Keeping it a secret

[Aribay1 198]

Is anyone else out there keeping it from friends and possibly family?

So far only 4 people know my brother my parents and my boyfriend. I have two main friends that I work with and idk I guess I feel like they will judge me and say I'm taking the easy way out.

I'm still thinking of a life as to what surgery I'm having to get 2 weeks off from work. Luckily i don't need doctor notes. Should I bother telling my friends. The only reason I see me telling them is if they keep trying to shove food down my throat. Also they are both health freaks now and one friend has tried to help me loose weight but basically gave up.

HELP

[naturalbabe77 16]

Is anyone else out there keeping it from friends and possibly family?

So far only 4 people know my brother my parents and my boyfriend. I have two main friends that I work with and idk I guess I feel like they will judge me and say I'm taking the easy way out.

I'm still thinking of a life as to what surgery I'm having to get 2 weeks off from work. Luckily i don't need doctor notes. Should I bother telling my friends. The only reason I see me telling them is if they keep trying to shove food down my throat. Also they are both health freaks now and one friend has tried to help me loose weight but basically gave up.

HELP

I haven't told many people and I don't plan to right now. My mom, fiance, older kids and a good friend. I don't need any negativity prior to surgery. I told the ones that matter. After surgery when I start losing weight, I will tell others. I know they will want to know what I'm doing to lose weight and I'm not going to lie about it.

[sleevedup 46]

I think it all depends. I am have not yet had surgery but I do not plan on telling anyone except my mother. As much as I love my family and friends, I don't think telling them will add any extra social support that would really benefit me. They may unintentionally even mention it to others and that is also something I personally don't want. There is so much ignorance surrounding obesity, the perception of those in our community is that we are lazy and lack self-control. So naturally, the solution of surgery would just be seen as the "lazy" and "easy way out." I am not signing up to be the spokes person for VSG (although I honestly admire those who are open and do it to inform others..big ups!) and the journey is difficult enough. As for eating situation, that's a bit trickier. I have yet to cross that bridge but have some thoughts on how to handle it. I figure I can always chalk my new found way of eating as a lifestyle change (which it is indeed) and that my friends respect me enough to understand and leave it at that.

Good stuff to think about though. For me it all boils down to why I want to tell them and if it is beneficial to me. It may sound selfish, but hey, I am doing this for me:)

[BitterSweet* 835]

If you feel like you can handle the offensive comments with ease, then it really doesn't matter if people know.

[ayscott74 99]

Hi I haven't told anyone at work only ppl that know is my family and some, friends that are happy for me. I know, they wont go around telling ppl. I had my surgery on August 11 and I had to have my hiatal hernia fix to good thing because my husband said if someone ask what surgery I was having he said that he was, just going, to say female issue I laughed but now if they ask I just say hernia repair. But it up to you on how you feel and what you want to tell them and remember this isnt a, easy way out. You still have to put work in the surgery for it to work. Making you eat the right things that wont make you sick after eating it. If they notice I am losing weight is because I have been bringing shake and low fat low carb thing to eat before surgery. I am 9 days post op lost 17lbs already and I am back at work. No problem still dont have an appetite. Just making sure to have my Fluid intake where it needs to be. I wish you the best journey and congrats on your new healthy self.

[Easterli 12]

I've only told my husband and my boss. No family, no co workers.

[Aribay1 198]

Thanks everyone! Recently I told my two best friends and surprisingly they are just concerned with my health

[kimmerzj29 52]

I'm only in the beginning stages of surgery and I've already made the decision to not tell many people, I've told my husband, mom,dad,sister,boss and one close girlfriend just because it's no one business!!! I told my boss cause she said she will help me and be my work support! Obv I need to take time off so she needs I understand lol I don't think it's anyone's business but your own! And when ur losing the weight and people are saying your looking great just say thank you and move on! It's going to be hard but no one need to know of the journey you have taken!!!

[Rovobay 920]

As a private kind of guy, I am choosing not to tell anyone besides my wife (support person). just don't want the attention or unsolicited comments/advise. there are a lot of people who don't know enough about the procedure that maybe judgmental. whatever you choose, good luck!!!

[Kindle 8,667]

All of my friends and family knew I was having surgery. They obviously had tons of questions, but they all love me and supported my decision. Postop I tell 90% of the people that ask about my weight loss that I had surgery. The other 10% are clients I don't necessarily like and have no interest in having non-work related conversations with. It's made things a lot easier than lying because I get asked about my weight loss pretty much everyday. 99% of the people I tell see the remarkable results and are very supportive. I've had 2 people say something negative, but their comments made them look ignorant in front of a whole lot of other people.

If you aren't going to tell people, you need to come up with a consistent, believable story or they will just keep bugging you for answers. In the beginning you will be questioned about your odd eating habits and afterwards the dramatic weight loss will definitely attract attention.

[KatieD6982 68]

I'm somewhat keeping it a secret, mostly because I just don't want to hear other people's rude comments. My parents know, my hubby, and two girls at work. Well, I've told one good friend who seemed shocked so that's when I decided I'm not going to be telling anyone else.

Our society is so judgemental and I am very sensitive. I know I will have to deal with comments afterwards but I feel as though I'll be better prepared.

[downsizingdiva 460]

I have told absolutely no one except fiance...don't want opinions, suggestions, etc...I'm so glad I haven't!

[happymama2014 206]

I only told a few close friends and my mom . My family would gossip and I don't want that . My coworkers are all young and do cross fit and run in marathons so I'm not saying anything. I'm already losing weight and I implied I am in special diet because of high blood sugar and health problems... Which is partially not technically a lie....but I plan to say I started new medications and needed a few weeks while it adjusts. I'm only taking 1-2 weeks off vacation.

[alexsisv 139]

I'm very selective on who I'm telling. I told my work that I was having surgery. End of sentence.

I think I'm going to smack the first person who says I took the easy way out. Lol

[fitbefore30 32]

I feel the same way, I haven't told many people. Only my mom, dad, aunt, my boss and 1 other person at work because she planing on doing the same thing. I just don't want to hear any negative opinions before surgery.