NSV: Golden Girl

[PrettyThick1 1,860]

Hi Nana:

I've had 4 promotions since I've been here. My last one was just before I was banded in June and I received a 6% raise at that point. I was notified of my insane pay increase when I returned to work on January 6, this is called a pay-grade adjustment since I was "grandfathered-in" and changes occurred that were not filtered to me in a timely manner - which resulted in 20k more per year - to my knowledge this has no happened before, but we don't go around discussing our salaries or bonuses, either. Say what you want, if this is descrimation then everyone should be so blessed.

Hi Karen,

Houston is known as the fattest city in the country. I live in Houston. Thinner women make more money. It's true in Texas. Not sure why. Texans don't like the frumpy look. It's not cold much, and women don't have to cover up. Jeans are the normal attire. And it pays to look good. I don't make the rules. And I don't follow them. I chose real estate and to be self employed! No person is going to chose how much money I make but me! If I work harder I make more money. Simple. But, Houston, we DO HAVE A PROBLEM!

You know what? As I think about it...it's more of a "southern" thing....

I grew up in Atlanta, and before I relocated to Mid-Atlantic, Washington, DC, Maryland areas, I remember this type of behavior down in Atlanta. I think this is why I Left...It has been almost 20 years since I left the deep south!

It was "oh she's so pretty" attitude rather than "does she know what she is doing"...lol...

When I moved north it was a "different" atmosphere, MOST of the women in the Maryland, DC and northern, Virginia areas were Highly educated and is the only area in the US where most women have college degrees and are in higher positions...I guess because a lot of women work on Capitol Hill, in DC..

And equal rights for women are more prominent in the Washington DC areas and MOST women in the DC areas make MORE money than men....they don't play that here in fact, men will get fired if they play that type of nonsense...and it's venturing on sexual harassment and discrimination...IF they try to discriminate based on weight it will be more subtle and not in your face...lol.

And...it's not that type of atmosphere in the Washington DC, Maryland and Virginia areas and MANY women are managers, directors, etc and own their own business.

Nana, this may be true now, but Capitol hill women in the 60's and 70's(maybe even still) had to be pretty, well dressed, and smart, in that order!(in fact back then, there was no slacks either!)so maybe they have moved forward quicker than the "South" but then I haven't been inside the offices of the senate and congress. Just saying! Karen..aka..kll724

I think everyone IS missing my point. I am not saying professional women don't have to "look good". In FACT MOST professional women who make a LOT OF MONEY....MUST dress for success and LOOK GOOD in their clothes...

Heck I got my lap band because I wanted to look "better" in my clothes and gain more confidence...BUT while I WAS obese I got the SAME jobs, and I was not treated any different..however...I WAS treated differently by other male colleagues...but they were not my boss...LOL..

Also you RARELY see very OBESE professional women in the media (TV) and women on Capitol Hill, especially in the Mid-Atlantic region (Washington, Virginia, Maryland) that are severely obese...

MOST women who want to get ahead KNOW that if they WANT TO COMPETE in the business world they must LOOK good in their clothes and that comes WITH being thinner...NOT necessarily being a size 6....remember some women CAN STILL look good in a size 18.

My point to PrettyThick is that it seems like sexual discrimination that while she had being working on her job for the last 9 years and all of a sudden she gets a "promotion" AFTER she lost weight and was invisible before...TO ME that sounds like discrimination....especially if she gets the raise not based on "job performance"....

You don't have to preach to me about bias against obese women in the workforce, I know it exist very well...and it's very sad...but my point was SOME areas like the Mid-Atlantic region it is not as in your face discrimination, most women are given promotions and raises based on merit...not necessarily based on what size they wear...

[PrettyThick1 1,860]

No...it sounds like your post was intended to shoot me down. But I digress and will leave you with this, my favorite poem. It gives me comfort and it sounds like you might need a little peace in your life. I hope it helps.

Desiderata

by Max Ehrman, 1927

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

“

”

Max Ehrmann, "Desiderata

Also my post is not ABOUT raining on someone's parade but making them "open' their eyes on blatant bias against obesity in the workforce.

And PrettyThick! I know you are in Texas which is a total different world of where I am, and I know you are riding high on your slim body and perks that comes along with it....I am wishing you all the perks, you can get.....

We all get noticed and treated differently when we lose weight, sometimes it can be overwhelming..

Edited January 10, 2014 by PrettyThick1

[NaNa 878]

Er....See: Scandal. Media sets the tone for beauty and I haven't seen a single overweight woman representing any part of our nations capitol.

Houston is known as the fattest city in the country. I live in Houston. Thinner women make more money. It's true in Texas. Not sure why. Texans don't like the frumpy look. It's not cold much, and women don't have to cover up. Jeans are the normal attire. And it pays to look good. I don't make the rules. And I don't follow them. I chose real estate and to be self employed! No person is going to chose how much money I make but me! If I work harder I make more money. Simple. But, Houston, we DO HAVE A PROBLEM!

You know what? As I think about it...it's more of a "southern" thing....

I grew up in Atlanta, and before I relocated to Mid-Atlantic, Washington, DC, Maryland areas, I remember this type of behavior down in Atlanta. I think this is why I Left...It has been almost 20 years since I left the deep south!

It was "oh she's so pretty" attitude rather than "does she know what she is doing"...lol...

When I moved north it was a "different" atmosphere, MOST of the women in the Maryland, DC and northern, Virginia areas were Highly educated and is the only area in the US where most women have college degrees and are in higher positions...I guess because a lot of women work on Capitol Hill, in DC..

And equal rights for women are more prominent in the Washington DC areas and MOST women in the DC areas make MORE money than men....they don't play that here in fact, men will get fired if they play that type of nonsense...and it's venturing on sexual harassment and discrimination...IF they try to discriminate based on weight it will be more subtle and not in your face...lol.

And...it's not that type of atmosphere in the Washington DC, Maryland and Virginia areas and MANY women are managers, directors, etc and own their own business.

Nana, this may be true now, but Capitol hill women in the 60's and 70's(maybe even still) had to be pretty, well dressed, and smart, in that order!(in fact back then, there was no slacks either!)so maybe they have moved forward quicker than the "South" but then I haven't been inside the offices of the senate and congress. Just saying! Karen..aka..kll724

Speaking of the TV series Scandal...

Hubby and I was on vacation at the airport out in California in July and I noticed a very small girl in the frequent flyer section....and it was Kerry Washington....

She was dressed WAY DOWN...I barely recognized her, I am sure she was dressed down because she did not want to be noticed...BUT SHE WAS VERY SKINNY....looked to be a size double 0...way smaller than she looks on TV...

She had absolutely NO BUTT, no curves what so ever!!!...sorry, but on TV she look healthier and curvy she was definitely not a Beyonce in the body department...I have to tell you...apparently it does not take MUCH to be an actor regarding looks...apparently you just have to be "skinny:...LOL...I heard she had struggled with an eating disorder too..

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,722]

pretty, such a wonderful and lovely lady..

proud of you and you deserve all the rewards you receive

[NaNa 878]

No...it sounds like your post was intended to shoot me down. But I digress and will leave you with this, my favorite poem. It gives me comfort and it sounds like you might need a little peace in your life. I hope it helps.

Desiderata

by Max Ehrman, 1927

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

“

”

Max Ehrmann, "Desiderata

Also my post is not ABOUT raining on someone's parade but making them "open' their eyes on blatant bias against obesity in the workforce.

And PrettyThick! I know you are in Texas which is a total different world of where I am, and I know you are riding high on your slim body and perks that comes along with it....I am wishing you all the perks, you can get.....

We all get noticed and treated differently when we lose weight, sometimes it can be overwhelming..

Pretty,

Sorry I did not read this post, and I am very sorry if you feel that I was trying to "shoot" you down, when I am not....

I am very happy that you are happy! keep reaping the rewards and benefits of your new slim body! I will NEVER shoot anyone down after they've lost weight, remember I am the biggest supporter of the and and weight loss! I like to spoil newbies with congrats and I am their biggest cheerleader...I got the same when I was newly banded....

I was just saying that I would personally get angry if I did not get a promotion prior to losing weight.(this has NOTHING to do with shooting you down)...

WE ALL get raises based on merit and work performed...and we should be rewarded for our hard work...regardless what size we are....

Again, I am sorry if you misunderstood what I was trying to say....

[PrettyThick1 1,860]

So are you CG! Sometimes reading your posts are all I need to brighten my day.

pretty, such a wonderful and lovely lady..

proud of you and you deserve all the rewards you receive

[kll724 3,055]

So are you CG! Sometimes reading your posts are all I need to brighten my day.

pretty, such a wonderful and lovely lady..

proud of you and you deserve all the rewards you receive

Beautiful poem. Thanks for putting it down here for us! We do have lovely people on this board!Peace to all! Karen...aka.kll724

[Sharpie 3,306]

No Matter what... We live in a very visual society... look at who we idolize. Movie Stars have to be perfect.. perfect bodies, perfect teeth, perfect hair.. even our political figures have to be good looking. I have owned my own business for many years and have had to meet with company buyers and Presidents. When I was younger and cuter I had more confidence and as I aged and got heavier I lost my confidence. It affects your ability to do your job sometimes.. There are all kinds of discriminations in the world, you can choose to not work for a company or you can choose to make the best of it. Sometimes the advantages outweight the disadvantages. As my Mother used to say "Is This the Hill you want to die on?".. In other words pick your battles carefully. Let's face it ,. we all want to look great and feel great. This is why I got my lapband.