Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I have lost my way



Recommended Posts

I am lost. I have not been documenting like I was. I have not been eating enough Protein or drinking enough fluids. I have been grazing. I have not been taking my Vitamins like I am supposed to.

OK, now that I have admitted my sins I can ask for help. I am truly seeking help to get me back on track. I am very discouraged and not sure how to do this anymore. (Before anyone says it, I have started seeing a therapist.)

I see before and after shots of people and I don’t get it. I do not see how I will ever be close to being that small. I really don’t see me being smaller then I am now. Don’t get me wrong 70lbs is amazing, but it is not as much as me or my MD want lost. I am still doing well with exercise; I missed measuring myself this month. So there could be inches and not pounds lost at this time. People are starting to notice enough to say something and that is a little encouraging.

I know that I am stress, anxious, and depressed (hence the reason I started therapy). I know that is effecting my eating...well affecting everything. I also know that I can’t seem to push myself over this hump.

Any thoughts? Anyone go though this? Anyone willing to help or maybe mentor me?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Jill I think you know exactly what to do...You said it all in the first few lines of your post.

Back to basics girl...Stop grazing and drink your Water.. Dense Proteins first, veggies, fruit, complex carbs....

3 square meals a day and 2 Snacks..Snacks are nuts, cheese, fruit, yogurt, things like that...Meals are 1 cup of food...mostly dense Protein....You may want to take a few days and return to liquids to restart your journey.....Protein rich liquids..

Vitamins....Look you really need those.. There is no way your body can absorb enough Vitamins and minerals by food a lone...A long with the stress you are facing your body is going to start to rebel on you..Run down and out of steam......

The therapy might help..But this is your trek, no one else can run it for you girl....We can help you and encourage you but we can't fix you...While you are seeing the therapist...Stay close to the forum and look for those who can help you, encourage you and stay close to you...Start to really sort things out in your head.....Say it out loud what you are feeling and thinking and you will find that you will feel better and once you change your relationship with food....you will be so much happier....I promise! :)

You did this because you wanted a better healthier you..You must still want it or you would not be reaching out for help..Good for you kid!!!!!

Anything I can do, ,just PM me and I'll do my best to give you some help..:)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't you just love RJ? She is so encouraging!! She helped me yesterday! I've been falling off the wagon a bit too. As a matter of fact my weight loss has slowed down tremendously, and I've been pretty discouraged about it too. But like RJ said, I'm going to get back to basics. The fact that we still care and are reaching out for help means we want to do something about it. Like I was told yesterday, we only fail when we stop trying. I started out at 280, lost 74 pounds and it's like everything just slowed or stop. I had my sleeve done Nov-2012. I still have 56 pounds to go until my goal, so it's definitely been a struggle emotionally for me. But, we are not alone! We all need help and support sometimes, and reaching out for it means we still love ourselves enough to keep going and pushing through and realizing it's not a race! I personally need to address my emotions more when it comes to food. So that's the first step I will take. That and starting over by a reset, by getting back to basics. Best of luck to you Hun, we all know you can do this. We all have your back!! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand where you are right now, I have been there many times myself. But I can see from how you write that you are a strong person. No one is ever perfect, we all fall off the bandwagon now and then. If someone says that they NEVER cheat, I would say that either they are in denial or they are not being honest. It is human nature to fall back on what is familiar when we are struggling with something unresolved in life. The therapist will help you get back on track by identifying the issues that have stopped your momentum.

Tell yourself, "I can do it" and then believe it. I do not even know you or your story, and I am new here, but I can tell when someone is going to succeed just by the way that they are able to identify the issue, admit that they are not perfect and seek the help and support they need. Doing all those things makes you a WINNER and winners do not give up or lose the fight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't had my surgery yet, but knew a large part of success will be learning how to lessen the connection between emotions and eating. One book has helped me a lot: "Emotional First + Aid Kit: A Practical Guide to Life After Bariatric Surgery" by Cynthia Alexander. Hope this helps!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you Jill for your honesty. I am only day 4 post sleeve and have found this adventure quite emotional and leaving me with a lot of self doubt. RJ's comments were sooooo helpful and I hope she keeps them coming. Thank you RJ. I also took note of the suggestion from Beagle Lover about a book that she found "emotional first aid bariatric survival guide. I am usually not a person to read up about what I'm doing but my emotions got me here and the physiological changes are under way but my issues with food are still issues. I plan to see my Psychiatrist and get my back side into an actual support group meeting. You've done so well Jill so hang in there and continue to give me hope. If you can do it, maybe I can.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×