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My sister....grrrrrrrrrrrrrr



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So she lives 1000 miles away. is ten years older than me, and her doctor told her she needs to lose THREE POUNDS!! She is the only one of my siblings I told about my surgery and just did so a couple of weeks ago. Amongst all the dumb statements and questions, today she said, instead f congratulating me on losing 63 lbs, "When you get to where you want to be, you are going to be really saggy and wrinkled".

I feel so much better now

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I keep getting those comments too and it is really beginning to piss me off. My "best friend" said she would rather be fat than have loose skin. Another woman who was eavesdropping on a conversation I was having with my fiancé, a complete stranger... Said, "you better start saving to get all your extra skin removed." I'm sure if I had a sister and she said that, it may sting a little more than a complete stranger. Either way it is so unpleasant and degrading to hear. For what it's worth I think you are beautiful! Try not to let the haters get to you!

Edited by KristinaRnY

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Good thing you live 1000's of miles away and don't have to face her every day! I'm in NJ and my sister is in Louisiana and I think that's perfect! lol She and her husband lost over 100 pounds combined from what I hear just doing My Fitness Pal. Great for them. I'm sure she'll be TOTALLY supportive if she ever finds out I had surgery! NOT!!!

Nothing like sisterly love!

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She was the only one I told and actually the only one I am close to out of 6 remaining siblings. I didn't tell her for over 3 months. Her first comment was "why couldn't you just eat like that w/o the surgery?" i told her that with a regular sized stomach I would starve to death!! She is one of those people who "doesn't get it", even though another sister of ours had the first "intestinal bypass" 39 years ago, lost down from over 400 lbs and ate way too much and had constant sh*** and after some years gained back about 100 lbs. I know the surgery was way different then. Of course this sister I told, I have not seen since 2009 and she had no idea until I told her that I had gained to 270. She cannot seem to lose her "3 lbs" but expects me to starve off over 100. I would send her that cartoon about what she can do with her opinion but I don't want to lose her.......I will just tell her "less" and expect the same

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Be bold and tell her what you told us. She was the only sibling you shared this with and you are disappointed in her response. Great place to start and tell her like it is. She won't know she offended you until you tell her.

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    • LeighaTR

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      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

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      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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