Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

I just had a heated discussion with my boyfriend about the lapband. Although he says he will support me in my decision he states that if I had the willpower I'd be following the diet now. He states he had faith I can do it but o should be able to do it without surgery. I want the surgery regardless

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

See if he will attend a Seminar with you. He may learn something from it. Have you dieted in the past while you've been with him? Most of us can diet and lose weight but keeping it off is always the tough part. Lapband is not a diet and in fact most of do not like to use the word diet. Lapband and living with it means making a commitment to a lifestyle change. It is not just about losing weight.

Good Luck to you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe take him to some meetings so he can learn that it is a 'Tool' to help because we can all lose weight we just can't keep it off.

Good luck and do it for you and no one else.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

seems those who are scared or have no idea are the biggest naysayers...and blowers of hot air..

sorry he hurt your feelings.....do what you want and make your self well

i hope he comes around honey,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband had the same ideas. He doubted me so much. But that's the thing--the band CAN give you some will power...at least more than what you have on your own, because it keeps you on the wagon, so to speak. That hunger that side tracks you and makes you want to cheat is what kills a diet. And if you were able to lose weight easily, then you'd have done it by now, right?

Ultimately, I decided that it is MY body and MY decision. Hubby could decide to support me or hit the highway. He chose to support me and he's even lost about 35 lbs along with me. What made him decide to support me was that he asked me to prove I was serious by dieting/exercising for at least 3 weeks without cheating (he thought I would cheat on the band)---well, my doctor asked the very same thing in the pre-op diet. So as soon as I told my stubborn old hubby that the doc agreed with him, he was on board!! LOL

Good luck, let us know how things turn out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I say, move forward with whatever you need to do to make yourself healthy AND happy. As some posters mentioned above, I think it's a very good idea to take him with you to the seminar. My sense of him, just by the little you said, is that he will be supportive whether he understands it or not. As long as he remains supportive and doesn't put you down in any way, shape or form, he can probably be educated. Once he see's the weight coming off, and you becoming a much more healthier version of YOU, he will probably (hopefully) come around.

I wish you all the best.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It took my husband about two year before he came around and finally it was his "okay" that got me going, as much as I know I have to do this for myself, I just needed to hear that word to really do it. Now that it is all said and done, he is so proud of my progress and loving the new bod ;)

It's not easy, you still have to work your butt off I will tell you that, but it's something I don't regret at all and am so happy I did this for me.

Good luck =)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

my husband has seen me yo yo for many years. he was always amazed of my will power. but the last 2 years i couldn't lose no matter the diet i was on. every medication including insulin caused weight gain. when he saw me in the ER and my heart stopped he got post traumatic stress syndrome. it freaked him out. when i got home from the hosptial he started helping me with medications and started doing more things around the house. he even started calling me from work to see how i was. when i first mentioned the wls he was all on board. reading all the articles on the internet going to my meetings etc. my family wanted me to live and know how hard i tried to lose wt. he just told me today how amazed he is with my inner strength. ahhhhhhhhh :wub:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did not want my wife to get the surgery 7 years ago but the more research she did and shared with me it started making sense. I even went to a seminar with her. I always thought losing weight was about Will power as well.

Six years ago we both got a lapband on the same day.

She kept 90 lbs off and I have kept off over 125 lbs off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ty all for your support. After sleeping we had another discussion. I explained to him why I want the surgery. I understand its not a walk in the park I've done alot of research. He still will support me and help me

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×