Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

People Are Rude



Recommended Posts

Hubby wanted Subway for dinner today so I agreed that sounded pretty good. We eat out maybe twice a month and very seldom is it fast food. Anyhow DH was still deciding what he wanted so I went ahead and ordered a 6 inch sub. I knew there was no way I could eat a foot long in one sitting and it would get soggy. Trust me it happened to me in the past. (My eyes were bigger than my pouch.) Well the young girl (slender) who took my order asked me 3 times if I was sure I only wanted the 6 inch sub. I replied 3 times "Yes I want the 6 inch sub." After that she asked one more time and I finally said "Yes that is all I can eat." She looked at me dumbfounded and then made my sub. When I got home I only ate 3inches and saved the rest for later. Why do people presume that large people eat alot? Even before my band I didn't eat huge portions, just the wrong things. People are rude.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People certainly are.

I'm a snot sometimes, I'd have probably told her to go ahead and make a footlong, but save the other half for herself because she looked like she needed a good meal.

Goodonya for speaking up and saying that you can't eat that much. I can't believe the gall of some people.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Good for you for speaking up!! When are people going to realize that everyone is not all the same?

Isn't it amazing you can't win for losing. If you had ordered a 12 inch she would have given you the "My God you eat that much!" look." You order a 6 inch and you get the "are you sure that's enough!" comment.

I used to work with a gal who was very small 5'4" 110 lbs. Never had a weight problem or a health issue. Everytime I would have a conversation with her she would "eye ball" me up and down with this discusting puckered look on her face. If we talk she always always turns the conversation to diet. It really used to piss me off!! Now I can't wait until I can go back there and be thin and be able to look her up and down...LOL. Not that I will do that. But you never know I just might!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a good response for people when they ask a rude question....

"Why do you ask?"

It's puts them in a terribly awkward position of having to explain, out loud, why they asked such a rude/personal/nosey question in the first place. Usually, they just nervously smile and say "uh, uh.... well..." and then change the subject. And they don't like it! (good!)

I am mom (adpotive) to 2 little ones- one is asian and the other is hispanic. People ask me all the time "are the yours?" and I respond "why do you ask?" .

Try it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The thing I am experiencing now that irritates me is when asking for a to-go box when eating out. Inevitably, I get a look from the server that says, "The fat girl needs a box, give me a break". It just burns me when they assume because I am heavy that I should be eating the whole meal. I never tell them why I can't because I figure it's none of their business. I also hate having to explain that the foods just fine, there is nothing wrong with it, etc. over and over and over again. I seem to get asked that all the time when the server sees that I haven't ate much. Yep, it was horrible that's why I'm asking for a to-go box. Geez! :doh:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

GOOD for you speaking up! I just went through this recently at a restuarant with water..kinda the same thing. I caved and took the darn Water after saying no 4 times. SO I will draw some strength from you! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I ask for to-go boxes when I order. "I want xyz and a box, because I know I'll need it." WHen I do get the box after I've eaten, I most commonly see concern that the meal wasn't OK... "Oh, you hardly ate anything, was it all right? Do you want something else instead?"

I wouldn't have to deal with being asked something 4 or 5 times because after time #2 it becomes a matter of - am I not answering the right question, or are you just not understanding my answer?

You guys are much nicer than I am.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have the same problem as Denise and Wheetsin. There have even been times when the wait staff have sent the manager over because they are "concerned" there was something wrong with my meal because I did not eat very much. I also never order anything to drink when we go out and the wait staff seem to have a real issue with that as well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a good response for people when they ask a rude question....

"Why do you ask?"

It's puts them in a terribly awkward position of having to explain, out loud, why they asked such a rude/personal/nosey question in the first place. Usually, they just nervously smile and say "uh, uh.... well..." and then change the subject. And they don't like it! (good!)

I am mom (adpotive) to 2 little ones- one is asian and the other is hispanic. People ask me all the time "are the yours?" and I respond "why do you ask?" .

Try it!

I love it! I'll definitely be using it!! It puts them FIRMLY in their place without being rude back. LOVE IT!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is not said to offend anyone----

When DH and I go out, if we get one of those waiters/waitresses who are at the table non stop checking to see if they can get me anything, if the food is fine, did I need drink? On and on and on---we now refer to them as "Jehovah Waitresses". They keep coming back, and refuse to take no for an answer!!!!

It makes us laugh a bit as we repeat NO!!!!

Kat

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have got to the point that I order a Water to drink when we go out and dh usually drinks it. I got so tired of being asked a dozen times if I was sure I didn't want anything to drink. If I wanted it, I would have ordered it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe we all need to order a Water and throw it at the waiter/waitress when they are annoying us. LOL! Thanks for all the responses, I am so glad I'm not in this alone!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hubby wanted Subway for dinner today so I agreed that sounded pretty good. We eat out maybe twice a month and very seldom is it fast food. Anyhow DH was still deciding what he wanted so I went ahead and ordered a 6 inch sub. I knew there was no way I could eat a foot long in one sitting and it would get soggy. Trust me it happened to me in the past. (My eyes were bigger than my pouch.) Well the young girl (slender) who took my order asked me 3 times if I was sure I only wanted the 6 inch sub. I replied 3 times "Yes I want the 6 inch sub." After that she asked one more time and I finally said "Yes that is all I can eat." She looked at me dumbfounded and then made my sub. When I got home I only ate 3inches and saved the rest for later. Why do people presume that large people eat alot? Even before my band I didn't eat huge portions, just the wrong things. People are rude.

Well, in my case, as in many...as a Large person - I DID eat alot! hehehe :(

I love the 'why do you ask' - it shuts up many a moron.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×