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I didn't have a "last straw". I had been living my life resigned to the fact that I'd never date, never marry, never have kids. You just don't put yourself out there when your severely overweight because you fear rejection, and if you don't put yourself out there, you'll never find anyone. Well about a year and a half ago I met my boyfriend, and at first we were just coworkers, and I developed a huge crush on him. He's average size so it NEVER occurred to me he was interested romantically in me at all. Well after two months of being buddies I drunkenly confessed my feelings at a coworker's house warming party and was shocked to find out he felt the same way!! I hadn't dated in almost six years so it was a huge deal to me. Well we are in love and he's the most wonderful thing that could have every happened to me. I have no doubt in my mind or heart he's the man I'll spend my life with. That being said, I started see myself having a future, a long one, with children and a husband. I decided I wanted to not only enjoy my life myself, but be healthy and live as long a life as possible for Chris and for any children we have in the future. Being in love with him has made me see life in a different way. His mother may think I'm too fat and ugly for him, but he thinks I'm beautiful inside and OUT. He's actually a little scared I'm gonna get thin and decide I'm too hot for him and dump him. He's so sweet, he has no idea how much I love him!!!

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I had a boyfriend once, whose mom thought I was too fat for him. I thought that was really interesting, considering she was about 5x size of me and had trouble walking due to the size of her legs. Luckily for me (at the time), he didn't seem to care or worry about what she thought.. Think it's weird how in-laws are like that now. My fiance's parents have never said anything, and think of me as their daughter already, but if they ever cared about it, my fiance never told me.

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I used to feel pretty, but I had gotten to the point of not caring about hair and makeup..... I feel empowered and for the first time in a long time I see the light at the end of the tunnel......

i've never cared about hair and make up ... now that i've dropped some of the weight, i find that i will not go out of the house without at least mascara on. most days at work it's full foundation/makeup/blush/etc... what a difference.

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Let me give you an example of what happened to me - I went from this (June of 2006 to January 2007) to that. See the difference? I was at my weight that I am now in June, and by November, I went from 195 to 248! Man, talk about a lot of weight gain in a short period. And notice the difference in hair and makeup.

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Sunshine, I happen to think 1) you look alot like a friend of mine and 2) your stunning. Keep up the good work!

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Thanks Sissy - I have a long way to go, but I'm so happy with my progress and happy that I no longer feel so depressed and lost like I did before my surgery.

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And I have said it before, I agree with WASabubblebutt about paying for it. My insurance won't cover it. But I was getting it done, no matter WHAT. I was prepared to sell my car, and some other things I knew I could get money for. That would have paid for it. I ended up getting funding from family, but if that had not happened I would have had no problem downsizing my life. I'd rather live poor for longer, than have fancy taste and die in my 30's.

Just another thought... MO people get passed over for promotions, or just don't get jobs at all due to personal bias from interviewers and corporate bias because of insurance costs.

Being poor now, and getting healthy, means you will have an easier time getting a better job later.

:]

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Brandi: This post has moved me to respond...... this was me New Years Eve 2001... except my note was on the kitchen counter, and we had planned a party inwhich I had to call everyone and tell them it was off and why....... Your post brought me dead and center back to that awful time.

Tracy - It really has been a blur, but I smiled for the first time three weeks ago. I've started to notice that things are getting better. I am glad you said something. It is nice to know that we are not alone in things like this, and that life does manage to go on. :-)

You could never describe that moment to an individual that hasnt experienced it. It is impossible.

(hugs) to you girl.

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I knew when I started wearing 4x t-shirts I was in trouble. Thank goodness a new friend told me about lab band.

edie

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edieparks - you look GREAT! Look what you have accomplished in LESS than a year! Wow! I saw your before & after pics week or so ago, and my jaw dropped - good job!

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Brandi: This post has moved me to respond...... this was me New Years Eve 2001... except my note was on the kitchen counter, and we had planned a party inwhich I had to call everyone and tell them it was off and why....... Your post brought me dead and center back to that awful time.

Tracy - It really has been a blur, but I smiled for the first time three weeks ago. I've started to notice that things are getting better. I am glad you said something. It is nice to know that we are not alone in things like this, and that life does manage to go on. :-)

You could never describe that moment to an individual that hasnt experienced it. It is impossible.

(hugs) to you girl.

Tracy and Brandi - you both are going to make it, you have proven you are strong women and your doing great. It may not be easy at times, but you WILL get thru this. Your both doing so good and are an inspriration to many women out there. And remember, its their loss, they lost something valuable!

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what a great thread this is. I have been reading posts for quiet awhile. I think i have maybe posted 4 or 5 times. then one of the post had a reply and went to my email.

God's timing - I see myself becoming that 800 # person. the more "diets" i try the more i gain back. When i have my mind set on the diet my body has things going on that the doctor will not address the weight until the other is taken care of. My mother was here 2 weeks ago, she battles her weight and has lossed 50#, when she was leaving to return home to az, she goes,"now we have drew the line in the sand for good this time right, yea mom"

I don't want to be that person... I am an administrator of an Assisted Living, I love my residents and i want to live to be old like they are- I don't want to die and at this rate i am going it wont be long.

So whoever started this post- thank you- and thank you Was a bubb;e butt for sharing, that is my eye opener-thank God for my husband who supports my decisions... now if i can just have the courage to put all the pieces together.

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Just another thought... MO people get passed over for promotions, or just don't get jobs at all due to personal bias from interviewers and corporate bias because of insurance costs.

Being poor now, and getting healthy, means you will have an easier time getting a better job later.

:]

One of my reasons for the surgery is that I am in the middle of changing careers and not only do I want to be a good role model, I also want to get healthy and look like I can handle the job. To be effective I will need a lot of energy and stamina. At first I thought that desire a selfish reason, but the more i lose and the healthier I feel, not to mention the self-confidence I am gaining, it was hogwash to feel that way. If I had this surgery sooner I would have realized by life goals before 45.

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My last straw was accupuncture! 5 needles in each ear, 1 in the tops of both feet, 4 in each leg. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! Am I stupid? This was it. No more!!! "It's suppose to curb your cravings" Hokey Pokey!! The only thing I got was a sore ear!!! That night I made up my mind....

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