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lying to myself...........

bngarza

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bngarza    14

bngarza
Posted

I have been lying to myself about how over weight I was. I put that I started at 270 even tho I was 290 when I started my journey to a new me. I was so ashamed to be that heavy. I then look at the other posts and i thought I am not alone. I changed my ticker to say I started at 290. I know I will not be judged on this site. I have been so beat down about my weight. in truth I was only lying to myself. Everyone else could see that i was almost 300 pounds. My husband knew it but decided to keep his mouth shut. (smart man) Not that it mattered to him. he loves me any size or shape. He is happy that I am getting the sleeve. He has been so supportive.

Thanks for letting me vent.

B~

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Madam Reverie    2,958

Madam Reverie
Posted

Hey, there's no shame in admitting how big you were, honey.

We've all been there.

Just think, in a perverse way, when you reach goal, it'll have such a bigger significance and magnitude of achievement.

Hell, you're down 44lb as it is. That's bleedin' awesome!!!

Chin up, chicken. You're doing brilliantly :)

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Domika03    309

Domika03
Posted (edited)

Don't feel bad about lying about your weight. I'm pretty sure we've all done that in some way or another, at some time or another. You're making strides to change your lifestyle & get healthier. That's what counts :)

Best of luck on your journey!

Edited by Domika03
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RJ'S/beginning    5,358

RJ'S/beginning
Posted

At first I would say 380 in a very hushed tone..Took me weeks to tell my hubby how much i weighed.............Now to hell with it..That is not me any longer that was the old scared me.........

I am down 182 lbs...that is magnificent if I do say so myself~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of my weight loss and on here I share it because I know there are others who understand that it is a big deal and big achievement. If I can't be honest with people who are struggling with the same issues.. Then I will never be able to be honest with myself...And hun...........you did that just now........................Super duper you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

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BigGirlPanties    957

BigGirlPanties
Posted

good girl... you have to be true to you to make this work!!! Congrats on the weight loss...

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McButterpants    2,846

McButterpants
Posted

I agree with Reverie - there's nothing to be ashamed of. While our journeys to 200, 225, 250, 275, 300 and more were all different, it's our action to our individual numbers that draws us together.

Like your husband, mine said nothing about my weight ever. I would have been angry had he said something - I knew I was fat, I didn't need him reminding me of that fact. I always kept my weight a secret from him - when I told him I got to 256 pounds right before surgery, he was shocked. Really shocked - that's how much he weighs. I told him, "Honey, you and I have weighed the same for 8 years now. I can tell you the exact day that I caught up to you. We went to the doctor's office together and the nurse commented to me that I weighed the same as you." It was not my proudest moment.

My biggest denial wasn't about the number of my weight....It was the size. I was jamming myself into size 20 jeans. I refused to by a larger size. In reality, I was probably was a snug 22 or even a 24. Gasp!!!!! I used to have to lay down on the bed in order to get my jeans zipped. I had to lose about 20 pounds before those jeans fit comfortably.

So you were 290 vs. 270 when you started - on my driver's license, I'm a svelte 200...a number I haven't seen in about 14 years! You're here now and you're amongst friends.

Best wishes to you!

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Noor1969    150

Noor1969
Posted

Please don't be ashamed of yourself. I initially saw my surgeon in November and gained 10 pounds by the time I saw her again in December. Thankfully I am on the preop diet now and have lost all the weight I gained. I'm currently 257.

You're among friends here. It doesn't matter how much you weigh, what does matter is your commitment to learning as much about the procedure as you can, and getting healthy! We're here to help you. :)

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Dorothy76    9

Dorothy76
Posted

I started at 382 pounds but told everyone I was around 360. I don't know why that 22 pounds mattered to me so much but it did. I decided to stop lying to myself and everyone else as well, Because if I couldn't face my problem, how was I going to fix it. So the day before I was sleeved I took front, back and side pictures of myself wearing a tight tank top and yoga pants. I then posted those pictures and my weight on Facebook for everyone to see!!! I had a lot of people ask me "why did you do that"... or "aren't you embarrassed?" Yes I was very embarrassed and ashamed but I also felt tremendous relief for some reason. Now I know there are pictures of me in very tight clothes showing every roll I have floating around cyber space, but I feel more free now for it.

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RJ'S/beginning    5,358

RJ'S/beginning
Posted

I started at 382 pounds but told everyone I was around 360. I don't know why that 22 pounds mattered to me so much but it did. I decided to stop lying to myself and everyone else as well, Because if I couldn't face my problem, how was I going to fix it. So the day before I was sleeved I took front, back and side pictures of myself wearing a tight tank top and yoga pants. I then posted those pictures and my weight on Facebook for everyone to see!!! I had a lot of people ask me "why did you do that"... or "aren't you embarrassed?" Yes I was very embarrassed and ashamed but I also felt tremendous relief for some reason. Now I know there are pictures of me in very tight clothes showing every roll I have floating around cyber space, but I feel more free now for it.

I admire your strength!!!!!!!!!! Don't know if that would have worked for me the same but if it was the best thing for you..Wow..you did it!!!!!You are free!!!!!!!!!

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Beach Lover    1,084

Beach Lover
Posted

I started out at 293 and couldn't believe that I was actually that big. This is the first place that i truly felt comfortable in telling the truth about my weight. I had never done it before now. None of us here would judge you. I am glad you decided to be truthful with your weight we will always support you. You are doing terrific!! :)

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Dorothy76    9

Dorothy76
Posted

I started at 382 pounds but told everyone I was around 360. I don't know why that 22 pounds mattered to me so much but it did. I decided to stop lying to myself and everyone else as well, Because if I couldn't face my problem, how was I going to fix it. So the day before I was sleeved I took front, back and side pictures of myself wearing a tight tank top and yoga pants. I then posted those pictures and my weight on Facebook for everyone to see!!! I had a lot of people ask me "why did you do that"... or "aren't you embarrassed?" Yes I was very embarrassed and ashamed but I also felt tremendous relief for some reason. Now I know there are pictures of me in very tight clothes showing every roll I have floating around cyber space, but I feel more free now for it.

I admire your strength!!!!!!!!!! Don't know if that would have worked for me the same but if it was the best thing for you..Wow..you did it!!!!!You are free!!!!!!!!!

Thank you :)

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Zoumommy    61

Zoumommy
Posted

At first I would say 380 in a very hushed tone..Took me weeks to tell my hubby how much i weighed.............Now to hell with it..That is not me any longer that was the old scared me......... I am down 182 lbs...that is magnificent if I do say so myself~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of my weight loss and on here I share it because I know there are others who understand that it is a big deal and big achievement. If I can't be honest with people who are struggling with the same issues.. Then I will never be able to be honest with myself...And hun...........you did that just now........................Super duper you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

awesome job!! How long have you had the sleeve?

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RJ'S/beginning    5,358

RJ'S/beginning
Posted

At first I would say 380 in a very hushed tone..Took me weeks to tell my hubby how much i weighed.............Now to hell with it..That is not me any longer that was the old scared me......... I am down 182 lbs...that is magnificent if I do say so myself~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of my weight loss and on here I share it because I know there are others who understand that it is a big deal and big achievement. If I can't be honest with people who are struggling with the same issues.. Then I will never be able to be honest with myself...And hun...........you did that just now........................Super duper you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

awesome job!! How long have you had the sleeve?

Nov.6th 2012... :) That is the day my world turned upside down!!!!!!!!!!!!

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bngarza    14

bngarza
Posted

thank you for all the support :)

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Zoumommy    61

Zoumommy
Posted

RJ

That is awesome

What were some key things you did with the sleeve to get the weight off?

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