Discouraged/Sad

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

My mom had the lap band and me my brothers sisters and dad changed our diets got junk out of the house and most certainly would never eat pizza or fast food around her. We ate more healthy and we ate what she could eat. We'd even eat all different types of Soup with her the first few weeks at dinner. Anything to make it easier on her. So there is a such thing as a supportive family. It's a shame everyone doesn't have one, it's a shame its such a strange thing to some people but it exists!

that's all very nice if you but not every family is going to do that. It certainly doesn't warrant calling people you don't know A -holes. There are other ways to lend support.

[kyrickchick64 468]

People are going to eat in front of you. This was your decision not theirs. If you can't handle it you should leave the room.

[4MRB4PHOTO 3,900]

If the temptation is too much, then eat in another room or before or after them. Ask them not to offer you any of it.

You will be able to enjoy fast food on occasion and in moderation later. Once you start enjoying your life after you lose your excess weight, you will realize it is only food and is it really worth going back to your pre-surgery self by over indulging on it.

You can also make less fattening, healthier and cheaper versions of it at home later.

Remember, it was our choice to be sleeved, the did not. They should be supportive of you if you explain how you feel.

[alindsey 230]

Just call it kind I see it Family should be supportive and bend over backwards for their moms, granted it wasn't their choice to be sleeved they should be supportive, period. Anyone who isn't supportive of their own mother is a a-hole lol I don't care who doesn't like it I just call a spade a spade. I bet as a mother she would bend over backwards to support them to reach their goals. Just saying!

[coleenrenee 66]

Oh my goodness this thread is way out of hand ... They were assholes Lmbo... In a moment of weakness I lashed out. Yes it was my decision and no my family does not have to eat what I'm eating either .. But before I decided to have wls we as a family discussed the types of meals that we ALL would be having. We were doing fine pre op they waited until the time that I really needed the support post op to have a fast food bonanza .. I know it sounds crazy but they backed out of the deal and I was pissed. I've eaten alone the last two days and it sucked but I'm over it.

[alindsey 230]

Lol Coleen you got this! Good luck girl stay strong!

[LBS15 18]

My husband and son had pizza the other night for dinner and I wasn't hungry so I did a workout video while they ate. Most nights we eat together but I did mine own thing sometimes too. Just part of the new life, I guess.

[Nikkidoodlebug 120]

I had my surgery march 11th. I went thru the same feelings you are, I'm sorry that they are not being discreet about there "habits" my honey was great and kept it all under wraps but the kids, not so much! Kids are kids they don't understand. Well I promise all of the bad feelings will soon pass, I still do get upset when I see someone eating a big juicy burger, because I can't even take one bite, but then I look at myself in the mirror and not having the burger is worth it! Well good luck and it will get better

[Alex Brecher 10,516]

Coleenrenee,

First, congratulations on your huge amount of weight loss so far! You must be working super hard to be down so much in such a short amount of time. Well done!

I’m sorry about your situation. It really is tough to adapt to your new lifestyle when the people around you are eating fast food in front of you. Talking to them is always the right first step, but sometimes it doesn’t help. Sometimes, they can’t change, just like you couldn’t before WLS.

Another strategy you can use is to take it just one day at a time, like you’ve been doing. For example, obviously you haven’t been eating fast food while you’ve been on the broth and purees. How did you get through the broth stage? By saying it would end soon, not by looking at the rest of your life and feeling like you would be deprived for the rest of your life. So instead of looking at fast food as something you’ll never have again, just look at the next little bit. Focus on what you can eat – purees, now. Don’t think about the rest.

If you eat with your family, try to think about the other things you like about eating with your family. Yes, eating pizza might be fun. But what else do you like about eating with them? Talking at the table? Focus on that.

Know that deep down, they’re probably feeling guilty about not supporting you and/or jealous at the enormous amount of control and strength you are showing by sticking to your plan. Just wait until your weight loss is visible – which will be super soon if you keep going at this rate! You’ll feel much better, and it will be so worth it. So rather than feeling sorry for yourself that you have to follow this diet (and I’m not saying you’re feeling sorry for yourself), feel sorry for them that they’re still eating junk food while you’re getting healthier.

We all know it’s tough. Hang in there. It will be worth it, and you know it will because you already see it on the scale.

[I Can and I Will 29]

Watch your own head games... You are first and make a great decision that will be so worth it...you are building strength with each little test. The one thing I wish I knew when I first got my surgery was the importance of BREATHING!!!! When you feel discouraged, anxious, angry...what ever...take three deep breaths and just breath...it negative energy will go????????????????????????. Healthy weight feels so much better and longer than a fast food meal????????????

[LadyK44 263]

Sometimes we just have to remember that being fat did not happen overnight. I am nine months out and working towards goal. This is not a miracle cure it is lifestyle change. Keep trying and keep moving and you'll make your goal don't give up on you! I am officially 184 pounds and my goal is around 145 and I started at 269. Keep it moving and best of luck.

[Pepper123 320]

Regrets ?...hell nooooo!..There"s a core group of people that i told, if anyone does not support me TRUST i have big support for my self...I only have to look at my size and thats support and motivation i need. It is also normal to feel this way food is every where...Maybe a talk with a therapist ?...Best of luck!

[Graciesmom04 184]

I was sleeved on April 23rd down 20 lbs pre op and 14 lbs so far post op. I know it's not going to be over night but it's getting really depressing my family isn't being as supportive as I thought they would be. My family eats fast food almost every night while I enjoy broth (hooray for purée, started today) it's really getting on my nerves. I think I'm more on edge than ever ... Please tell me I'm not the only one has had a down moment through this process... I'm feeling like I shouldn't have done this having a lot of regrets.

I found for the first couple months after surgery, eating alone worked much better for me. While my hubby and kids would eat in dining room, I would fix whatever I was having and take it to the living room. I wasn't tempted by what they had, wasn't jealous of what they had....and it made me a much happier person. As far as being on edge, that's normal after surgery. I think we all went through that. Hang in there...it does get better.

[BeagleLover 1,020]

@@alipollard, I suggest looking for a local support group. It has made a big difference for me!