why oh why oh why?????

[areellady 1]

For the life of me I can't understand WHY my MIL asks me ALL THE TIME how much weight I have lost...and then proceeds to tell me how much she has lost.....Here's the conversation.

MIL: "Now how much weight have you lost?"

ME: "49.5 pounds"

MIL:"Oh, well guess how MUCH I have lost?????"

ME: "How much?"

MIL: "FOUR POUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

as there is a LONG pause wanting some kind of reward ........

ME: "That's GREAT!! I bet that makes you feel good, huh?"

Then there comes FIL....

FIL: said to me..."You need to come get MIL and take her for walks and bike riding with you. She needs to do that, you know."

ME: In my dreams I say this...."Yeah, well get off your ass and take her then cuz I don't have the time or motivation to be someone else's exercise support groupie right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" In reality, I say...." Yeah, I will."

GOD!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WISH I would of never told them.

Last time we went out to eat with them I ordered and then FIL says, what do you want to drink? I told him nothing. He said, "well, you don't have to get pop, you could have Water." This is all taking place in front of the order taker. I say, "no, I don't want anything." He insists that they bring me Water. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO water!!!"

This is just annoying to me. Let me make my decisions and you make yours.

[edieparks 2]

My In-laws drive me crazy too. Don't get me started.

I wish I had some solutions and cute come backs.

I feel ya.

edie

[areellady 1]

Well, Edie, I am glad that I am not the only one who would love to shove a big sock in someone's mouth!!!

[faithmd 14]

You have just confirmed my decision NOT to tell my in-laws (or anyone else, for that matter).

My MIL needs about four pairs of dirty, smelly socks stuffed in her mouth, and duct tape applied. Everything you have happen to you, she's had happen and it was sooooo much worse. Example: My husband has some significant back issues and has had injections and is seeing specialists. We mention to her that he had another injection and her back is KILLING her, it comes from an accident she had when she was 15, you know. (Yes, EVERYONE knows, we've all heard it 5,000 times.) She borke her pelvis and oooooo, the sciatica. It runs down her legs and wraps around her knees. And the back, well, you know her borther and her mother and four of the kids have back problems, it runs in the family, Amy had surgery for it, maybe you should....

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

[areellady 1]

LOL...sorry, I had to laugh!!! Why can't people just keep their mouths SHUT?? Guess it is what they do best!! Deanna

[travelgirl 3]

<p>

You have just confirmed my decision NOT to tell my in-laws (or anyone else, for that matter). </p> <p> </p> <p>My MIL needs about four pairs of dirty, smelly socks stuffed in her mouth, and duct tape applied. Everything you have happen to you, she's had happen and it was sooooo much worse. Example: My husband has some significant back issues and has had injections and is seeing specialists. We mention to her that he had another injection and her back is KILLING her, it comes from an accident she had when she was 15, you know. (Yes, EVERYONE knows, we've all heard it 5,000 times.) She borke her pelvis and oooooo, the sciatica. It runs down her legs and wraps around her knees. And the back, well, you know her borther and her mother and four of the kids have back problems, it runs in the family, Amy had surgery for it, maybe you should....</p> <p> </p> <p>AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG! I think your MIL is my Step-Mother. And since she's not related to me by blood you'd think she'd be smart enough to realize that problems the run in HER family cannot be transferred to ME....but no. Every time family history health probs come up, she feels the need to tell me all the problems in HER family, and that I should be checked for this or that because it's inherited. WTF?:tired

[Marimaru 7]

Maybe tell your FIL next time he says something "If she wants to go with me, tell her to give me a call". That way it's not on you, and she'll probably never call you (unless you think she will, in which case it turns out not to be a good idea).

You could quit answering when she asks how much you've lost. Just say something like "I'm not paying that close of attention, but my jeans fit great". It would be a lie, since we all watch the scales like crazy, but still.

[areellady 1]

Trvlgrl,

THAT is even funnier...maybe when you marry into a family the rest of the family get inherited diseases and such...LMAO!!!

Marimaru,

the thing of it is, she HAS NO DESIRE TO EXERCISE and she knows this and I know this. Many, many, many times I have tried this with her and she always ends up bugging out on me at the last minute. It gets tiring thinking that you are going to have someone to walk with and then at the last minute they call and say, "oh, I have to go here and here, so I can't make it today." It is SOOOOO much work trying to get her to go. I get in my car, drive over there, go in the house, she is sitting in her pjs, "oh I guess I will go get dressed now." WTF? Get dressed BEFORE I come over!!! God, it pisses me off. I have just started not answering him. OMG, when we first got our bikes we rode them to her house and took her with us. She couldnt even make it a mile before we had to stop. I told hubby, I know she is your mom, but honey, I can not exercise with someone who is going to slow down MY progress. He agrees!! If she gave it some effort and rode a bit every night to get into shape then it would be one thing, but she just wants to go once in awhile whenever FIL gets after her for not exercising and that is doing NO GOOD!!! Oh, if only we could change the in laws!!!! LOL...I am going to have a DIL pretty soon and she will probably think the same thing about me!!! LOL...I don't know...guess its just life...Deanna

[Marimaru 7]

Deanna,

Not all in laws are awful. I'm sure you'll be a great in law :scalesno:.

You just can't change people like that though, and I imagine it's incredibly frustrating that your FIL seems to want to make you responsible for making her workout. At least your hubby agrees with you. I read things like this where the actual child of the in laws argues for the in laws when they are treating the spouse badly and it just makes me insane!

[areellady 1]

Sarah, You are right about that. At least my hubby supports ME...and not the parents on this one. They are really nice people who just say stupid things...LOL...Deanna

[green 6]

When I was younger I had this fantasy of finding an orphen to settle down with. I do have problems with my in-laws and it has taken me many years to educate my husband that we have to come first as a unit.

His family was used to him being single and to, well, owning his free time. He now recognises this but his sister sure can't deal with it and blames all his tensions with his family on me. In fact she recently ripped me a new one and then hung up before I could rip her a new one. The touching thing is that my husband was horrified by the way she treated me and wants nothing more to do with her, ever. His parents, oddly enough, are the only people who do now kinda get our relationship.

I sometimes suspect that this family has problems because we have never married even though we have been together for over 22 years. This does strike me as strange. We are so happy together and have been together for so long and his sister is married but has been in the middle of an ugly divorce for the past 5 years.

[areellady 1]

Green, yes, why is it that the in laws find it hard to except that you and hubby and YOUR kids are a unit and that does NOT have to include any of them!! I don't know, my son moved out and I let him call me, or come see me. I don't show up unanounced and expect to sit with him or expect him to come to my house and be with me all the time. This is what I have waited for...him to grow up and be a man. I actually have an update...I took MIL to the bank this afternoon and she said NOT ONE WORD TO ME about the weight. I was so happy, I wanted to hug her!!! Deanna

[EVA 0]

Thats so funny... No seriously I feel your pain. My MIL wants to feed people like all the time. When we come over she insists you eat and when she serves you her portions are for athletes. When I dont finish my plate she looks at DH with look of disgust he just smiles at me and I want to laugh. He knows how much I can and can't eat. The one thing that really gets to me with her is birthdays. She cuts cake into these giant slices so a cake that should serve 10 serves 5.....I know I know not a big deal but it just bugs me couse when she serves food all this food is left on peoples plates and its just wastefull like. I mean Ive never gone hungry and Im not counting other peoples food but I grew up in a house were you served what you wanted and if you finished you could have seconds but you didnt just pile your plate to the sky to look at it. Hrm I really needed to let that out lol thanks guys

Eva

[areellady 1]

OMG!!!!! Once again, last night, hubby and I invited in laws to the Greek Festival in town to eat, and by end of night riding our bikes came up and ONCE AGAIN FIL says, "You need to not go 10 miles and just go 2 miles so you can come get MIL and take her with you." OH MY GOD!!!!

SHUT THE F>>>CK UP!!! If and that is a BIG IF..she wants to ride her bike...SHE IS A BIG GIRL AND CAN RIDE IT WITHOUT ME!!!!!! My DD bless her heart...is 12 and says to her grampa..."you need to get a bike and ride with gramma..." he then tells her,

"in the summer time that is hard for grampa to find the time to do that"...oh my hell...BUT I AM SUPPOSE TO FIND THE TIME TO MAKE HIS WIFE RIDE HER BIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to freaking scream!!!

It is too the point where I really don't even want to be around them...AT ALL!!! Deanna

[green 6]

I don't see that it is any of your FIL's business what you do with your time and how you choose to spend it. If he is worried about his wife then he should be making the time to go bicycling with her and not shovelling this chore off on to your shoulders.

Perhaps you might point out to him that you, too, work hard and this time which you have to go on outings on your bike are special to you since they combine exercise and a break from the family chores and cares. You might explain that you look upon these times as your physical and emotional renewal periods and that you are not prepared to share them at this time. You might also indicate to him that if he were to go bicycling with his wife these trips would be healthy for them physically and good for their relationship. Certainly what he is asking of you is not fair given that it is a fight to get the old girl off her couch and up and on her wheels.