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Sometimes you just get tired of being strong.

Exactly!

Thank you everyone. It's going to be a long road of sadness, guilt and anger. a hard lesson learned about what depression can do to an otherwise generous, loving man.

@@kimpossible67 Sorry to hijack the thread, but just wanted to let you know it's OK to let your guard down sometimes and don't let it bother you. MHow is your mom doing?

You didn't do anything wrong! I can't imagine how much pain he must have been in to take his life. Depression is horrible and not dealt with properly.

Mom is doing as well as expected.

I'm still in shock of how she looked in ICU hooked up to everything. The vent broke her lip. Open and it was swollen and bloody. She looked like she'd been socked in the eyes, the were purple. I'm having a hard time dealing with it all. She's had countless surgeries but nothing like this. Thank you all for asking. I haven't talked to her in 3 days and that's not normal. I just feel like sleeping.

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@@Kindle I am so sorry to hear about your best friend. It breaks my heart that you have to deal with their passing in such a horrific manner.

I'll say a very special prayer for you tonight, and I sincerely hope that you will find some inner peace very soon! BIG HUGS!!!

My best friend committed suicide on Sunday. I couldn't begin to tell you what I've eaten in the last 3 days but pretty sure it didn't involve much Protein. Tons of food being dropped off and it's all about carbs. Just try and stay hydrated and don't worry about the rest right now.

Hoping your mom recovers soon....

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@@kimpossible67

Hope your mama is on the mend! Take care of yourself, too!

@@Kindle

I'm so sorry to hear that. Hang in there and know we all are thinking about you during this difficult time.

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My prayers to all of you going through these rough times. No butt kicking here, just love & support. You do what you need to do to get through these times. We'll be strong for you while you get through this. Please keep us posted.

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I know the stress you are dealing with. You are fine. Just try to stay calm and dont borrow trouble. Right now you need to focus on family more than your food. Stay strong. You are in my prayers.

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@@Kindle

Im so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers. If you ever need an ear to listen and a heart to love you i am here.

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No one can be perfect all the time. All you can do is your best for THAT day. One day your best might not be so great, because of all the other factors involved. Just do the best you can and move onto the next day. Yesterday I was feeling sorry for myself because my ears are infected and hurt a lot and I wasn't able to exercise and so I had some ice cream. Oh well. One bowl of ice cream in the grand scheme of things isn't going to make much difference. All I can do is move on and do my best today.... whatever my best is considering my ears still hurt like hell.

The point is, as someone else said, sometimes you just get tired of being strong and that's okay. The important thing is to not spiral downwards and let your "failure" serve as an excuse to "fail" some more!

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Oh my god, Kim, I'm SO sorry. There are no words. You just do whatever it takes to make it through this. Be kind to yourself. I'm so sorry.

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My mom passed away at 3:30 this morning. I can't eat. All I want is coffee.

I am so sorry. There are no words I can say that can take away the heart ache that you must be experiencing, but please know that you are in my thoughts.

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

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      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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