can eat in between appointments. My partner actually comments about how I'm always eating.

As for going out and buffets, etc. I just eat what I can eat, no biggie. I often split an entree with someone who's also "watching their weight". Or I get whatever I want and end up with a lot of leftovers. Everyone knows I've had surgery so they are used to what I eat and no one really cares.

I was at a memorial service yesterday where the served spaghetti and meatballs, vegetarian lasagna, bread, salad and various Desserts. I had 1 meatball (no pasta), some salad, and dissected the layers of 1/2 piece of lasagna to get mostly the veggies and cheese. A little later I split a cookie with someone and took a couple bites of someone else's cinnamon roll. Oh yeah, and drank 2 16 oz bottles of Water but passed on the beer and wine.

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As the anorexics do, spread your food around so it looks like you've eaten more, and pull disgusted looks both at your plate and people fatter than you at the table. Source: my sister was an anorexic.

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It hasn't been bad for me either. Many people know I had the surgery but even for the ones who don't, they never commented on the little amount I eat. Plus on my 40 minute lunch break I would take 30 minutes to eat my lunch so it's not like I'm done in 5 minutes. People are too busy with conversations to worry about what I consumed. :)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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