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This is so real now... any advice anyone?



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I AM sitting here this morning any just noticing a lot of anxiety setting in for me... I was just approved for surgery Friday, and am anticipating surgery at the end of NEXT week... The anxiety of this whole thing seems to be hitting me for the first time... I've been an athlete my entire life, and have let my weight get out of control over the past 6 years... I find myself questioning whether this is all going to be worth it, even though I know why I am having surgery, and why I began down this path in the first place... for myself, for my wife and 4 month old daughter... I had a dad that died when he was 42... dropped dead from a heart attack getting out of the shower, and I am on this path so that my daughter doesn't have to go through missing her dad like my sister misses her dad... and like I miss him now... I just turned 37 in July...

I am always confused about which forums are for what, being a newbie on this site, but I'm just wondering if anyone has any advice for me going into what is going to be a major life changing event and hopefully will change the course of my family and stuff... I am really noticing what the impact of this is going to have on my wife and the changes she will have to endure as a result of my new diet... I hope to go back to work here in the next few months, and being a coach myself, I want to return there and be able to be a good example to my athletes... Does ANYONE have any advice heading into this surgery that they can give me to help with the anxiety that right now seems to be building by the minute?? It's funny how sometimes it's easier to open up about stuff like this to total strangers than it is to let in those that love you the most to help, but I honestly don't know how anyone that I know could understand what I am going through right now...

Thanks for listening and any insight some of you may be able to offer...

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First of all what you are feeling is normal but surgery is so well worth it I'm almost 5 months post opt and can do everything, I'm feeling great and soon you will too.

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how was your adjustment to food afterwards?? I think I'm making it worse than it is... but nonetheless I am having this anxiety...

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I had initial regrets the first week out of surgery, which I hear is normal, but I have not regretted it since! I feel amazing! I can do things I haven't done in years--I have stamina, energy, and my cholesterol level has never been this good, my blood pressure is amazing, everything!

You do have to make lifestyle changes but since you are a coach and athlete, I think this is going to be all right up your alley.

You just have to make food something that helps you live, not live to eat anymore. There are some times when I am traveling that it can be a bit difficult but it's not impossible, you can have really good food, it's just healthy too. Once you start to feel better, you won't really want pizza or french fries or anything like that (my weaknesses) as much.

Follow the instructions your doctor and nutrionist give you and you will be great!!

Try to relax and enjoy the journey you are about to embark on. It's a really nice ride.

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I had RNY just over a month ago. I've not had the first regret. I've lost 22 pounds in the last month, it took me from February to September to lose the 20 pounds I lost before surgery. I'm off half of the meds I was on for diabetes and high blood pressure and expecting the rest to go in the next month. Other than needing to go to bed earlier because I get tired, I feel great! Very minimum pain, and that was gas the first two days. Not being hungry is more empowering than I can explain to you.

As others have said, being nervous is to be expected. So long as you have done all your research and are sure this is what you want, then I say just relax, and do everything your team tells you to do.

I wish you the very best of luck!

Carol

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I was so nervous that I just didn't even read any of the negative possibilities. I am 6 weeks out and I feel the best I have in years! I too have been doing so much more than I have in the past. I am extremely excited for the future. The advise I would give it to stick to the diet plan they have for you. My program was Clear liquids for a day. I had trouble even getting liquids down. I just didn't care at all about eating or drinking. I wasn't sick or feeling down just didn't want to eat or drink. 2nd day - week 3 went to "full Liquid" diet. Yogurt, Protein drinks and the like. Week 4 - 5 pureed foods. Week 6 - 7 as the weeks have gone the Water is easier to get down. Soft foods this week. I am looking forward to the change to soft foods. I have lost 64 lbs by following this plan. Be careful of saying it won't hurt me to have this. Your stomach isn't ready for it. I wish you the best of luck. You CAN do this! I also suggest you have a great support team to keep you on your path!

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IT sounds like some of your anxiety is about what life will be like afterwards in regards to food. Try to stay focused on the fact that you're doing this to change your relationship with food, not go back to the same eating patterns. Yes, you will eat differently. But it's not worse, it's a chance to be better! My husband had his surgery over 2 years ago, lost 130 lbs. and has kept it off. He feels fantastic and, honestly, he eats just about anything he wants. But less of it and not as often. Will you even knuckle down at a buffet again? No, maybe not. Buffets are sort of a waste of money for us now (I am 7 weeks post-surg) but I think of all the times I left a buffet hating myself, saying "that was stupid". Now I can order one really good meal and enjoy it slowly. And I will do it in MUCH smaller jeans, and I'll be happy with that. Anxieties are normal this close to surgery, and the first few months can be rocky for some people. But you aren't doing this for a quick fix. You're doing it for the rest of your life, so a few months is a small investment to a healthy forever!

I'd recommend that your wife be educated on your upcoming diet changes and that you really make it clear to her that you need her support. It will be very hard for you if she is eating pizza and wings while you sip a Protein shake. This is a chance for your whole family to eat healthy, if they aren't already.

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Everything you are feeling is very normal. I was very nervous and anxious before my surgery and although things have been a bit challenging at times, it gets better everyday. The pain from the gas used during the laparascopic procedure was the worst part for me immediately post surgery, but it quickly got better as I was able to get up and walk. I had a drain for 4 days after my surgery and it was annoying, but not unbearable.

Since coming home, the first week was the worst. I had very little energy, but kept sipping Protein drinks and Water all day and things slowly improved. I did feel somewhat deprived after I got home when everyone else was eating and I was sipping, but that got better once I moved from Clear Liquids to full liquids. Now I'm at the pureed and soft stage and it's better still. I have had my missteps - tried to eat a little baked fish yesterday and it came right back up - but mostly I'm trying to take it slow and concentrate on getting in my Protein and keeping up with the walking. Some days are better than others, but I feel like I'm on an upward swing.

I agree with others that the more your wife understands what you will be dealing with, the better she can support you.

Wishing you the best of luck as you begin your journey!

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If you are a food addict like me - yes you will feel anger , out of control emotions, helpless, suffocated and panicky I'm 4 weeks out and I've processed all of these feelings. I'm learning to stay busy. I can't sit around and let the addiction take over. I hope with more weight loss to start jogging. I just need to keep propelling forward. Yes surgery was the right choice for me. 100% sure.

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My surgery is coming up before the end of the year. Once you have made your mind up to do this, pray for the courage to do this. I also pray for the doctor and all the health care people who will be working on me and I pray for my family, friends, and co- workers who will be by my side during recovery. In the words is St Padre Pio-"pray, hope, and don't worry".

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My surgery is this Wednesday, October 15th. I found a great book that helped with the anxiety I had just like yours. The name of the book The Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion by Tanie Miller Kabala. Dr. Kabala takes your through all the range of emotions you will experience before and after surgery. Good luck!!

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