Family Support

[tryingthis 1]

I've been stalking this forum for over a year now, and appreciate all the advice and support you've provided on here.

I've recently made the decision to go forward with the Lap Band and could not be more pleased and confident in my decision. The only thing holding me back at this point is support (financial and emotional) from my family. I will be a self-pay, and I'm 95% certain I want to go with Dr. John Weaver in CO. Unfortunately, I was not able to qualify for enough CareCredit on my own, and asked my father to jointly apply with me, and we qualified for enough to cover the costs (WOOHOO!!). The caveat is, he will only allow me to use the CareCredit if my mother supports the decision.

About a year ago, I brought up the idea of a Lap Band with my parents, and they were extremely against the idea. My mom was angry and said I just needed to do things that I'm sure we're all sick of hearing- join WW, talk to a dietitian, exercise more.... the whole gamut of things that obviously never worked. I know a lot of it is probably fear of going into surgery. After a year of research and more weight gain, I am sure this is what I need. However, I am afraid to bring it up to my mother as the whole procedure depends on her support, and I really need and want that support. I'm a single, 26 year old female. I know this probably sounds silly, considering my age, but without them I have no way of affording the procedure. Plus, I really don't want to go through this alone, and would love so much for them to be on board and cheerlead me on! Has anyone been in a similar situation with parents, spouses, or loved ones? How did you tell/convince them this was the right thing and that it just wasn't going to happen through normal diet and exercise?

[Kitt3000 757]

Often, we fear the unknown. Perhaps you could ask your parents to attend a WLS seminar with you? Ask if they would come to your doctors appointment with you? As a parent, I want my children to be healthy and happy. No matter what, I will support or at the very least, keep my mouth shut, if I disagree. It is after all, their body, and at the age of consent.

You are asking for a sizable amount of money, and by your father and mother being jointly responsible, your father is acting appropriately in including her in their financial decisions.

You are to be commended for realizing your success with your WLS, entails support from your team. I hope you are successful in starting your WLS adventure. Your parents have done a good job so far with you, so help them with their concerns regarding your safety, and the financial commentment as well. Big hugs! Rooting for you!

Kitt

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,721]

its nice to have family/friends support

but i feel the support we need comes from within

my family and friends wont make me eat or make better food choices

my family and friends wont make me walk when i know i need to/or should

my family and friends wont make me...

it is ME

it is YOU

you do this for you

everyone has opinions on any WLS

good and bad..its life...

most the ones (family/friends) have no idea what it involves and only know what they read or hear

on the web or wherever else....

hang in there

dig down deep, look in the mirror and tell anyone who asks why, how come

that you are going to be and get healthy with whatever WLS you get. and then do it.

[shellyd88 463]

Tryingthis hi this is just a thought and if u haven't already maybe if u told her that this a tool that u feel u need to help you be able be physically able to eat less that WW and the like can't offer? will she consider attending an informational meeting with whatever program your considering for your procedure? To help her understand what really happens and how it changes ppls lives? have u tried printing out any info or articles for her to read ? Are u involved in any support groups for this usually the surgeons or clinics/hospitals that do these procedures have support groups ask her to attend a few with u but u go first get to know ppl and there story's and outcomes then bring her in let her see how much better/healthier life can be for you I'm so sorry they are holding back the financial support u need u may be able to change their minds over time maybe u won't be able to don't let it deter u if y really want this perhaps u could consider going to Mexico as others here have done it's also self pay but much less expensive around $ 5/6,000 plus travel I guess that would depend on where u are and how u get there best of luck!

[tryingthis 1]

Thanks for the support everyone!

Yes, I would LOVE for my mom to be on board with this, as we are very close and her support is extremely important in my success.

I love the idea of attending a seminar, but unfortunately we kind of live in the middle of nowhere, and the only seminar I've been able to find close to us conflicts with our schedules. I did find a few great resources online that I would like to show her- so if anyone else has seen any great online seminars or videos, please let me know.

THANKS!

[briefs199 337]

NYU has an online course. The website is thinforlife.com