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I would love to meet a man who is a bariatric patient. Dating someone with similar eating habits and similar body issues is an ideal partner for me.

Do I sound like a desperate, pitiful individual? Thought I would just put it out there. Wish me luck.

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No, you sound like someone ready to engage with the opposite sex and you are not afraid to say what you want ... good for you!!!! Let us know how you get on :-)

Edited by Indigo1991

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I hear ya! This new world of eating differently and the changes in my habits is so hard when trying to relate to the wife. She is sticking to bad habits and doesn't care that I need the support . It would be so refreshing to talk to someone or hang out with someone who gets it , but oh well.

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Mike

You lucky man, you have a wife AND all of us on this site... then again there are some who might not see that as being lucky, lol! If any of the guys want to step in here and reassure this man....

You can talk and hang out here and get all the support you need - there's even a forum for ranting on. You are not alone. If you have talked to your wife and are still not getting the support you need, get it from here. In time, when your wife sees your results, she might change. But this is about you, don't let anyone get in your way! Even your wife.

You can also check out the new spouses/family forum where you can read what spouses/partners are saying about the surgery - you might get some insight into why your wife is behaving as she is...

But join in posting on the site and you will meet lots of folks who find themselves in the same situation as you. Good luck!

Edited by Indigo1991

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Mike, I feel you. My husband of 31 yrs is still buying hostess pies, candy you name it. He gets mad when I don't want to shop with him. The junk is in our pantry. Sometimes I might bite a piece of chocolate. His doctor days he needs to quit eating as if he is a teenager. We usually fix 2 separate meals. I need support from him but it feels like an uphill climb.

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I would love to meet a guy that had bariatric surgery, that would be awesome! 40-55 in hawaii, are you out there?

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Good luck to you and all the other single folks!

Dating post sleeve has been a real pain. I thought it would be so great to be a single girl who was smaller, I could date, enjoy it...long story short not so much. I dated a lot last year and it was terribly exhausting. I mean dating is awkward enough but the eating out part is really frustrating on the first date. I don't like to tell people on the first date I had surgery so there is the 'what's wrong don't you like it?' Comments, or the 'want a drink?'questions you have to carefully get out of. Too much stress! It would be awesome to meet a fellow bariatric patient- they would understand the struggle.

So putting it out there- any single men in the NY metro area around my age (25) hit me up! LOL sorry had to try!

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Let see if you get this (I'm a jersey girl too). I've switched from a #5 to a sub in a tub since my journey began. You?

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Let see if you get this (I'm a jersey girl too). I've switched from a #5 to a sub in a tub since my journey began. You?

Jersey Mike's!! Sorry that I'm not a hot guy but I so recognized what you wrote...lol. I lived in Middlesex County for 18 years before moving back to NY. Though I can tell you there is a Jersey Mike's in midtown.

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Absolutely Jersey Mikes! I've been eating mikes since I cut my teeth almost 57 years ago- in the original Mikes! They are the only, and #1 hogie, in the world!

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I grew up mostly in NYC and now live in Jersey City NJ. I'd love to meet a sleeved single male who is also over 50 (like me).

I've been putting off going back to EHarmony until after plastics for skin removal on my arms and middle. A bariatric patient partner would already understand.

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I think it would make sense for folks like us to seek out others that have been down the WLS path too. I am new to the single scene and think it would be nice to find someone else that has had the surgery too.

Think of the advantages......splitting a meal, knowing the other person won't ask questions about why you cut your meal into teeny tiny bites, why you take so long to eat......you know the drill.

Edited by NJDad

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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